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Freaking out... please help I've been an alcoholic for a LONG time. I'm now 32 years old and am now drinking more than ever. I was able to stop during my pregnancy but hated every day of it. I tried to stop again about 1 1/2 years after my daughter was born but only made it for a week. When I do quit I feel like I'm going crazy. Now I'm really scared. I think I might be showing signs of Cirrhosis. I have pains on the right and left lower back, black stools, a little nausea. I've also been sick lately so I don't know if that's all it is. I know I'm completely out of control and I need to STOP. I made an appointment with my Doctor but the Doctor had to cancel so now I have to make another appt. :c004: I don't know if I should just stop cold-turkey or if I should try to wean off of it. I've heard that bad things can happen if you quit cold-turkey. Please help! I need your advice! |
Well I'm no doctor but it sounds like something is going on. One thing I do know is if the problem was with your liver or pancrease the pain would be on the front of your stomach, not the back (I've had swollen pancrease and liver before.) Get to the doctor. Oh, and also, I take milk thistle, which is a liver tonic, which is something you might think about taking everyday if you are worried about your liver. |
Oh, dear! You're right about quitting cold-turkey...it can be dangerous. In order to "quit", you really should do it with medical help...and, of course, total abstinence is the most effective path to recovery...although some folks are able to wean off. If you don't mind my asking...how were you able to quit in the past? Is there anyone you can trust who knows about your drinking? Anyone who can stay with you, or that you can stay with? For one-on-one support, you can always call your local AA hot-line. There should be someone there who can talk to you...maybe even get you to some AA meetings. As a last resort, until you can see the doctor, you have the option of getting yourself to the nearest ER. If your area is anything like New Jersey, they cannot turn you away if you ask for help...even if you don't have insurance. Whatever you do, good luck...and, please keep us posted. |
Your doctor can help you with medication to stop safely as long as you tell him everything and are willing to follow his directions. Otherwise detox centers are available but they do cost more money. Coming here is a good start to help you with your racing mind. There are many people who can help you. Have you been to any AA meetings? No point in worrying much until you see your doctor. In the mean time keep coming back and sharing. |
Thanks everyone! My problem is my own husband doesn't even know! I work out of my home office and never get so annihilated that he can tell, so I'm really scared and embarrassed. I wish I could just quit quietly and keep it all a secret. My daughter is 25 months old and does not deserve to be motherless in a few years. When I quit before, the 1st time was cold turkey when I found out I was pregnant. The 2nd time I cut it down first then quit... then gradually started up again thinking I could be moderate... NOT! |
You could die from alcohol withdrawal if your disease has progressed tht far. I had to be admitted once through the ER for medical detox--my body was shutting down>and my liver enzymes were through the roof. That was about a year ago. I did well for awhile then ended in a detox center for 2 weeks--last October. The withdrawal wasn't as bad as before. (I also have a child by the way). I recently went to the doctor and had bloodwork run--all values are normal today>including my liver. I consider it to be a miracle. When I was in the hospital the doc said that if I continued drinking--I would get cirrhosis=no question about it. But as from what I just shared--I stopped for awhile, then started drinking again. This disease is out to kill me! I cannot drink "normally" ever again--it is the equivalent of ingesting poison each time I do. My HP has better plans for me--I'm not sure what those plans are, but I know it doesn't involve consuming alcohol. I wish you well on your road to recovery. God bless! |
Black stools could be a result of drinking large amounts of something like red wine or Guinness... Deffo see your doc about the things you are worried about; please don't try to stop drinking though without seeing them first for advice on how to proceed... I know I found it hell to stop and had tried many times and eventually had to drink again to fight off the symptoms I was experiencing - racing pulse, panic attacks, dizzy, couldn't eat, nausea, itching and scratching all over - only after seeing the doc and being prescribed drugs to help me withdraw safely was I able to kick it for what has been the longest time so far, over 4 months now... By the way, your body is tougher that you think - I drank really, really heavily for over 15 years and my blood work came back all at normal levels... You'll feel better once you've seen the doc... Welcome to the forum, keep posting and let us know how you are getting on - oh, and good luck!!! :) |
I drank really, really heavily for over 15 years and my blood work came back all at normal levels... No stool discolorations or anything else... I have had lower right abdominal pains last couple of years on and off - could be related to something else though I'm not sure. |
Originally Posted by resistra
(Post 1687442)
Not to hijack a thread but I'm a newbie and would like to know how much to you was heavily? I haven't been to a doc but been a regular drinker for 10 light to moderate to somewhat heavy. No stool discolorations or anything else... I have had lower right abdominal pains last couple of years on and off - could be related to something else though I'm not sure. The last 5 years, probably averaged about 30 units of alcohol per day... The doc told me he'd known people to have died from drinking less, don't know if he was trying to scare me in to stopping, but it sure helped... :eek: |
Everyone's body is different...hence, we all are affected by alcohol differently. What to some may be heavy drinking, to others may seem like nothing at all. It isn't how much or how often, but the affect it has on each of us. We are taught in AA to "identify, not compare". could be related to something else though I'm not sure. |
I also hope that you talk to your dr. Let us know how you are doing. |
I don't know if I should just stop cold-turkey or if I should try to wean off of it. I've heard that bad things can happen if you quit cold-turkey. The problem with weaning it off is that it takes an unbelievable amount of will power to do it that way, and once you've had one drink... well you know, the rest is always history. There was a movie back in the 60's or 70's about an airline pilot that was an alcoholic trying to get off if the stuff so he could keep his job. His doc or something gave him a shot glass with painted lines on it... the idea was that he had to drop down a line every couple of days. I don't think it worked in the movie, just as i know I couldn't do it in real life. It's just too easy to tip the bottle over a little more and say... ahh just this once. Or in my case, it's too easy to walk to the store less than 400 yards away, plop down a buck twenty and say... ahhh just this once. I've been drinking for 10 years regularly and this is the second time I've quit. The first time about 2 years ago I stayed sober for a month - but I did go through my own day and a half major flu episode which was the detox thing going on. This time, nothing. You've got to make up your mind and get mad at yourself enough I guess. That's what I've done and every day I pray - and then look at the 30+ empty beer cans I've got stashed (hidden) and I cannot for the life of me believe that I drank all that ****! And the only thing I ever ended up with was a headache, skin felt like it was on fire the next morning. Ughhh! Walk through the grocery store and look at the long aisle of booze for sale and I wonder, how much have a consumed of that crap in 10 years? No no no no never never. Can't do it. I have no more headaches. I feel better, I'm anxious a bit but dang it it needs me more than I need it and it can go to hell. |
Pain in the left and right lower back might be your kidneys... as in renal failure... Try drinking lots of water to help flush those organs out... Black stools can often be blood from your gastro-intestinal track... ulcers, intestinal problems... maybe try increasing your fiber... I am NOT a doctor... I think you need to see a doctor AS SOON AS POSSIBLE! Medical professionals can make the best recommendation on what course of action to take provided you are perfectly honest with them about your drinking. As for keeping it all a secret, well... "We are only as sick as our secrets"... Your husband can be your best ally and support in recovery. (Now go find a doctor!) |
You totally shocked me by your post, I know how badly I wanted to use while I was pg and didnt.............thanks you dont even know what your post did I have a phone call to make GO TO THE DR |
Doc, program of recovey = a new life... let that young child of yours never see a drunken mom... its progressive... and ya really think hubby doesnt know? good wishes brobo! xxoo rz ps, as nonny mentioned, git to the ER! why wait? |
I'll try again and offer a little more support.. My problem is my own husband doesn't even know! I work out of my home office and never get so annihilated that he can tell, so I'm really scared and embarrassed. I wish I could just quit quietly and keep it all a secret. I would offer a guess that your husband probably does know that you drink, and that you drink regularly. So, if you went to the doctor, and came home that day and told him that the doctor said that you need to stop your regular 'drink' habit because it's hurting you, it may be a lot easier for you and him to stomach instead of the typical confrontation of 'omg, you're an alcoholic' thing. This is a stepping stone to getting help on the home front which is why it's so hard - because you're happily independent with your own routine and little accountability to others after you start drinking every day (or evening whenever). I'd definitely use the doctor as the messenger in this - and then quietly try to admit (or discuss) that 'it probably has been getting the better of you'. Perhaps ask his opinion of your drinking habits... 'John this is embarrassing to me, but the doctor says I drink too much and need to quit. What do you think?' I don't see a need to come right out and say 'Dear John, my name is Marsha, your wife and I'm an alcoholic'. Just put the talking points with the right messenger mechanism to develop the conversation into one that will be a lot less destructive and embarrassing initially.. and then start to walk down the recovery path together. Who knows what could happen. The one good thing though would be to know that your husband would support and assist you through the process, and you won't need to hide the problem any longer. Hope this helps some. |
Brobo; I didn't read every response posted to your thread, so excuse me if I repeat anything you may have heard already. Perhaps you could go to a walk-in clinic or the emergency room of your nearest hospital. If you're sick, you should see someone right away. If you are afraid to go because your husband isn't aware of your condition, then perhaps you could simply tell him you're not feeling well (that isn't a lie) and then give more details when you see the doctor. I too am a mom...a new mom....my little girl is not even 8 months, I quit because I didn't want to be battling the bottle in front of her while she grows up....and if I don't quit, I will always be sick from this disease. They say you need to quit for yourself, but.....if you can't quit for yourself right now, then maybe your child. That's what I did. At first I got sober for my daughter, now, after 30 days (yeah for me!)......as the fog is clearing, I am definately doing sobriety for ME. Please make sure you take care of yourself and go see someone right away. Tay. |
If I had the symptoms you describe I too would be freaking out in an ER I do hope you find a way to quit and stay quit. Your daughter needs a healthy Mom. Blessings to the 3 of you Welcome to SR...:) |
Originally Posted by tay-lyn
(Post 1687565)
Brobo; I didn't read every response posted to your thread, so excuse me if I repeat anything you may have heard already. Perhaps you could go to a walk-in clinic or the emergency room of your nearest hospital. If you're sick, you should see someone right away. If you are afraid to go because your husband isn't aware of your condition, then perhaps you could simply tell him you're not feeling well (that isn't a lie) and then give more details when you see the doctor. I too am a mom...a new mom....my little girl is not even 8 months, I quit because I didn't want to be battling the bottle in front of her while she grows up....and if I don't quit, I will always be sick from this disease. They say you need to quit for yourself, but.....if you can't quit for yourself right now, then maybe your child. That's what I did. At first I got sober for my daughter, now, after 30 days (yeah for me!)......as the fog is clearing, I am definately doing sobriety for ME. Please make sure you take care of yourself and go see someone right away. Tay. I have a Dr's appt for Thursday. I just hope I won't have cold feet when I get there. The ER is not an option for me now. I want to be as discreet as possible. Someone mentioned that the black stools could be a symptom of a lot of red wine which I've been drinking (unusually, normally I drink Vodka) the last few days. I've also been taking Iron so I'm hoping that's what it's from. Do I sound like I'm in denial yet? Really, I'm not. I know this is a serious problem, I'm just scared to take the first steps.... |
Be *honest* when you talk to the doctor... ...Do I sound like I'm in denial yet? ... Really, I'm not... I was terrified to take the first steps. It took me years and lots of consequences before I would admit my denial, or even consider that yeah, maybe I *was* in denial... By the time I finally did, I didn't even care about it anymore. At that point, it wasn't so much fear of "am I an alcoholic?" -- it was fear of giving up my beer and what life would be like without it. Insanity, protecting that "right to drink". ...I want to be as discreet as possible... Its good that you've got an appointment set up! |
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