Sportster

Yes, the struggle has been that long. I go along without much trouble for a while but then I get a little too much hammered sometimes still trying to be a social drinker. Hahahaha! I know I'm an alcoholic. I get going to meetings and feeling pretty good for a while, but then I get to where I just say sh!t, if I want to drink I'll just drink. And then off I go again without much problem until I embarass myself with work or family or get to feeling really bad. But, then I say what to hell, it don't bother them half as bad as it bothers me.

What kind of thinking is that? How long will this go on? I got it going forty years now, could fifty or sixty be far off?
Then I recall those sober days and weeks, or whatever when everything smells better, tastes good, and feeeeels so much better. I do like the sober life but I find it hard to stick to. Hahahaha, ya think! I also find myself wanting to live there with the drink, and that's that goddam demon. I do like it there though .
Well I have rambled on enough, you all know the craziness. I'll try to stop or maybe not.
So sorry; I'm just another drunk and I just can't figure it out after all these years.
Sportster

serenityqueen

I battled myself/this disease for 32 years and by the Grace of God, I've been Clean & Sober for over 2 1/2 years now.

I know I wouldn't have lived 6 more months if I hadn't stopped.


I can only say a Prayer for you.

Rusty Zipper

sporty, hey, 38 years of the stupidity for this boy!

it took what it took, and now i can say i'm a man now...

good wishes

rz

Hevyn

Over 30 years for me, too, Sportster. In the end, it came down to my health. I suddenly began to feel that I would soon die if I didn't quit. Afraid to fall asleep for fear I'd never wake up - knew my body couldn't keep coming back again & again. Liver damage, stomach problems, blood pressure, heart palps., nerves - it will catch up with you. If nothing else, quit to give your body a fighting chance. I don't know about you, but I still have things I want to accomplish in this world before I go. I want my presence here to have mattered. Here's hoping you will win this fight.

crafty

Would like to thank all of you with the courage to share your stories. It sometimes feels like a lonely journey.

CarolD

Welcome to SR Crafty...

Please share your story with us
when you feel comfortable.

Glad you are here with us!

CarolD

Welcome Back Sportster....

Prayers coming your way

CAPTAINZING2000

Having a hard time deciding which side of the fence to be on.

The very last of my drinking seemed to sneak up and hit me like a sledge hammer. It progressively got worse so fast, it was like a run away train.

I had serious consequences at the very end. More and more black outs, made it impossible to even have any fun at all.

I'm finding the joy in my life today without doing anything to numb it.

I'd like to someday look back and have pleasant memories of my past.

Spending sober time with my grand kids means more to me then a drink ever did these days.

I don't regret my decision to live life sober today. The rewards for staying sober far out weigh any reason to pick up a drink today!!

CAPTAINZING2000

t's not the final destination but, the journey that makes life worth while