let's try this again...
-Samantha
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Georgia
Posts: 16
let's try this again...
well, since i initally introduced myself a couple of weeks ago i have succeeded in doing the exact opposite of what i intended too. lots more drinking, lots more drugs. i always felt bad about it and every day i know its something that i have to quit in order to move on with my life. i just feel so STUCK like there isn't even a starting point to start repairing the damage i have caused to my life. i have nothing and i am very, very close to having no one. ugh. i'm over it!!!
Life the gift of recovery!
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Home is where the heart is
Posts: 7,061
Glad you have decided to start over again. As long as one keeps getting up and trying again there is always hope that things can get better and one can succeed with sobriety.
Just some thoughts here that might help.
Have you considered trying a program of recovery? There are many out there. They range from AA to ZZ (not that is not a recovery program that I know of but it is to make a point that AA is not the only way). Personally AA is the program that worked for me. But there are many here who have succeeded in sobriety with other programs of recovery. If you are interested in trying one there is a list under the stickies on the top of the alcoholism forum page. Definately worth checking out.
Remember "if you don't drink you don't get drunk"
Life does change once we get sober, there is the opportunity to repair the damage and chaos we created while in our disease. Don't give up because things are tough right now. They may even continue to be tough for some time even after you get sober. Don't worry or stress about it though. Put it in perspective "it took many years to create the damage and chaos so it may time considerable time to clean it all up". It is well worth it though, the peace of mind, the releasing of the guilt, shame, and resentments that are so much a part of active alcoholism.
You can do this. There is hope. Look around here at SR, there are many examples of people who have beaten this problem and found sobriety.
Good luck to you and please keep us posted on your progress.
Just some thoughts here that might help.
Have you considered trying a program of recovery? There are many out there. They range from AA to ZZ (not that is not a recovery program that I know of but it is to make a point that AA is not the only way). Personally AA is the program that worked for me. But there are many here who have succeeded in sobriety with other programs of recovery. If you are interested in trying one there is a list under the stickies on the top of the alcoholism forum page. Definately worth checking out.
Remember "if you don't drink you don't get drunk"
Life does change once we get sober, there is the opportunity to repair the damage and chaos we created while in our disease. Don't give up because things are tough right now. They may even continue to be tough for some time even after you get sober. Don't worry or stress about it though. Put it in perspective "it took many years to create the damage and chaos so it may time considerable time to clean it all up". It is well worth it though, the peace of mind, the releasing of the guilt, shame, and resentments that are so much a part of active alcoholism.
You can do this. There is hope. Look around here at SR, there are many examples of people who have beaten this problem and found sobriety.
Good luck to you and please keep us posted on your progress.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Portland, or
Posts: 47
Hi, I know, been there over and over, once again this is my second day sober. After having losing my job last July I started drinking again. Well, it took me down fast as I was also taking anti-depressants that did not mix with alcohol, my drinking took off in a whole different direction and it was incredibly frightening. I am at home all day on my own and after many times of saying "I will never do it again", I did. I contacted my doctor and he has prescribed Antabuse, I took my first one yesterday. I need a break from drinking in order to clear my head, I find that I cannot do that if I have been on a binge/recovery ride. Once I start to feel better after a couple of days I am off on my drinking escapades yet again. I am not suggesting that you take Antabuse, however, it is a good way to get a kick-start in recovery. If you drink on Antabuse it makes you incredibly sick, or, it will kill you. Hey, good luck.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Michigan
Posts: 1,381
Hey if you stick around here you can make new friends.
As far as damage control, please try not to look at the Big picture. My life was a mess when I stopped. But everything has worked out. It was not fixed over night. So many of my problems just stopped when I quit. Because I was not adding new problems that drinking caused.
As far as damage control, please try not to look at the Big picture. My life was a mess when I stopped. But everything has worked out. It was not fixed over night. So many of my problems just stopped when I quit. Because I was not adding new problems that drinking caused.
-Samantha
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Georgia
Posts: 16
thanks for the encouragement guys. my mood has increased a little since i last posted, so that is nice. my family just doesn't get it and that really frustrates me. they just don't get why i can't snap my fingers and stop drinking. i wish it was that easy! i'm sure you guys do too! living with an alcoholic father is just the icing on the cake. wow maybe my mood hasn't improved because i still seem to be having a pity party!!
Life the gift of recovery!
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Home is where the heart is
Posts: 7,061
Originally Posted by smt1983 
wow maybe my mood hasn't improved because i still seem to be having a pity party!!
But you haven't lost your sense of humor, that is a good sign. Looking forward to hearing more from you. Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: 49 degrees north
Posts: 1,036
SMT
My family doesn't "get it" either. Thank god. In order to "get it," or understand, they would have to experience the years of sickness and despair that I did. It's the only way to "get it." I don't "get" what it's like to have a private jet and personal pilot waiting at all times. I don't "get" what life is like when you lose your legs to a roadside bomb.
I'm not trying to be cute here. Just honest. I would like those who care about me to "accept" my illness. I would like them to trust that I am treating it with all that I have. That trust will take time to earn.
In the end it is by me and for me. I cannot be dependent on others for reinforcement or gratitude. Quitting is too hard to do for someone else. I must provide the motivation and for that and success, I receive gratitude.
Best to you!
warrens
My family doesn't "get it" either. Thank god. In order to "get it," or understand, they would have to experience the years of sickness and despair that I did. It's the only way to "get it." I don't "get" what it's like to have a private jet and personal pilot waiting at all times. I don't "get" what life is like when you lose your legs to a roadside bomb.
I'm not trying to be cute here. Just honest. I would like those who care about me to "accept" my illness. I would like them to trust that I am treating it with all that I have. That trust will take time to earn.
In the end it is by me and for me. I cannot be dependent on others for reinforcement or gratitude. Quitting is too hard to do for someone else. I must provide the motivation and for that and success, I receive gratitude.
Best to you!
warrens
Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 486
That's a tough situation and I applaud you for continuing to try.
I have not been able to do anything close to not drink on my own. I need help. I just relapsed after my longest run of sobriety to date. This has been both demoralizing but encouraging because I have been slowly building a sober support network in treatment and AA and have relapsed 2 times in just under 4 months. Considering that I was drinking every day for a number of years and heavily for the past year prior to accepting my disease, I have come along way.
Have you thought about looking into treatment or something to help you quit that involves support and education? Just food for thought and hopefully you will find the method of recovery that works in your life!
Keep on trying and remember "Progress not perfection!"
I have not been able to do anything close to not drink on my own. I need help. I just relapsed after my longest run of sobriety to date. This has been both demoralizing but encouraging because I have been slowly building a sober support network in treatment and AA and have relapsed 2 times in just under 4 months. Considering that I was drinking every day for a number of years and heavily for the past year prior to accepting my disease, I have come along way.
Have you thought about looking into treatment or something to help you quit that involves support and education? Just food for thought and hopefully you will find the method of recovery that works in your life!
Keep on trying and remember "Progress not perfection!"
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,777
I know what you mean about family's perceptions of alcoholism. My mom wants me to "just stop". She doesn't understand. Neither do a lot of people. Hang in there. Take it one day at a time.:ghug3
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
I too used Antabuse in early recovery
with good results for 9 months.
Then I did drink a single split of champagne
to celebrate New Years Eve. Bad mistake!
I became so violently ill ....it sccared me.
Naturallyy....being an alcoholic
I quit the Antabuse and continued to drink.
Another bad choice!
I did get sober that Spring...thanks to re-newing
my connection to God and AA.
I do hope you keep trying...recovery rocks!
with good results for 9 months.
Then I did drink a single split of champagne
to celebrate New Years Eve. Bad mistake!
I became so violently ill ....it sccared me.
Naturallyy....being an alcoholic
I quit the Antabuse and continued to drink.
Another bad choice!
I did get sober that Spring...thanks to re-newing
my connection to God and AA.
I do hope you keep trying...recovery rocks!
-Samantha
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Georgia
Posts: 16
Originally Posted by warrens
SMT
My family doesn't "get it" either. Thank god. In order to "get it," or understand, they would have to experience the years of sickness and despair that I did. It's the only way to "get it." I don't "get" what it's like to have a private jet and personal pilot waiting at all times. I don't "get" what life is like when you lose your legs to a roadside bomb.
I'm not trying to be cute here. Just honest. I would like those who care about me to "accept" my illness. I would like them to trust that I am treating it with all that I have. That trust will take time to earn.
In the end it is by me and for me. I cannot be dependent on others for reinforcement or gratitude. Quitting is too hard to do for someone else. I must provide the motivation and for that and success, I receive gratitude.
Best to you!
warrens
My family doesn't "get it" either. Thank god. In order to "get it," or understand, they would have to experience the years of sickness and despair that I did. It's the only way to "get it." I don't "get" what it's like to have a private jet and personal pilot waiting at all times. I don't "get" what life is like when you lose your legs to a roadside bomb.
I'm not trying to be cute here. Just honest. I would like those who care about me to "accept" my illness. I would like them to trust that I am treating it with all that I have. That trust will take time to earn.
In the end it is by me and for me. I cannot be dependent on others for reinforcement or gratitude. Quitting is too hard to do for someone else. I must provide the motivation and for that and success, I receive gratitude.
Best to you!
warrens
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