ImJulie

I was thinking today....
I was thinking about all the things I "needed" drugs and booze for, to give me the confidence to do em.
Do any of you have things you've always wanted to do, but addiction got in the way? Or things you would only do while intoxicated, yet would like to do sober?

I love to sing. ~~blush~~
I "think" maybe Im not a bad singer.
I have friends who are in a band, and any time they came to town...I'd go to the bar where they played, get sh!tfaced, and get on stage with them.
Im so freeking shy and lacking in self-esteem, that I felt I had to have something in my system to give me the guts to get up there. But when I got up there....I loved it.

Sobriety is meant to give me my life back...or give me a new life. Im gonna take singing lessons.

kmill

Julie, I used to be in a band and have sung and played with quite a few over the years. Love kareoke too. But I do know that i perform much better sober than drunk. If you loved it drunk, imagine the thrill of doing it sober when you can really feel it all.

ImJulie

C'mon guys! Tell me your hopes and dreams!
Anyone out there that wants to write a book? Go back to college? Get a motorcycle? Feed the homeless? Start a new business?
The list is endless.....and guess what?
We can do all those things in sobriety. All those things and more!

kmill

I do intend to start a new business. I've had the plan for a long time but the hangovers etc have always stopped my enthusiasm. I want to start drawing again and get some cartoons published. I want to actually use my gym and get fit.
I really want to do something for charity, actually give instead of taking away. Like run a marathon, or coach soccer or rugby.

I am really trying to focus on all the possibilties ahead and it keeps me very optimistic.

Astro

I got my motorcycle, and a home for my children and I, and I started hiking and camping again. I started dating at two years sober and met a beautiful woman who works her own recovery program and does it amazingly well. I'm living my dream Julie, each day in recovery is a gift from God, how I choose to use it is my gift to Him.

There are still many places I want to travel to, and eventually I'd like to find a peaceful and beautiful place to retire. I'll get there one day at a time, assuming I stay clean and sober of course.

Tazman53

You know Julie I am living my hopes and dreams for today, my family loves me and respects me. I am invited to family functions today, I babysit my grandchildren, I drive and enjoy the view rather then constantly scanning for cops. I wake up in the morning I feel good, my head is clear as well as my conscience. I do things with the family all the time.

You know to look at what I do on a daily basis does not look that exciting, even to me, but in reality I am free today to do anything I want to do when ever I want to.

I do plan to retire in the next few years and my plans have changed for my retirement, originally my plans were to drink myself into oblivion every day until I kicked the bucket! Now I plan to fish and hunt on a nice piece of property and have my grandchildren spend the summers with us.

ImJulie

You know to look at what I do on a daily basis does not look that exciting, even to me, but in reality I am free today to do anything I want to do when ever I want to.

One of the things I am kinda figuring out in sobriety, is that my hopes, dreams, aspirations no longer have to be "exciting". They can be whatever I want them to be...boring to some, is serenity to others.

And I forgot about fishing until you wrote that! I used to love fishing.
I betcha Im safe these days to carry around a pole with a hook on the end of it.
I dont even need any money or anything to go fishing! My dad still has my pole he bought me as a teen.
Thanks dude......this chick might just go fishing this weekend!:ghug3

Hope

Wow, this thread is inspiring!

Now that I'm sober, I can finish college. I couldn't finish before because I was drinking all the time and never going to class. Now I was given a second chance and I have my brain back. Now I can learn, grow, and discover the world around me.

I was also thinking of writing a book one day. But I don't know yet... I'll have to see how that goes.

I also want to start running again. I used to be a runner until addiction took over and I lost interest in it. Now I'm inspired to start again.

tkdan

Actually it sounds like an awsome way to spend your sobriety. I believe the important thing is not what we do or don't do, but that we are happy, joyous, and free in our sobriety.
Yes to the book!
No to college!
I have a motorcycle!
I feed homeless animals from time to time: does this count?
No to the business!
I do however want to start teaching karate as soon as I get my black belt!
Of all the above I would say writing a book is something I have always wanted to do.
Awsome thread Julie

adore79

Id really like to start working again, this time at a job that I like. Also, get an apartment. And not screw it all up this time lol.

Jomey

Great thread Julie!

Today I taught my three sons how to shoe a horse. As a matter a fact, we just came back in from the barn. You should have seen their faces when Mama got on her farrier chaps, fired up the torch, hammered out the shoe, trimmed the hoof and hammered that sucker on there! Would I have dared to do that while drinking? NO WAY!!! Too much danger, no ambition, etc. When the littlest one asked me "Mama where did you learn to do THAT?" I told him his great-granddaddy taught me.

And that is when it hit me. I have no "grand plans" for sobriety...other than to be the person God made me...to be a good wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend, woman...I am going to pass on my few small talents and the country wisdom I have somehow managed to acquire from their ancestors to my boys...I will NOT let our rural way of life die out with me because I am too busy drinking to remember, bother, care to pass it on. I WILL LIVE! SOBER!

I will live, I will walk with God and my family, and surely, that is much more than this drunk could have ever imagined.

mle-sober

Huh. This one made me think. I'm not just saying this to be sentimental:

I think the biggest thing that drinking prevented me from doing was being a good mom and wife. I was always faking that. And running behind on everything. Trying to act like I was up on all the school projects, dentist appts, and sleep overs - like I remembered what my husband had told me 3 days ago... Everything was an act. All I was trying to do was get through those moments so that I could get to the point when I could drink.

So, I'd like to give my family the love and attention they deserve. I'd like to be honest and real with my husband and let him know what's really going on for me instead of hiding and lying all the time. I'd like to earn his trust.

The rest of my life is fine. It's my own family I messed up with my drinking. How dumb is that?

a fallen man

julie, my hopes and dreams are to be the man i once was. if you read my post named 15 days you will see all of the things i've accomplished sober. i had let so many things just slide it was pathetic.

plus keeping busy has been great for me. i used to just come home, hit the vodka and veg on the sofa until i passed out. pretty embarrassing for my sons when their friends spent the night.

i have many plain mundane plans like working on my house this summer and fixing things i've let slide while i was inside my vodka bottle.

i hope all of your dreams come true. they will if you vote for pedro. that is a joke that some will get and some will say a fallen man is not only an alky he's loco too.

love you all,

david.

Freedom1990

Actually I'm starting college this summer to finally finish up and graduate with a double degree. Next is finding another project sportster to fix up the way I like it! :bounce

Zanthos

Great thread, everyone. And really sweet sentiments Julie. But if all I do for the rest of my life is stay sober, I'll count myself fortunate.

Since embarking on recovery, I have started a business and got into offroad motorcycling and motorcycle mechanics.

I have all sorts of hopes and dreams. I'd love to write a couple of books. I'd love to go back to college. I already have a B.A. and a J.D., but I might like to get an undergraduate degree in anthropology or archeology and stay with it through a PhD. I might like to do field work in anthropology or archeology. And learn multiple languages. I'll be really old by the time I get to do this (if I get to do this), but recovery has taught me that one is never too old to do something new.

I also want to start singing again. I used to sing with classical choral groups back East, and I love choral music very much. One of the local universities has a choral group that accepts singers from the community, so I may audition this summer. And if not then, maybe someday.

However, with all that's happened and with all my hopes and dreams, I need to be very very careful to keep letting Life and my Higher Power continue to guide me. I do not direct my life anymore. (As it turns out, I never did; I just kept trying to.) I live one day at a time and I get to see and enjoy the way Life unfolds.

It would be easy for me to start planning and living in or for the future. That would be dangerous, if not fatal, to my recovery. So whatever my plans, whatever my desires, I'm not going to be attached to any particular outcome.

And if you are in your first weeks or months of recovery, in my opinion you are better off not thinking of the future at all. Not for now. Give things a couple of years. Learn to accept everything just the way it is! Focus on developing a healthy ego, which takes a lot of time. Don't worry -- life is long! There will be plenty of time to do whatever Life has in store for you!

Wizard

I've already started a new business. It's starting to get off its feet, however, needs a lot of my attention. If I can just stop drinking all the time maybe it would get the attention that it needs.

Oh, and I want to lose 15 pounds.

drukore

In the last two years I have done what I couldn't get done while getting high/drunk....

I'm now releasing music I love producing on two labels.
I'm submerged in a lifestyle of fitness where I'm actually healthy 100% of the time and not trying to compensate for the damage I did the night before, seeing all sorts of progress in getting my body looking and feeling the way I want.
I have a relationship with my family that is stronger than it ever was.
I was able to have my grandfather see me clean and clear-eyed before the Altz's disease took his life.

But really....after a good 2+ years clean, you know what I've found:

There is nothing I can't enjoy, if I choose to be open to enjoying it. I don't need to be drunk to enjoy a movie, sex, music, concerts, the park, the beach, vacations, family outings, quite nights at home, having coffee with friends, etc. I could go on but you know what I mean by all this......

Being sober means being free of a shackle that keeps you chained to a wall of "I would follow a dream, but...."

You can do whatever your heart desires, and you can be CLEAR about what that desire is and the motivation behind it. Congrats on having a dream and ZERO fear about following it, regardless of the outcome. That is what it means to be free.