Freaking out... please help
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 10
Be *honest* when you talk to the doctor...
But then, if you were, you *would* say that... right?
I was terrified to take the first steps. It took me years and lots of consequences before I would admit my denial, or even consider that yeah, maybe I *was* in denial... By the time I finally did, I didn't even care about it anymore. At that point, it wasn't so much fear of "am I an alcoholic?" -- it was fear of giving up my beer and what life would be like without it.
Insanity, protecting that "right to drink".
It won't be very discreet if you collapse, now will it?
Its good that you've got an appointment set up!
But then, if you were, you *would* say that... right?
I was terrified to take the first steps. It took me years and lots of consequences before I would admit my denial, or even consider that yeah, maybe I *was* in denial... By the time I finally did, I didn't even care about it anymore. At that point, it wasn't so much fear of "am I an alcoholic?" -- it was fear of giving up my beer and what life would be like without it.
Insanity, protecting that "right to drink".
It won't be very discreet if you collapse, now will it?
Its good that you've got an appointment set up!
I see what you mean, but I don't really care about "protecting that 'right to drink'" as much as I'm scared to deal with those days when I don't drink. The times I have been sober, I didn't feel like a normal person... basically pretty miserable.
Believe me, I wake up and go to sleep every day hating myself.. as well as every time I pour a drink.
If I ever get this worked out, I won't give a crap if I'm at a party and have to say "no, thank you". I just want to live a normal, happy life.
The thing is Brobro, you don't go from being an alcoholic for a long time to living a normal, happy life. For me, I needed to learn how to live my life without numbing myself. It was a long process to get used to dealing with emotions and everyday issues. But, you can do it.
Here's my post unchanged FWIW:
I am a 3rd year medical student and the symptoms you are describing lead me to believe you should see a doctor sooner rather than later. Carol is correct that an ER would not be inappropriate.
Black stools, or "melena" are often a sign of lower intestinal bleeding and can signal very serious illness. Melena can be a sign of anything from something you ate or drank to ulcers to cancer to liver and renal failure. Without a diagnostic work up there is no way to know which it is.
The bilateral lower back pain that you are describing is more likely related to your kidneys than your liver (or it might be muscular, but there's no way to know over the internet). Though people focus on liver issues with alcoholism, renal failure is an equally common sequela. If you are finding yourself excessively thirsty and/or urinating along with these symptoms - that's very concerning to me.
So, what I'm basically saying is that some of your signs and symptoms (melena and possible retroperitoneal pain with a history of alcoholism) are the kind that need to be worked up. They might mean nothing, but they are also seen with some very serious conditions. I would urge you to see your doctor and be very honest about your drinking history when you describe how your are feeling.
All the best.
~SK
Last edited by St_Kurt; 02-26-2008 at 10:58 PM. Reason: New s*** had come to light!
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