I've had enough, now I really want to change!!! HELP!!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 5
I've had enough, now I really want to change!!! HELP!!!
My name is Kani, I'm a hip hop artist and music producer. I accepted a long time ago that I'm an alcoholic, but this weekend I ****** up really badly and I've had enough. Reading through the forums, you guys seem to understand.
On Friday I got paid and I'm already nearly broke. I drank a bottle of Vodka on friday, drank another on saturday morning. Saturdays I usually run my business, this saturday, just like last, I DID NOTHING CONSTRUCTIVE!!!!
Saturday evening I went to a club, fell asleep in the club in front of a lot of the music and entertainment industry, woke up to find my phone gone, went to an ATM and got my card stollen (i just spoke to a guy at the bank who told me a $1000 dollars was taken, which is my daily limit).
This morning i'm trying to sort out my life (or whats left of it).
I want to stop today!!!
On Friday I got paid and I'm already nearly broke. I drank a bottle of Vodka on friday, drank another on saturday morning. Saturdays I usually run my business, this saturday, just like last, I DID NOTHING CONSTRUCTIVE!!!!
Saturday evening I went to a club, fell asleep in the club in front of a lot of the music and entertainment industry, woke up to find my phone gone, went to an ATM and got my card stollen (i just spoke to a guy at the bank who told me a $1000 dollars was taken, which is my daily limit).
This morning i'm trying to sort out my life (or whats left of it).
I want to stop today!!!
God's Kid
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 1,820
Am not a hip hop artist but
Welcome to SR. I am an alcoholic and a member of Alcoholics Anonymous.
I have also had many evenings (nights/weekends) like you have just described, when despite my best intentions I ended up drunk, missing in action and/or off wasting my life. I also had those ones were I'd wake up in the morning and try to figure out how I got home.
Have you tried AA? That is what worked for me. Not everyone on SR attends AA, everyone finds what works for them and then does it.
It's great you're here.
I have also had many evenings (nights/weekends) like you have just described, when despite my best intentions I ended up drunk, missing in action and/or off wasting my life. I also had those ones were I'd wake up in the morning and try to figure out how I got home.
Have you tried AA? That is what worked for me. Not everyone on SR attends AA, everyone finds what works for them and then does it.
It's great you're here.
Force Is Strong In This One
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 107
Hi Kani, going through the same thing at the moment, whent through about 3 bottles of vodka, wine, beer, nearly completly rinsed my wage which i got last week even to the point where im going to have to get a sub to cover bills, feeling low but trying t omove forawrd.
Use this day as your first
Use this day as your first
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,772
Congratulations on your decision to move past alcohol and live a sober life. It can be done tho it may be difficult, especially at first. AA is a good place to start but there are other recovery programs out there. Good luck in staying sober. Medical help during your detox would also be a good idea.
Be safe while getting sober!
Be safe while getting sober!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 12,136
Make a plan to assist you in getting sober - it's not too hard a decision to make when our bank account is $0 - when you have cash again you might be tempted to pick up again. Use this time wisely, talk to your dr. if necessary, and look into some recovery options. Quitting on willpower alone is very difficult.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: CA
Posts: 357
Hi Kani~
I used to play bass in local bands...not quite the same as production, but I know what you mean. The last time I played live, we were doing covers of Velvet Underground tunes at a local Tower Records store. I was supposed to play rhythm guitar and sing "Sweet Jane". I was so drunk I couldn't remember the lyrics! I walked off stage, completely humiliated.
People are great support here. Keep checking in. You will find that everyone has stories that are similar to yours. The humiliation goes away with time spent sober.
I used to play bass in local bands...not quite the same as production, but I know what you mean. The last time I played live, we were doing covers of Velvet Underground tunes at a local Tower Records store. I was supposed to play rhythm guitar and sing "Sweet Jane". I was so drunk I couldn't remember the lyrics! I walked off stage, completely humiliated.
People are great support here. Keep checking in. You will find that everyone has stories that are similar to yours. The humiliation goes away with time spent sober.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
....Welcome to SR!I agree...it seems drinking is no longer working for you.
When you quit abruptly...it can be dangerous.
That's why a medically supervised de tox is wise
Good to see you here with us.
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