Almost 7 Months...WoW!
Bring Laughter Wherever You Go
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 357
16 Days today. Awesome, that is 16 days in a row that I have been a full-on Mom, no 'just getting by' while I nurse an awful hangover.
16 days of playing all day.........If I hear 'ring around the rosie' one more time!......lol
16 days of reading her a bedtime story every night.
16 days of feeling good about myself as her mother.
I am so grateful that I spent only a few months of her life drinking, instead of all of it. I didn't drink during my pregnancy or during the first three months of her life, but I did quit breast-feeding at three months so that I could start drinking again. Good idea! NOT. Anyways, within almost 4 short months, I was right back where I was before I got pregnant, a drunk! And for 4 months, I felt bad about myself, didn't do the 'mom' things I was doing or wanted to do and was ALWAYS nursing a hangover.
But now, 16 days sober, has been 16 beautiful days of gratitude and thankfullness.
Yes, I'm still struggling.......I hate that I am....why can't what I have be enough! Enough to kill that little demon inside of me that wants the drink? So the struggle goes on. But at least I'm struggling while I'm sober instead of struggling with my conscience, hangovers, lying, and basically an unmanagable life.
16 days of playing all day.........If I hear 'ring around the rosie' one more time!......lol
16 days of reading her a bedtime story every night.
16 days of feeling good about myself as her mother.
I am so grateful that I spent only a few months of her life drinking, instead of all of it. I didn't drink during my pregnancy or during the first three months of her life, but I did quit breast-feeding at three months so that I could start drinking again. Good idea! NOT. Anyways, within almost 4 short months, I was right back where I was before I got pregnant, a drunk! And for 4 months, I felt bad about myself, didn't do the 'mom' things I was doing or wanted to do and was ALWAYS nursing a hangover.
But now, 16 days sober, has been 16 beautiful days of gratitude and thankfullness.
Yes, I'm still struggling.......I hate that I am....why can't what I have be enough! Enough to kill that little demon inside of me that wants the drink? So the struggle goes on. But at least I'm struggling while I'm sober instead of struggling with my conscience, hangovers, lying, and basically an unmanagable life.
Anxiety King
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 403
Congrats on Day 16, Tay-lyn! And congrats also on becoming the Mom that you wanted to be (btw, she's adorable!).
I too feel that void (I guess that's what it is) since I quit. I figure it just takes time (easy to say, huh?). Alcohol didn't become big parts of our lives overnight, so I imaging that it's doesn't leave our lives overnight either.
You're doing a great job so far! Stay strong and it will get better.
I too feel that void (I guess that's what it is) since I quit. I figure it just takes time (easy to say, huh?). Alcohol didn't become big parts of our lives overnight, so I imaging that it's doesn't leave our lives overnight either.
You're doing a great job so far! Stay strong and it will get better.
Bring Laughter Wherever You Go
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 357
Yes, I am so blessed. She is 100% perfect. I was thinking last night that I love her so much it hurts. I was thinking about how every little part of her has stole my heart. I always tell her that when she was born, she stole my heart and so Mommy had to grow a new one. I'm so very grateful to have stopped drinking when I did, I hope and pray that I never pick up again so that I can be a good Mom to her. Today is day 17 and I am giving it my all to make it to day 18.
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