Drank again
 

Morning all,

I'm having a rough time of it today. What I've been doing lately is managing to stay sober one day and then drinking the next. Yesterday happened to be the one I drank. Pretty much a total blackout...well I remember just enough to wonder how much damage I caused. I have a pretty serious problem here with drinking and I can't seem to get stopped. I've done it before, but today it seems like an insurmountable problem. If I had the option of climbing back inside a bottle right now I most likely would and I tell you it isn't what I want. I want to quit so badly. I just keep doing the same **** over and over again. Thanks for letting me vent.

I had the same problem. After over a month sober I blew it and drank. Now in withdrawals and trying to ride it out. You CAN quit drinking, so can I. Just don't drink just for today. And take it one day at a time.:ghug

Hi ScoobaSteve, I was in the exact same position as you a few months back. The same never ending circle over and over again. :(

Don't worry, there is hope and an escape route.

Have you seen your doctor? You should get an appointment to see him as quick as you can and spill the beans on your problem.

Welcome to SR. :wave:

Hi Steve,

It's the insanity of the disease of alcoholism that you're experiencing.

Stay sober, minute by minute and get through the day and then focus on the next day. You can do this. I didn't think I could manage it either. There is lots of support here, so keep posting.

Thanks Least and RK2007. Not drinking today is something I am committed to. I by happenstance have an appointment with a new doctor today and plan on having a talk with him about it.

Good to see the slip-up hasn't made you throw in the towel. Don't drink today. Keep that focus. We can all do it.

The early days of sobriety are tough but it does get easier.

Have you considered seeking help though treatment or support groups? I found that I could not do it alone even when I wanted to quit.

:SteprobL:

My plan is to attend AA. It's worked for me before. I had a few years sober some time back, but I picked up about 5 years ago and haven't stayed sober for much of any length of time since then

Good Plan, Scooba! Do whatever it takes! I can tell you, I tried for several weeks to get through a DAY without a drink when I finally managed to string one, two, three, thirty-five of them together....if you can do one, then just try having a do-over the next day, and take it literally one day at a time. It's funny how simple that sounds compared to forever! The important thing is that you WANT to not drink, and if you do whatever it takes, you'll be able to!
:You_Rock_

Karen

9 days. That was the longest I've ever been able to stay sober on my own. Once I got support, it got easier and longer. We can't do it on our own. Support from others who know the way was the answer for me.

You said it all right there, the definition of insanity: Doing the same things over and over again and expecting different results. I did that for over half my life too.

My plan is to attend AA. It's worked for me before.

So what's stopping you from going today, right now, and picking up that 24 hour chip?

AA works for me every day Steve, I need the program and the Steps on a daily basis for my sobriety. I hope you make it back there, it's much easier than what you're doing now.

Hi Steve,

I remember how very painful quitting was...I couldn't put two weeks together...I found myself crying through the cravings...

What helped me is that I knew I had one other option if I drank...This option scared me more than anything because I wasn't ready to die yet...After institutions, arrest and jails, I decided enough...It wasn't easy...I latched on to all the support I could, attended AA meetings, and believed I could do this...

It has been ten months...You can do this too...

Thinking of you...:ghug3

recovery is possible. hang in there. hugs, k

I went and saw the doc today, was real straight about what I have been doing and what I intend to do about it. He was very up beat and supportive. He wants me to take a benzo for the next few days as needed....I guess they help with the shakes and should help my already high BP from getting worse. I've never been a big fan of the idea of taking a drug to help counteract the side effects from withdrawl from another drug, but I suppose I'll just do what the doc tells me. Take the pills for the shakes, dont drink and get myself to a meeting.

Hey Scooba,

It sounds like you're on the right path. We all know how hard it is, and especially at first. It's the toughest thing I've ever done in my life. And I've led a pretty strange life with quite a few tough obstacles.

When I was first getting sober, I absolutely was not able to do it on my own. I'm not saying you're not. Just that I wasn't. I found that what switched things around for me was 1) prayer, 2) an outpatient program, 3) AA and 4) coming clean with my family. All of those combined, pretty much on the same day, made my sobriety "stick." That's what it felt like. It didn't make it easy by any means. But it made it possible. For all my trying and trying and trying, I couldn't do it before I combined all of those elements.

I'm glad you're here and that you are sober today. That counts.

- MLE

Great job on being straight with your doctor. The pills will help, hopefully.
Just don't drink today.

Best wishes,

Ghost

Sounds like an excellent plan!!!!

You know the BB says it all:

I fought it for 10 years and the whole time it turned out that the "easier softer way" was AA! I am not alone in this, I see so many doing just like I did, fighting so hard and so long to do it "My Way" because it seems to be the "easier softer way".

There are those who do it their way, but they are few and far between.

Glad to hear you are going back to what worked for you before.