warrens

Hey all

I can't tell you how much I (and probably others!) appreciate the feedback. I hope it continues. All of the feedback has been helpful. I think it is a very important discussion for us "neonates," because I think we are affected more by reading of relapse than those with so many miles on their recovery odometer.

Reading of relapse doesn't make me any less resolved. It just makes me question whether the lenses I am wearing are the correct ones. Thus far I am proceeding with a minimum of fear. Relapse reading makes me fear.

I agree heartily that we can learn very important stuff by reading other's pain. Very instructive. But I would rather learn from success. Just human nature, I guess.

This is a war, and I've never been in the military. Those in Iraq learn, I guess, to live with casualties. Do they "accept them?" I don't know that. So, I understand how those who have been in the trenches here for years, adopt a realistic attitude. I sure don't like the statistics quoted, though.

Perhaps the most "sobering" comment is CarolD's. I sure didn't LIKE reading it, but it is certainly honest. And what more can we who are new ask for?

From CarolD:

Members come
Members go
Bless them all on their journey.

We are soldiers in a war and the enemy is ourselves. I guess some of us are "expendable." May we learn and turn other's loss into some gain for the world. Our success. Freedom has its cost, I guess.

Have a wonderful day and hug those who are struggling.

I hope this conversation continues...

warrens

serenityqueen

Sure, I hate to hear when someone relapsed. But I have to remember this, I am powerless of MY disease, I sure can't control theirs!

There are only a few things that I can do:

Let that person know that I care and if they need to talk or just want someone to be accountable to, I am here.

I can only share the knowledge of any tools that I have and this person may not have in their Recovery tool box yet.

I can Pray that God will give them the strength to get right back up on that horse.

Count my Blessings and Thank God



:ghug3

MNGirlyGirl

Hi Warrens,

It really hurts and can be a shock when someone we look up to and get encouragement from goes back out. When I was in long-term out-patient treatment there was a woman who had been in the program longer than me and I really admired her. I related to her and her "story" quite a bit. I was devastated when I found out that 2 weeks after she graduated she committed suicide. I found out later that she had been drinking the whole time in treatment (with her husband). She left behind the husband and a 17 year old child. So sad. Goes to show you how cunning and baffeling this disease is. You never know what is going on inside someone else's mind. I think that is why AA is so good. It helps you keep a better pulse on your emotions and what is going on inside your head.

Tazman53

When I was doing my 5th step with my sponsor he asked me if I knew how to handle fears, one of the things I came up with was face it, he said that is a beginning, but what over comes fear is faith!!! At that point in my program I was down to one major fear, that fear was of relapse!!!! I left wondering how faith could overcome that fear.

Later on sitting quietly and pondering my journey to that point I also visited the faith overcoming fear and it dawned on me. I had/have faith in the steps and suddenly the fear of relapse was lifted because I had faith in the steps, I know that if I maintain my spiritual fitness by living the steps to the best of my ability that I have no fear of relapse, you see thanks to the steps the drink problem for me is gone.

ROFL

But that isn't true! I need you. We all NEED eachother. Even if we haven't corresponded directly with eachother, we've all touched eachother in someway through this network of support.

Without the loving support we give and get from our friends there would be no reason for us to come back here.