The Incredible Idiot....
Bring Laughter Wherever You Go
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 357
The Incredible Idiot....
Because I am having trouble sleeping, at night all I do is think, think, think.
Last night I was thinking about how just one drop is enough to flip the switch.
And once that switch is flipped, much like anger makes 'that guy' turn from human into the Incredible Hulk, I turn from Tay, into the Incredible Idiot.
Because I have always known that, I have always promised myself that I will slowly drink that first drink and that if I do have the second, that is where it will end. Try and try again as I have, I always ended up drunk. I couldn't understand why I couldn't stop.
The reason I can't stop is because I'm an alcoholic. I have a disease. I am alergic to alcohol. And just one DROP is enough to make me sick.
My sickness is not being able to stop.
Not being able to stop means I get drunk.
Getting drunk means I turn into the Incredible Idiot.
When I'm the Incredible Idiot, I am sloppy, foul-mouthed, selfish, loud, mean, clumsy, way-too-flirty, inappropriate, a drama queen....flat out, I'm an idiot.
And it takes only ONE DROP to flip that switch from Tay to the 'Incredible Idiot'.
Bye-Bye Tay....Hello Stupid.
:puppet This is me controled by alchohol :puppet
Last night I was thinking about how just one drop is enough to flip the switch.
And once that switch is flipped, much like anger makes 'that guy' turn from human into the Incredible Hulk, I turn from Tay, into the Incredible Idiot.
Because I have always known that, I have always promised myself that I will slowly drink that first drink and that if I do have the second, that is where it will end. Try and try again as I have, I always ended up drunk. I couldn't understand why I couldn't stop.
The reason I can't stop is because I'm an alcoholic. I have a disease. I am alergic to alcohol. And just one DROP is enough to make me sick.
My sickness is not being able to stop.
Not being able to stop means I get drunk.
Getting drunk means I turn into the Incredible Idiot.
When I'm the Incredible Idiot, I am sloppy, foul-mouthed, selfish, loud, mean, clumsy, way-too-flirty, inappropriate, a drama queen....flat out, I'm an idiot.
And it takes only ONE DROP to flip that switch from Tay to the 'Incredible Idiot'.
Bye-Bye Tay....Hello Stupid.
:puppet This is me controled by alchohol :puppet
Recovering Alcoholic/Addict
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Sarasota, FL
Posts: 102
Hi Tay.
Good post. I am a "hulk" fan from a long time ago, so I understand the reference you were making, but being unable to control your drinking does not make you an "idiot".
It certainly looks like you've recognized your problem with alcohol, so you're on a good start to sobriety.
Keep going!
Good post. I am a "hulk" fan from a long time ago, so I understand the reference you were making, but being unable to control your drinking does not make you an "idiot".
It certainly looks like you've recognized your problem with alcohol, so you're on a good start to sobriety.
Keep going!
being me
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: CA
Posts: 252
i agree
Thanks Tay!
I know exactly how you feel, although I have trouble with smoking and not drinking. I want nothing more than to be able to smoke in moderation, but my body/head just does not understand that concept. I end up in a constant fog until the drugs are gone and then feel like crap going through withdrawals (again). I have been trying to quit for years.
I am beginning to realize I really must say NO without any exceptions.
K
I know exactly how you feel, although I have trouble with smoking and not drinking. I want nothing more than to be able to smoke in moderation, but my body/head just does not understand that concept. I end up in a constant fog until the drugs are gone and then feel like crap going through withdrawals (again). I have been trying to quit for years.
I am beginning to realize I really must say NO without any exceptions.
K
Bring Laughter Wherever You Go
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 357
Hey K:
Moderation isn't even in my vocabulary. I had to look the word up to spell it right!
Years ago I used to joke about my drinking saying 'If it's worth doing, it's worth overdoing'.
Which is what I do with everything in my life...I overdo things. Wouldn't it be nice if I could apply that to my recovery!
Moderation isn't even in my vocabulary. I had to look the word up to spell it right!
Years ago I used to joke about my drinking saying 'If it's worth doing, it's worth overdoing'.
Which is what I do with everything in my life...I overdo things. Wouldn't it be nice if I could apply that to my recovery!
Naturally Occuring Phenomenon
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Baltimore, Maryland
Posts: 437
when I was drinking I drank almost 24/7....I didn't alwayz turn to the darkside....its worse when you are the only one smashed or the only one who gets that way. I have not come close to a drink in like 81 dayz or something and if I did and was alone I would probably drink it, just to see how it might be. probably would end up drunk. it might have to be done. but not today.
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