An Artist and an Addict
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: md
Posts: 3,042
An Artist and an Addict
Hi,
I've seen a couple of artists on here talking about using when creative and I didn't want to pull up anyone in specific, but wanted to address the subject as I experienced it. For some time, one of my rationalizations was that, as an artist, I was special. After all, people say that Poe drank and took absinthe, so did Van Gogh, Twain and many others of the great masters. I convinced myself, as many other modern and ancient artists did, that the substances I took "fed my muse". I convinced myself they opened up a "higher form of consciousness." Yep, I was "different and special, thought I needed something special, and thought I had found it in drugs." I had to "suffer for my art." What BS. What I ignored is that many of them also lived miserable alcoholic sick lives and died alone and friendless from the consequences of their disease. I have to remember the thousands of artists who create from clarity, live happy fulfilled lives, have families that love them, and still make beautiful art. God, just for today, let me create art to your greater glory. Inspire me in ways that drugs never could.
kj
I've seen a couple of artists on here talking about using when creative and I didn't want to pull up anyone in specific, but wanted to address the subject as I experienced it. For some time, one of my rationalizations was that, as an artist, I was special. After all, people say that Poe drank and took absinthe, so did Van Gogh, Twain and many others of the great masters. I convinced myself, as many other modern and ancient artists did, that the substances I took "fed my muse". I convinced myself they opened up a "higher form of consciousness." Yep, I was "different and special, thought I needed something special, and thought I had found it in drugs." I had to "suffer for my art." What BS. What I ignored is that many of them also lived miserable alcoholic sick lives and died alone and friendless from the consequences of their disease. I have to remember the thousands of artists who create from clarity, live happy fulfilled lives, have families that love them, and still make beautiful art. God, just for today, let me create art to your greater glory. Inspire me in ways that drugs never could.
kj
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
While using LSD and painting I was fantastic!
Ohhh Ahhh the colors! The flourishes and secret touches.
The next morning I saw sub sandard drivel.
Ohhh Ahhh the colors! The flourishes and secret touches.
The next morning I saw sub sandard drivel.
Last edited by CarolD; 05-24-2008 at 11:50 AM. Reason: Typo
mle-sober
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Golden, CO
Posts: 1,243
kj,
I'm a painter and I can relate to what you're saying. I had the same experience as Carol - nothing I painted drunk ever looked any good in the morning. I hope you keep trying because it sounds like you are very much on the right path. Good for you.
- MLE
I'm a painter and I can relate to what you're saying. I had the same experience as Carol - nothing I painted drunk ever looked any good in the morning. I hope you keep trying because it sounds like you are very much on the right path. Good for you.
- MLE
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 9
Me and a few of my comedian friends used to get stoned all the time in the name of artistic endeavors. We'd smoke pot and come up with all these sketch comedy routines that would have us in tears. The problem was that by morning, we'd forget everything that had been so funny the night before. So one night we had this brilliant idea to record everything. It actually was brilliant, because after seeing what was so funny the next day, I never had the urge to smoke pot again.
I choose to live
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Antwerp (Belgium)
Posts: 390
I can tell u that I'm a rather good poet (ask my fans) I also have a poetical radioprogramma..And do some other creative things..Ok when drinking good things come out..But most of the time it's nonsense.. 
While writing this one I was sober
"The Climb"
Where's my nest?
Where's my nest?
Here's my nest
After the climb
There ought to be rest
Before the gold
There should be the mining
Of all that came
That I pulled to my breast
While twirling my fingers
Through the hair on their chest
This noble one is surely the best
But still we'll have to keep on climbing
© Stefanie Van deVelde 2007
While writing this one I was sober
"The Climb"
Where's my nest?
Where's my nest?
Here's my nest
After the climb
There ought to be rest
Before the gold
There should be the mining
Of all that came
That I pulled to my breast
While twirling my fingers
Through the hair on their chest
This noble one is surely the best
But still we'll have to keep on climbing
© Stefanie Van deVelde 2007
I choose to live
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Antwerp (Belgium)
Posts: 390
[QUOTE=ARIES;1782108]I can tell u that I'm a rather good poet (ask my fans) I also have a poetical radioprogramma..And do some other creative things..Ok when drinking good things come out..But most of the time it's nonsense..
I will like to add that I believe it is indeed difficult when you are an artist and you grow up in the artistic scene a lot of artist are drinking..Anyhow it's yourself who takes the booze and it also is yourself who has to say no..
Greetings from Stefanie
I will like to add that I believe it is indeed difficult when you are an artist and you grow up in the artistic scene a lot of artist are drinking..Anyhow it's yourself who takes the booze and it also is yourself who has to say no..
Greetings from Stefanie
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,772
I used to write poetry, both witty and depressing. I often wrote best when severely depressed. But when I was depressed due to the depressant alcohol I didn't want to write and couldn't type anyway when I was drunk and for sure couldn't type with a hangover or the shakes.
So now I'm clearheaded and am again thinking about writing. Had no desire or ability when I was drinking. Alcohol just destroyed my creativity.... along with everything else.
So now I'm clearheaded and am again thinking about writing. Had no desire or ability when I was drinking. Alcohol just destroyed my creativity.... along with everything else.
Evolving Addict
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: New York State
Posts: 3,067
As a kid, I had a knack for art. I won a few contests and thought I was pretty good. Then drugs began to take over my life and I lost interest. Many years later I was given the opportunity to go to college and pursue my dream of becoming an "established artist." I graduated in 1992 with a Bachelor degree in Studio Art...a "Jack-of-all-trades," so to speak. I could do it all: jewelry, photography, drawing, painting, ceramics - you name it! By 1995, when my addiction was in full gear I had sold or given away an entire body of work that took me 7 years to build (for pennies on the dollar). Looking back, I realize that much of what I created was crap, and those few extraordinary pieces I did make - the next day I couldn't remember what I did and couldn't re-create them if I wanted to. Once I got clean in 1998 I lost all interest in art and haven't picked up a brush, charcoal or camera since.
Sad, huh?
Sad, huh?
same planet...different world
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Butte, America
Posts: 10,946
kj3880
As someone else who's made/supplemented my income producing art for the better part of my life, I can agree that if you're using ... you can only go so far. Because the point will come where you are no longer using the drug to produce ... the drug is using you.
Trouble is - I've never met the 'artist' who knows where that changing point is.
I've sat around many coffee house tables listening to others dropping names of some 'great master' or the other, when a teeny bit of research proves that almost every one of them died horrific deaths or far too early in their careers due to their use of drugs.
Van Gough ate his own paint, for craps' sake!
As someone else who's made/supplemented my income producing art for the better part of my life, I can agree that if you're using ... you can only go so far. Because the point will come where you are no longer using the drug to produce ... the drug is using you.
Trouble is - I've never met the 'artist' who knows where that changing point is.
I've sat around many coffee house tables listening to others dropping names of some 'great master' or the other, when a teeny bit of research proves that almost every one of them died horrific deaths or far too early in their careers due to their use of drugs.
Van Gough ate his own paint, for craps' sake!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Starting over all over again
Posts: 4,426
I'm an artist too. Photography, poetry, jewlery, stained glass, and so on (although I suck at drawing). There was never a piece so bad that I couldn't make it look good if I had enough booze or dope in me. What's sad is that I did the same thing with friends, relationships and _me_. Given enough booze or dope, I could make a friend out of a thief, a spouse out of a barfly and a decent man out of a wino like me.
My truly best work has come when I was "high" on recovery, in touch with reality and humble about my own shortcomings.
Mike
My truly best work has come when I was "high" on recovery, in touch with reality and humble about my own shortcomings.
Mike
Member
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: my room in ct.
Posts: 58,110
as a sober muscian in recovery...
be it music, the performing arts, poetry, or art... i think this applys to all
Achieving Harmony
When a pianist learns a new piece of music, he or she does not sit down and
instantly play it perfectly. A pianist often needs to practice each hand's
work separately to learn the feel, to learn the sound. One hand picks out a
part until there is a rhythm and ease in playing what is difficult. Then,
the musician practices with the other hand, picking through the notes, one
by one, until that hand learns its tasks. When each hand has learned its
part - the sound, the feel, the rhythm, and the tones - then both hands can
play together.
During the time of practice, the music may not sound like much. It may sound
disconnected, not particularly beautiful. But when both hands are ready to
play together, music is created - a whole piece comes together in harmony
and beauty.
When we begin recovery, it may feel like we spend months, even years,
practicing individual, seemingly disconnected behaviors in the separate
parts of our life.
We take our new skills into our work, our career, and begin to apply them
slowly, making our work relationships healthier for us. We take our skills
into our relationships, sometimes one relationship at a time. We struggle
through our new behaviors in our love relationships.
One part at a time, we practice our new music note by note.
We work on our relationship with our Higher Power - our spirituality. We
work at loving ourselves. We work at believing we deserve the best. We work
on our finances. On our recreation. Sometimes on our appearance. Sometimes
on our home.
We work on feelings. On beliefs. On behaviors. Letting go of the old,
acquiring the new. We work and work and work. We practice. We struggle
through. We go from one extreme to the other, and sometimes back through the
course again. We make a little progress, go backward, and then go forward
again.
It may all seem disconnected. It may not sound like a harmonious, beautiful
piece of music - just isolated notes. Then one day, something happens. We
become ready to play with both hands, to put the music together.
What we have been working toward, note by note, becomes a song. That song is
a whole life, a complete life, and a life in harmony.
The music will come together in our life if we keep practicing the parts.
Today, I will practice my recovery behaviors through the individual parts of
my life. I trust that, one day, things will come together in a full,
complete song.
playing music clean and sober...
aint no high like it!
good wishes all!
xxoo
rz
be it music, the performing arts, poetry, or art... i think this applys to all
Achieving Harmony
When a pianist learns a new piece of music, he or she does not sit down and
instantly play it perfectly. A pianist often needs to practice each hand's
work separately to learn the feel, to learn the sound. One hand picks out a
part until there is a rhythm and ease in playing what is difficult. Then,
the musician practices with the other hand, picking through the notes, one
by one, until that hand learns its tasks. When each hand has learned its
part - the sound, the feel, the rhythm, and the tones - then both hands can
play together.
During the time of practice, the music may not sound like much. It may sound
disconnected, not particularly beautiful. But when both hands are ready to
play together, music is created - a whole piece comes together in harmony
and beauty.
When we begin recovery, it may feel like we spend months, even years,
practicing individual, seemingly disconnected behaviors in the separate
parts of our life.
We take our new skills into our work, our career, and begin to apply them
slowly, making our work relationships healthier for us. We take our skills
into our relationships, sometimes one relationship at a time. We struggle
through our new behaviors in our love relationships.
One part at a time, we practice our new music note by note.
We work on our relationship with our Higher Power - our spirituality. We
work at loving ourselves. We work at believing we deserve the best. We work
on our finances. On our recreation. Sometimes on our appearance. Sometimes
on our home.
We work on feelings. On beliefs. On behaviors. Letting go of the old,
acquiring the new. We work and work and work. We practice. We struggle
through. We go from one extreme to the other, and sometimes back through the
course again. We make a little progress, go backward, and then go forward
again.
It may all seem disconnected. It may not sound like a harmonious, beautiful
piece of music - just isolated notes. Then one day, something happens. We
become ready to play with both hands, to put the music together.
What we have been working toward, note by note, becomes a song. That song is
a whole life, a complete life, and a life in harmony.
The music will come together in our life if we keep practicing the parts.
Today, I will practice my recovery behaviors through the individual parts of
my life. I trust that, one day, things will come together in a full,
complete song.
playing music clean and sober...
aint no high like it!
good wishes all!
xxoo
rz
I choose to live
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Antwerp (Belgium)
Posts: 390
I will like to add that I believe it is indeed difficult when you are an artist and you grow up in the artistic scene a lot of artist are drinking..Anyhow it's yourself who takes the booze and it also is yourself who has to say no.. Greetings from Stefanie[/QUOTE]
Yeah I wrote that today too in another post..I myself don't want to drink or blow nomore..There's so much more in life I think
Greetings from Stefanie[/QUOTE]Yeah I wrote that today too in another post..I myself don't want to drink or blow nomore..There's so much more in life I think
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
I wrote some great songs when I was stoned...did some great vocal performances drunk too.
Then, after a long 'bad patch' which I was sure would 'come good', as I got worse and worse at my craft - I stopped. For 10 years. Nothing.
Now I'm writing great songs and performing well again - sober.
LOL apologies for the lack of humility but it gets my point across - now, in my dotage, I finally see that drugs and booze never wrote anything - they never made anything out of what wasn't there in the first place
Then, after a long 'bad patch' which I was sure would 'come good', as I got worse and worse at my craft - I stopped. For 10 years. Nothing.
Now I'm writing great songs and performing well again - sober.
LOL apologies for the lack of humility but it gets my point across - now, in my dotage, I finally see that drugs and booze never wrote anything - they never made anything out of what wasn't there in the first place
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