StandFast

I am romanticing and thinking of going back out under the guise of just going out w/o any intention of picking up.

why would I do that? What would be the point?

I am so bored (althought I am keeping very busy with meetings), and I want to go out but I know that I shouldn't (at least not w/o another non-drinker).


The summer is coming and that is my favorit time to pick up? Any suggestions are welcome!!!1

Single, sober, living in the burbs....

Change4life

Instead of romanticizing your drinking focus more on the problems it causes you. When I want to use I suddenly put all the crap Ive been through in a locked vault in the archives of my mind and then I fall.

remember how you felt when you were using, ask yourself why you quit in the first place.
Delay delay. I felt like using the other day, but I forced myself to do something else and eventually the cravings went away. My old normal response would have been to run out right away as soon as I felt the urge. Didnt get to far with that method.

Keep yourself busy

Anna

Yes, I have plenty of bad memories to reflect on and that does help to keep me in the present moment.

I have also found that doing things for others, volunteering, really helps me to get outside of myself and my thoughts.

tennis71

Suggestions;
-talk about this in a meeting. Not only will you learn what others experienced when they went out again, you should gain support from your immediate peers in AA
-Keep it simple and don't worry about the summer
-Think about where you are at in your sobriety before you go to bed and plan your day of sobriety when you wake up

I will leave it at that as I am sure there will be more and better ideas to come in this string.

mle-sober

Remember that alcohol is poison to your system. Every time I pass one of my drinking places and I feel a little twinge I say to myself, "Poison. That is poison to you."

Remember how horrible it felt to be back to counting one day sobor, two days sobor, etc. That first two weeks was so miserable and filled with shame and sorrow for me that I never, ever want to do it again. There was nothing romantic about it. I was a mess, I was shakey and I was totally filled with a kind of spiritual pain that I never want to experience again.

Tell every one you know who supports you in your recovery and ask them to help you again. Tell them you are are finding yourself tempted and that you need help.

Stop carrying cash. I don't know if you have a spouse but my spouse checks my credit card receipts at my request.

Journal your feelings and read any older journals from when you first got sober.

Pray. Ask God for help staying sober. Ask him every single time the thought of drinking again. Thank him for the sobriety you have.

Distract yourself with fun things like a movie or a good book or a bit of shopping. A pedicure. A massage.

Give yourself love and support for not picking up. You can do it.

1963comet

Very good question to ask. Plus you are thinking about it before you act. That is progress to me.

It does get worse if you pick up again. It is almost like you never quit. I picked up after a year and it was no time before I was drinking double.

I know we are to live one day at a time but I know I cannot ever drink. The sooner I excepted that the better. But this is how I have to look at it. Plus I have Way to many bad memories to keep myself in check.

It will never change, if I use I will chalk up more problems. My life has been great for so long I do not even want to go back.

mle-sober

I thought of another one while I was out walking. Exercise. Getting into the habit of walking can really help. I can't do real strenuous exercise and I've never been a big sports kind of person. But just walking really helps me. I put on my music and I walk and sometimes I pray and mostly I just look out at the trees and the lake and the beauty of what is around me.

I don't know why I didn't mention it in my first post. I think exercise is my biggest activity that helps me keep focused on staying sober. Well, that and prayer.

All my best to you. Like 1963comet said, you are thinking prior to picking up and that's so good. But now you have no excuse. You can't lie to yourself. If you did go back out, you would have only yourself to blame and no excuse at all. And self pity only feels good for a very short period of time. I know.

FightingIrish

I go back and read my step one. I also have little mental "post-its" from my step one that I can grab on to (e.g., waking up in my own urine every day for four years) when I start romanticizing the drink (e.g., all those elegant cocktail parties...that I never went to.)

Sorry if TMI, but it's what helps me.

CAPTAINZING2000

I don't entertain the thought of it!!

Aysha

I agree with change4life....also I have found that reading my old posts from when I first came here really knock those cravings out.
What a train wreck I was.

BUTTERFLY-7

I Set My Self Up, by entertaining the though, or the feeling is like playing with the devil it self. A

Dean62

It's normal to romanticize your next drink. Realize Standfast what you are actually thinking is you can control your drinking. That "peculiar mental twist" is the great obsession of every alcoholic. Don't give in to that delusion. Think about the reality of the next day. The only thing you will be thinking about will be your next drink. Alcohol will once again be more important then everything that is important to you today. It will get worse, if your not satisfied with your bottom there is a better one just waiting for you and StandFast, we are not getting any younger. I'm 45 myself.

Start your day with a prayer. Ask and ye shall receive, ask for sobriety today. Then romanticize about the gift of all the beautiful things God has planned for you today.