tennis71

Great job Fl!

I cannot say anything that hasn't already been said above so just re-read every one else's post so I don't have to type all of that stuff.

Keep it up and I hear that day 15 is even better (although you probably know that as I just noticed the original post was yesterday!)

ThisIsTheDay

Thanks for the list. I am on day 3 and know for a fact that your # 1. = me.................. I AM an alcoholic!

jimhere

Take heed to what Rob said. An alcoholic mind can't fight the obsession. Sooner or later there is a time when there is no mental defense.
Jim

flgirl

Jim,

As I said, I have begun doing the steps with my sponsor. I understand that I am new at this, and that there are going to have to be many changes. I also think I understand that it will not happen overnight. So I guess I am confused by your statement that "Sooner or later there is a time when there is no mental defense.". I am trying really hard to change the way I am thinking. I didn't get this way in 2 weeks, and I am very sure that I am not going to have a complete "psychic change" in 2 weeks. The best I can work towards is not picking up that drink today and doing what I am being told to do, in order to be sober. Whether I am experiencing a "craving" as I called it, or a "mental obsession" as Rob called it, the way I see it, I am doing what I need to do in order to not pick up a drink.

jimhere

I'm not saying that you aren't doing what you should be doing. In fact you express a good deal of willingness. But you can't change your thinking by thinking-willingness without action is fantasy. Action is the 12 Steps. As I said, you can't fix your thinking by your thinking. A psychic change is a "new mind." The steps are the path to that new mind. In fact, if you are truly alcoholic, the mind you have will always lead you back to a drink.

As far as having no mental defense goes-an alcoholic suffers mental blank spots. All the information just doesn't show up, or if it does it is warped and pushed aside by "this time it will be different." These blank spots can show up at any time, anywhere. Most of the time we are not even aware of them when they occur. An alcoholic who is still has an alcoholic mind has no defense against these times. If you don't believe that you have an alcoholic mind, consider this: The fact you are obsessing about "not picking up that drink today" is an alcoholic obsession.
Jim

coming_clean

you just work the steps one day at a time it that's the thing for you...

Don't let anybody, especially yourself, tell u different. A thousand roads lead to Rome, and my god, it's a beautifull city

flgirl

"But you can't change your thinking by thinking-willingness without action is fantasy."

I said that I have started working the steps with my sponsor. If that is not action, I'm not too sure what is..

"An alcoholic who is still has an alcoholic mind has no defense against these times. If you don't believe that you have an alcoholic mind, consider this: The fact you are obsessing about "not picking up that drink today" is an alcoholic obsession.

At the risk of being rude, of course I still have an alcoholic mind. I am just beginning here. I understand that I am still at great risk for relapsing, and yes, I am thinking about not picking up that drink, because, at 16 days, that is what I need to do in order to stay sober until I have other tools to help me do so.

Tazman53

flgirl you are where you should be at this time, you are doing what you need to do.

flgirl

Thanks Taz,

I appreciate your support!

least

I need your strength. I want to start again at day one, but am weaning myself off the wine to avoid the horrible withdrawals. but they're still awful. i'm calling my doctor today to ask for his help. I need to stop. Please pray for me that I can find the strength to do this. I congratulate you on your two weeks. If you can do it, so can I, I just need a lot of help.:ghug2

Tazman53

least there are rooms full of people that have been where you are at right now that would love nothing more then to help you walk the path to sobriety they have already walked. They know the way, they followed that same path with the help of those who walked that path before them.

Do see the doctor, there is no greater pain an alcoholic can put them selfs through then trying to wean of the booze. In the long run detox was far less painful for me mentally then weaning..... weaning was pure hell!!!! The pain just kept going on and on and on, detox the physical part was totally over with in 5 days for me.

flgirl

Least sweetie,

I'm not so sure it's strength...more like complete willingness not to go back where I was 2 weeks ago. You just make sure to do the things you have to do to be safe and healthy. I'm praying for you honey! :praying

I apologize if it seems like I was taking offense to what Jim had to offer. I do value everyone's opinion here. One of the things I heard in the meeting I was just at was that I don't have to react to everything. I don't have to respond...that's gonna be a hard one for me, but I'm willing to do that if that is going to help me to stay sober.

jimhere

No offense taken, it may have sounded like I was telling you what to do, but I was merely sharing my experience.

Here is a prayer a friend taught me. It works at any stage of recovery:

Dear God,
Please remove this obsession that threatens my sobriety.

DSodaNow

Flgirl- Congratulations! I am so happy to hear that you are sticking with it. I relate to your thoughts a lot. The emotional side of this is tough. Thank you for sharing.

JJ43

Wow, 14 days! I hope in 12 more days I can say that! Good job! Keep remembering how good you feel physically which makes you feel good mentally. Remember the awful hangover filled with self-loathing, guilt and depression. I cannot believe how good I feel after only 2 days. I'm 43. When I drink, I feel 63. Today I feel 23!!!! :ghug3