ken67

No need to steal it, you can have it....better yet, try living it!!!

See the Spiritual acts in all things, and although God is my Highest Power, he doesn't haven't an exclusive.

Honu

Katecan, isn't this something? I just received this email from my Pastor! I thought you might like it.

"We live in a world that believes we can purchase security with our money. Most American's place their faith in their 401K. So, it is not surprising when the stock and housing market wobble on their foundations that our anxiety levels and our blood pressure begin to climb. If this describes you, I have good news. God is in charge and He will not be slowed by the economy. Read the following words and see if the truths in these words might give you a new sense of security.
1 Chronicles 29:11-12 - "Everything in the Heavens and on Earth are yours,
Oh Lord, and this is your kingdom. We adore you as being in control of
everything. Riches and honor come from you alone and you are the ruler of
all mankind; your hand controls power and might and it is at your discretion
that men are made great and given strength." (TLB)"

Honu

tennis71

Sorry about the relapse, I have been there and the beating I gave myself was horrendous.

I would suggest a couple of things that may enlighten you - 1st, you have been posting an average of 2 times a day here. Read your posts and see if you notice any changes in attitude or feelings. Use SR as your journal to gain some insight into what you were thinking about between when you joined and today. Relapse is not typically just the seconds before you drink, at least for me, relapse starts a few days or a week before I pick up.

2nd - Repeat the Serenity Prayer at least 1 time in the morning and 1 time before you go to bed. For me, this helps me really start to focus on myself and what I can change. It also encourages me to avoid using things that I have absolutely nothing to do with as an excuse to drink.

If you don't know the Serenity Prayer - "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."

Keep coming back, stay sober and I am sure you will see better stuff tomorrow!

Hevyn

Great advice from everyone, as usual. I think sometimes the urge comes out of nowhere, even when drinking hasn't been on our mind at all. Maybe we feel over-confident because we think we're winning the fight, and let our guard down. I guess that's why AA (or other programs) are helpful, because they constantly remind us to be wary & on guard. I don't participate in anything like that, probably should. I"m at almost 4 months sober, & I try to remind myself every day of the wreckage I've left behind me by drinking and the long, hard uphill battle it is to "come back" time and time again. I don't have it in me anymore, and I'm glad of that. I do regret not coming to this realization earlier, though. It took looking death in the eye to convince me drinking was no longer an option. Praying for you Katecan, and for Least in Ohio, and all our other dear friends on SR who are struggling today. I'm well aware that tomorrow, it could be me.

mle-sober

Katecan,

I'm so sorry for your struggle. I hope you are finding some measure of peace and finding your way back to the path of recovery. I don't know if you've done much hiking or walking in rural areas - but sometimes when you're following a path, you look up and realize suddenly, that you've lost the path. And you just retrace your steps and find it again. You need to just get back on that path you were on. And then step forward again. You can do it. I am praying for you.

Love, MLE

Surlyredhead

Give yourself a break, it is so easy to beat ourselves up and it is so hard to forgive ourselves for being human..never quit quitting!!

Cathy

vashti45

Katecan, echoing a lot of the others here, don't give in to the temptation to beat yourself up. It is not constructive. Do think about what led up to the relapse, and what you can do, think and feel differently.

You mentioned that you need more in your life. Have you tried asking your God to guide you to find what more you should be doing to be of service? A job, a service commitment in AA, volunteering ... what are your skills? From your posts I can tell that you have a lot to offer. Relapse can be part of recovery, although I know from bitter experience that it's hard.

Peace,

Jana:praying

Katecan

Hi, Just wanted to let you all know I'm ok. Thank you for all the posts of support. I'm back at my recovery since Saturday morning and have examined why I fell, what led to it. I've got to step back and not take on so much so early. Next time I will come before I pick up, give myself a chance to not do it and get more honest.

Much Love,

Kathy

vashti45

Kathy--keep up the good work! It sounds like you're focusing well on getting better. Thanks for the update and for your honesty.:praying

Jana

dave47

Glad you are back on track Kathy,
in my prayers.