Sick of the cycle
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 9
Sick of the cycle
To give some background on myself, I had a huge meth addiction and got treatment in 94. Cleaned up and relapsed 2 years ago when I learned my son was dealing drugs. I guess the pain took me back and I didn't fight the triggers. Last year I was a total treakin mess, lost my job and sanity this time. Also went to jail. I went back to rehab but had to leave early because nobody was there to take care of my younger kids that was responsible. I was ok for 3 months then relapsed on other pills, basically anything I could get. I keep promising to stop and next thing you know I am popping a pill again before even thinking it thru. I am living in a household where my son is in full blown addiction and in and out of jail, my husband is drinking and leaves me alone. And you know an addict by herself.....well you get the picture. I am starting a new job tomorrow but if I can't pull myself together, it will flop too. I don't know what to do anymore. I am sick of lying to myself and my family. I wish I could love this away but that isn't working for me. I have no family, just who is with me, hubby and 3 kids. I need help, lots of help.
Naturally Occuring Phenomenon
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Baltimore, Maryland
Posts: 437
go to meetings, get support, maybe get a sponsor. One day is a good start ...do not use ....keep building up that clean time. You can do it! The more clean time the better. Stick around this forum.
We Do Recover
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Texas
Posts: 2,619
Originally Posted by rebel100 
I am starting a new job tomorrow but if I can't pull myself together........... . I need help, lots of help.
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