4 days .... finally quit drinking
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 37
4 days .... finally quit drinking
Hi I am new here and I quit drinking 4 days ago. finally
I am the kind of drinker who drinks not every day just every 3-4 days. When I drink I drink app 15 bottles of beer an evening.
I have been feeling guilty for my wife and 3 children as I feel I am not there for them when I am hungover.....hurts. My job suffers from it and my health is crap as well...
I have been drinking in this pattern for the last 16 years. I am 32 years old (yes in Holland you can drink from the age of 16).
All my friends still drink and they call me crazy and really dont understand why I should want to quit. When I told them last Saturday that I quit drinking they just lauched and said I would not make it 1 week (normally I dont make it). They also said not to tell my wife I quit so that she doesn't get mad when I do go drinking.... They did try to make me feel better by saying that they would be really proud of me if I could drink only once a week yeah right..
The next day I already got a message from one of them asking me to have a beer with him.....wtf
So I came to the conclusion that my friends are actually just drinking buddies real friends wouldn't do that...
I told all of them to leave me alone for the next 3 weeks to give me a chance to fight of the first of many battles with alcohol. Havent heard from them since..
I know from earlier experiences that day 1-2 for me are easy day 3-4 there starts a little restlesness and this grows in a big energy ball in my stomach that grows untill I convince myself I dont have a problem I am normal it was just a guys night out and just drink..... probably day 5-6.....
I have already found a few stories here that confrim my drinking pattern and it is really nice to see all the other stories.. I have gained a lot of strength from them..
To keep myself busy I have cancelled all appointment in the evenings and I will stay home untill all kids are asleep. Then I go to my garage and work on my cars. The last few days this helped a lot but now it is getting much harder to concentrate or find the patience to do things nicely..
I will be checking in every day for sure because writing about it has made me feel a lot better
THANKS A LOT FOR JUST BEING HERE YOU CHANGED MY LIFE.
Vinnie
I am the kind of drinker who drinks not every day just every 3-4 days. When I drink I drink app 15 bottles of beer an evening.
I have been feeling guilty for my wife and 3 children as I feel I am not there for them when I am hungover.....hurts. My job suffers from it and my health is crap as well...
I have been drinking in this pattern for the last 16 years. I am 32 years old (yes in Holland you can drink from the age of 16).
All my friends still drink and they call me crazy and really dont understand why I should want to quit. When I told them last Saturday that I quit drinking they just lauched and said I would not make it 1 week (normally I dont make it). They also said not to tell my wife I quit so that she doesn't get mad when I do go drinking.... They did try to make me feel better by saying that they would be really proud of me if I could drink only once a week yeah right..
The next day I already got a message from one of them asking me to have a beer with him.....wtf
So I came to the conclusion that my friends are actually just drinking buddies real friends wouldn't do that...
I told all of them to leave me alone for the next 3 weeks to give me a chance to fight of the first of many battles with alcohol. Havent heard from them since..
I know from earlier experiences that day 1-2 for me are easy day 3-4 there starts a little restlesness and this grows in a big energy ball in my stomach that grows untill I convince myself I dont have a problem I am normal it was just a guys night out and just drink..... probably day 5-6.....
I have already found a few stories here that confrim my drinking pattern and it is really nice to see all the other stories.. I have gained a lot of strength from them..
To keep myself busy I have cancelled all appointment in the evenings and I will stay home untill all kids are asleep. Then I go to my garage and work on my cars. The last few days this helped a lot but now it is getting much harder to concentrate or find the patience to do things nicely..
I will be checking in every day for sure because writing about it has made me feel a lot better
THANKS A LOT FOR JUST BEING HERE YOU CHANGED MY LIFE.
Vinnie
Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Europe
Posts: 1,361
heya Vinnie,
I made the mistake of doing my first reply in Dutch, so that one is not here anymore.
I've read your post and a lot of the symptons you describe sound familiar altough alcohol is not my favorite drug (weed is). Especially the stress-knot in the stomach, always thought I was the only one that had those symptons.
You first have to take care for yourself, and let ur drinking buddies be.
good work, and keep on truckin'
I made the mistake of doing my first reply in Dutch, so that one is not here anymore.
I've read your post and a lot of the symptons you describe sound familiar altough alcohol is not my favorite drug (weed is). Especially the stress-knot in the stomach, always thought I was the only one that had those symptons.
You first have to take care for yourself, and let ur drinking buddies be.
good work, and keep on truckin'
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: South Africa, Pretoria
Posts: 126
Hey Vinnie,
Congrats!
I'm also new to the site - not as an addict, but as the family of an alcoholic...
This might sound cruel, but if you ever get to those days where you feel like you can't last and you need some encouragement, just read what families and friends of alcoholics say and feel. (My dad has - when he's tried - said that our thoughts and feelings helped him stay sober)
This is what your family goes through all the time (and it can get really bad)
I thought I was alone, but like you, this site has shown me there are people out there that understand.
Just keep at it! You gotten this far, it's better than most can say.
Good luck!
Congrats!
I'm also new to the site - not as an addict, but as the family of an alcoholic...
This might sound cruel, but if you ever get to those days where you feel like you can't last and you need some encouragement, just read what families and friends of alcoholics say and feel. (My dad has - when he's tried - said that our thoughts and feelings helped him stay sober)
This is what your family goes through all the time (and it can get really bad)
I thought I was alone, but like you, this site has shown me there are people out there that understand.
Just keep at it! You gotten this far, it's better than most can say.
Good luck!
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Welcome to SR Vinnie, congrats on the 4 days sober, if you find that what you are doing right now is not enough keep adding new things to help you stay stopped, I found that in order to stay stopped I had to become willing to do what ever it took to stay sober. For me in order to stay sober I had to work the program of AA. Try a program if it gets really rough, AA is not the only one out there, try them all and keep on trying, as long as you keep on trying you can not fail!!!
You may slip, but you will not fail as long as you keep on working doing what ever you need to do to stay sober.
You may slip, but you will not fail as long as you keep on working doing what ever you need to do to stay sober.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 37
thanks all..... ABout the AA it is not that common in Holland, furthermore it is at least 1 hour drive from my home so that virtually impossible. I still havent told my wife I quit drinking. I dont want to get her down by not making it again.... breaks her heart... So no chance to go to AA at this time
Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 55
I am still amazed at how much we alcoholics think alike. I get myself into the same patterns of thinking with my drinking too--after going so many days without, I convince myself that I'm fine and I'm allowed to drink. And I always regret it when I do. Normal people don't regret drinking every single time they do it, because normal people know how to drink normally! Congratulations on your choice to be sober. Sorry about your 'drinkin' buddies'. I feel thats what most of my friends are too. Stay strong, you can do it!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 37
timeforchange thanks man...... It really helps me fight normality when I hear of other people minds playing the same tricks I hope you can to.... As far as my drinking buddies go I think 1 of them will be signing up as well in the near future the rest I still havent heard from at all but I am to busy not drinking anyway
Member
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Littleton, Co.
Posts: 3,317
Vinnie,
Congrats on 4 days, that is so awesome!!! Drinking buddies are sometimes just that, "DRINKING" buddies. Try not to look to far ahead, do what you need to do for you today. Working on cars sounds like a great thingto do.
Congrats on 4 days, that is so awesome!!! Drinking buddies are sometimes just that, "DRINKING" buddies. Try not to look to far ahead, do what you need to do for you today. Working on cars sounds like a great thingto do.
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
viinie AA & other programs have online meetings you can participate in, it is not the same as face to face meetings, but it is better then nothing, as a matter of factif your friend is serious about quitting the 2 of you could form a group and meet in your home.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Redondo Beach, CA
Posts: 55
4th day here too....
Vinnie,
I have the exact same issues as you. I have not told my wife that I have stopped drinking becasue I don't want to let her down. I haven't told my "buddies" yet. However, my buddies have been my friends since we were 4 and 10 years old. We have a lot of history, but over the last few years it's been to play cards, go to a Laker game, go to a heavy metal show and of course drink beers at those events (a lot of beers). I drank about 4-5 times a week, many times while driving (I am an idiot, I know!). I felt like I wanted to get caught so that I could stop drinking. Alcohol insanity right? Anyways, I usually get antsy about this time (day 4) and usually give in after 6 or 7 days. I'm normal, I can drink, after all, we're playing cards tonight. This is not rational thoughts. This is my disease speaking to me. I'm going to a meeting Thursday, and I'm planning on talking with my wife tonight, or tomorrow (I've been saying this for 4 days now!). I feel that is going to be the toughest for me. I saw your other post asking if you should tell your wife. I'm going to go read that now. This board has helped me beyond words. I feel like drinking, so I read a post, or respond to one. It feels so good.... A cleansing of sorts?
I have the exact same issues as you. I have not told my wife that I have stopped drinking becasue I don't want to let her down. I haven't told my "buddies" yet. However, my buddies have been my friends since we were 4 and 10 years old. We have a lot of history, but over the last few years it's been to play cards, go to a Laker game, go to a heavy metal show and of course drink beers at those events (a lot of beers). I drank about 4-5 times a week, many times while driving (I am an idiot, I know!). I felt like I wanted to get caught so that I could stop drinking. Alcohol insanity right? Anyways, I usually get antsy about this time (day 4) and usually give in after 6 or 7 days. I'm normal, I can drink, after all, we're playing cards tonight. This is not rational thoughts. This is my disease speaking to me. I'm going to a meeting Thursday, and I'm planning on talking with my wife tonight, or tomorrow (I've been saying this for 4 days now!). I feel that is going to be the toughest for me. I saw your other post asking if you should tell your wife. I'm going to go read that now. This board has helped me beyond words. I feel like drinking, so I read a post, or respond to one. It feels so good.... A cleansing of sorts?
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: N. tonawnda ny
Posts: 2
Originally Posted by timeforchange 
I am still amazed at how much we alcoholics think alike. I get myself into the same patterns of thinking with my drinking too--after going so many days without, I convince myself that I'm fine and I'm allowed to drink. And I always regret it when I do. Normal people don't regret drinking every single time they do it, because normal people know how to drink normally! Congratulations on your choice to be sober. Sorry about your 'drinkin' buddies'. I feel thats what most of my friends are too. Stay strong, you can do it!
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