CarolD

Last I heard...there is no way to predict who will
or who will not become an alcoholic.
There are studies and research papers nothing concrete.

I never knew what day or which drink slid me into alcoholism.
I considered myself to be an alcoholic when
I continued to drink despite my desire to quit.

Eventually...perhaps around the final 5 years of my drinking
depression became my daily companion.

I still had my physical health..a lover...a job...cash...credit.
Mentally I was cold and dismal...life was a nothing.

Luckily...I had situational depression and sobriety took care of that.
....and my life as a committed AA member is awesome.

I strongly suggest an honest talk with yoour doctor
and see exactly what danage ..if any..alcohol is causing.

I still smoke cigarettes ...have no interest in quitting.
I quit LSD...Pot..Peyote etc decades before I quit alcohol.
They were a non issue for me...much like you and cigarettes.

SR has a wide variety of members to share with.
...Welcome!

Daddio

Ok Slip. What constitutes an alcoholic? That is a a very good question. It is one that every alcoholic ponders in trying to make a determination as to "DO I quit or do I not quit"? You can be an alcoholic now and highly functional. Yet if you continue unchecked, then your dissease will get progressively worse. I mean, how many "Drinks" were you drinking two years ago, five ago or ten years ago? You didn't just wake up one day and start drinking 15 cocktails a day!

As for the smoking. I had my first cigarette when I was FIVE years old. I can remember it like it was yesterday. I quite seven years ago this coming 10 July. And I was up to 4 packs a day. I quit with relative ease and have not wanted one since.

To me it's just hard to make the correlation between quitting nicotine versus alcohol. Two completely different substances. Some of us addicts will tell you that quitting coke is easier that nicotine. Some will say that about alcohol. Some will say about H. There is no one answer to fit the problem.

You appear to be a very strong willed guy. You also, by your own admission, have had issues with other vices. That leads me to think that you have addictive tendencies. Trust me when I tell you that I am not judgemental. It's just that I think you are searching for some panacea that does not exist for those of us with addiction issues.

If you want to quit. Quit. If you don't, then do some soul searching to come to a conclusion.

Written with love and compassion for a fellow man.

tennis71

Hey, welcome to SR - lots here that you can learn from.

Are you an alcoholic - good question and I don't have an answer for you. I am, so I will speak from my experience only.

I don't think normal people count their drinks, it never even occurs to them that they need to. I started counting drinks in an attempt to convince myself that I didn't have a problem. For me, counting drinks was my way of denying that I was an alcoholic. I set a number in my head that only an alcoholic would drink per day, and I convinced myself that as long as I did not go above that number, I was OK. Of course that number kept growing as time went on but that was OK, because I was not an alcoholic, I just had a high tolerance.

I suggest reading 1 - 164 of the AA big book and see if any of that relates to you. Also, continue to post, read responses and learn from others in the SR community. There is a lot of experience around here and if you are an alcoholic like me, there is something you can do about it.

Oh I did forget one thing, ask yourself the following - Do I want to stop drinking? Why do I want to stop drinking? What am I willing to do to stop drinking?

Good luck, keep coming back and keep moving forward.


ps I was never hooked on smoking cigs or pot so I cannot give much insight on your other question.

Bamboozle

I know this is a little out of place, but does anyone here have a food addiction in addition to other various substance addictions? Quitting drinking for me has been very hard, but the food thing has been a problem for much longer. I know I don't need alcohol to survive, but I do need food to survive.

I watched a show on either the Discovery Channel or the History Channel and remember an obese person asking the viewing audience (this is not a quote) to consider having to take a little of the abused substance (food) everyday in order to quit the addiction. Isn't that a ridiculous proposition? Imagine having to take a little bit of crack everyday in order to kick the habit...

I guess what I'm trying to say is that because (maybe) smoking is necessary in order for your SO to live well (in her mind), she can't stop smoking easily. Maybe when she smokes everything in her world becomes harmonious and everything makes sense. Perhaps you don't believe or experience that, but maybe she does. I'm not inside either your head or hers and never will be, so I don't know. If her smoking truly does not bother her, then don't fret about it. If it does bother her, I don't know what to tell her.

Oh yeah, by the way, I've been an on-and-off smoker for the last seven years. I can take it or leave it.

Negative Man

Slipping Away... Thanks for your questions. I found that I was incredibly self-disciplined in many areas: work, exercise, writing, but when it came to alcohol I could not say no. And then, yes, it started to impact those other things.

I used to think: Okay, my grandfather was an alcoholic, so that means that I can handle my liquor better than most people! Really, that's what I would say to myself. It seemed for years that I could, but I was just fooling myself.

I can only speak for myself, but I don't believe that I "became" an alcoholic. I believe I had the disease from the get-go. It was just a long time before it impacted my life, and when it did, man, WHAMMOOOOO!!!

15 drinks is way too many. I say that because I've done it. Two things you should do: Make an appointment with your doctor and tell him everything. And I mean everything. It's in asking for help that we begin to get better... 2. Go to an AA meeting. You can just sit and listen. If you hear your story in other people's stories, you'll know where you can get help.

Thanks for posting. Keep coming back!

-- NM

Rusty Zipper

SA. a welcome to you...

for me, i as a that 15 day mark once...

then i found out big time, alcoholism is progressive...

made it over th 20+ a day point, and with daily blackouts ta-boot!

smokes, stil do... my lifes not unmanageable from it yet... ugh!

22NGONE

Slipping,

I subscribe to the school of thought that believes that if you are wondering if you're an alcoholic, you probably are.

As far as saying "cannot" which I saw you discussing with Least, I learned a good trick from my Sponsor that helped me a lot, so I'll share it here for anyone who needs it/cares to use it.

I had problems accepting my divorce and I said to my Sponsor I cannot accept this divorce.

He suggested that instead of saying "cannot" I try saying "I have not yet learned to"

I found it to be very helpful.

God Bless You,

John

jodyjody

I hate to admit this. But I'm a little jealous of SlippingAway. I wish I could take as many pills as I want to but still not be powerless over them.

I know, though, that I am 100% powerless over them.

I quit smoking after 15 years...no prob.

Welcome, SlippingAway. Hope you find what you're looking for here.

jodyjody

ps.

I just have to ask: If you decide that you are indeed an alcoholic....what does that mean for you? That you now have to quit?
If you decide that you are not an alcoholic, does that mean you can continue to keep drinking the way you do?
Honest question. I never want to start crap here.