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Old 03-01-2008, 08:03 AM   #1 (permalink)
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New and scared

Hi everyone. I am a woman in her 40s and I have decided to get sober. I have used alcohol to self-medicate for about 10 years now, and it isn't working. I am so scared right now because I am afraid I can't do it. I was sober the last time for 30 days, one bad day came along and boom--I hit the bottle again and just gave up. I don't even know what to write here--my mind is just a big blank and my spirit feels somewhat dead.

I hope to find hope here.
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Old 03-01-2008, 08:12 AM   #2 (permalink)
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I am only on day 3 of being sober, but I think you are in the right place, this site is great for support!
I know it's scary - but you had 30 days before and that is something to be proud of! You can do this - have you ever gone to AA or another support group? It's hard to do this alone - but since you're here, you're not alone anymore!

Take care and keep posting!

Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.
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Old 03-01-2008, 08:39 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Welcome! Glad you are here! I can sooo relate to what you are saying...I am a woman in my 40s also and I remember being scared to death that I would never, ever be able to quit...but here I am with a few months of sobriety ~something I would have never thought possible when I started. Stick around, keep posting, and let us know what we can do to help. Thanks for sharing! Jomey
Farther along, we'll know all about it,
Farther along, we'll understand why.
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Old 03-01-2008, 08:39 AM   #4 (permalink)
Life is Grand
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Hi, and welcome!! I am also a woman in my 40s, recovery has so much to offer, you are not alone in this. Please read and post often.

Every Saint has a past and every Sinner has a future!
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Old 03-01-2008, 08:45 AM   #5 (permalink)

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Welcome! It is scary but try not to look ahead...just go day by day....or hour by hour if needed.
Keep posting and come on here when it is rough instead of reaching for the bottle.
You can do it.:bounce
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Old 03-01-2008, 08:51 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Hi AC and welcome. YES, you are in the right place for support. Stick around. I did, and I got...and have stayed sober (only 30+days, but sober none-the-less).
I, like everyone here, can relate.
All you have to do is TRY. That's it. As long as you're trying, you're working on getting/staying sober. And that is where we all start.
So welcome. Hope to see you around here.
There's no road, that ain't a hard road, to travel on.
Sam Roberts

Did you exchange, a walk-on part in the war, for a lead role in a cage.
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Old 03-01-2008, 09:18 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Hi I'm glad you are here. People quit drinking at many ages, it is hard but possible. Again, welcome.
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Old 03-01-2008, 09:20 AM   #8 (permalink)
Life the gift of recovery!
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Welcome to SR! Great to see a new face. You are welcome, wanted, and needed. Glad your here
NOTE: All BB quotes are from the 1st Edition of the Big Book
Depression is not a sign of weakness. It is a sign of being too strong for too long.
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Old 03-01-2008, 09:34 AM   #9 (permalink)

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spirit feels somewhat dead
It may feel that way, but by the way you wrote, I can tell you it certainly isn't! Cheer up, keep charging away there's lots of support here you may not feel comfortable with getting elsewhere!

Keep posting your thoughts and feelings about this... Everybody's here for a reason, We all need SUPPORT!
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Old 03-01-2008, 10:13 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Hi and Welcome,

I'm glad you found us.

I used alcohol to self-medicate too. It's so seductive because it worked for a brief while, but before I knew it, I was hooked.

Keep reading and posting.
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.

Marianne Williamson
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Old 03-01-2008, 10:30 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Want to say hey and welcome

I did the same thing myself. I thought drinking was helping me deal with issues. But it only made them worse.

I quit drinking when I was 40. I am 48 now and that is the best thing I ever did. I found that troubles are easer to deal with today. Drinking always dragged my troubles out.

Hope to see you here.
Just Maybe... It is true that we do not know what we have until we lose it, But it is also true we do not know what we have been missing until it Arrives.
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Old 03-01-2008, 10:43 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Hi, welcome You'll find lots of support here. It's never too early to quit but, if you're lucky, it's never too late. The good bit is you're doing it.

I agree with Resistra, you're spirit seems fine. It's the only part of yourself that can't be tainted - your emotions, mind or body may get ill, but your spirit keeps going. Try giving it a little nudge, see if it responds

Keep posting

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Old 03-01-2008, 10:54 AM   #13 (permalink)
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I to am a woman in my 40's, I share with you in your fear. I have seven days now and although it is hard I choose to hang tough. Try to keep yourself focused on recovering and the reasons why you should quit drinking. I made a list like that and refer to it when the anxiety gets to be more than I can bear.

You have come to a woderfully supportive place and I am so glad you are here.
And suddenly you know... it is time to try something new and trust in new beginnings.
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Old 03-01-2008, 11:15 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Hi and welcome to SR. I quit when I was 39. If I can quit anyone can. I go to AA and it is working for me. Please keep posting.
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Old 03-01-2008, 11:19 AM   #15 (permalink)
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I started drinking when I was 16, and quit when I was also a woman in my 40's...48, to be exact. But, with the help of detox and many, many AA meetings for the next 25 years, I am now a woman in my 70's and still sober. Even though I can no longer attend regular meetings, my Sober Recovery network has become a necessary substitute. However, I cannot recommend AA highly enough, and would strongly suggest you give it a try. Good luck.
He's coming to town... ...via the Polar Express!!!
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Old 03-01-2008, 11:24 AM   #16 (permalink)
same planet...different world
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hi AC

I've only got one toe left in my forties - let's talk scared - LOL!

hang in w've got plenty left to look forward to - keep posting .. we don't shoot our wounded!
Knowledge is knowing that tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in fruit salad.
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Old 03-01-2008, 03:40 PM   #17 (permalink)
No more merlot, more mamma

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Hi and welcome from another 40 something. You CAN do this..

Keep posting!

But I always think that the best way to know God is to love many things. ~Vincent van Gogh
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Old 03-03-2008, 08:02 AM   #18 (permalink)
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Hi! I'm also in my mid 40s and quit drinking for the first time. I was a heavy beer and wine drinking. I drank several beverages every single day for MANY years - probably since I was 19. I have 4 new days in, but prior to a 1 day slip-up I had 55 days sober - All because of the support found here. And though I did slip, I didn't fall too far before I had friends helping me back up. Friends I found here. You'll find a lot of friends here. Stay strong.
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Old 03-03-2008, 08:16 AM   #19 (permalink)

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You're in good company. The people on here are great and often have allot of good advice to share.
Take a look around. Read. Post.
Let us know how you're doing.
Good luck!
sober since 2008-03-16
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Old 03-03-2008, 08:33 AM   #20 (permalink)
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
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Hi and Welcome!
Each Day Sober Is A Victory!!
Joy In AA Recovery!

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