...Have this urge to snort or drink...
tangled up in blue
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: MA
Posts: 401
...Have this urge to snort or drink...
Hi everyone. I know I'm always coming in and out. My life has just been busy as I'm sure yours has also been. I've been doing okay at remaining sober. The last that I drank was...a few weeks ago-a month ago. I promised my boyfriend I would stop drinking.
Anyway, this weekend I didn't have a very good weekend. I stayed with my boyfriend and he made some insensitive remarks to me that really brought me down. I'm sure other people can understand that sometimes we as addicts have low self-esteem so it'd be nice if some people would understand that and not try and make us insecure on purpose, you know? I am generally very well-aware of peoples' feelings and try my best to accomodate them. Also, I have been going through a rough patch at home. I'm just tempted to snort Ritalin tonight or drink a little bit even though I know I shouldn't. I just thought I would type here about it. Thanks for reading this.
Anyway, this weekend I didn't have a very good weekend. I stayed with my boyfriend and he made some insensitive remarks to me that really brought me down. I'm sure other people can understand that sometimes we as addicts have low self-esteem so it'd be nice if some people would understand that and not try and make us insecure on purpose, you know? I am generally very well-aware of peoples' feelings and try my best to accomodate them. Also, I have been going through a rough patch at home. I'm just tempted to snort Ritalin tonight or drink a little bit even though I know I shouldn't. I just thought I would type here about it. Thanks for reading this.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 2,299
Hey 
I'm recently back here too having relapsed several times over Christmas.
I'm sorry you've felt hurt.All I can say again is-snorting/drinking will NOT make you feel better hon.You know it.I know it.It's a lie we tell ourselves to give ourselves an excuse.Tomorrow?You'll still have the same hurt feelings-only a ton of remorse for using to go with them.Why add to it?
I understand wanting to feel numb-but you've got to go through some things, hard as they are to feel.
I think so much of my drinking has been to avoid this-to avoid growing up and learning to deal with my emotions.I know it's difficult.But picking up won't make you feel better in the end-that's a promise.
That said-it's really good to see you and hear from you.I do still think about you.I hope you find a way out of this.
Love,
Julesxox
I'm recently back here too having relapsed several times over Christmas.
I'm sorry you've felt hurt.All I can say again is-snorting/drinking will NOT make you feel better hon.You know it.I know it.It's a lie we tell ourselves to give ourselves an excuse.Tomorrow?You'll still have the same hurt feelings-only a ton of remorse for using to go with them.Why add to it?
I understand wanting to feel numb-but you've got to go through some things, hard as they are to feel.
I think so much of my drinking has been to avoid this-to avoid growing up and learning to deal with my emotions.I know it's difficult.But picking up won't make you feel better in the end-that's a promise.
That said-it's really good to see you and hear from you.I do still think about you.I hope you find a way out of this.
Love,
Julesxox
Member
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Recovery
Posts: 3,229
Sorry you got hurt. But snorting ritalin and drinking will only compound the problem and you will hurt more tomorrow. Then you'll be hungover on top of the pain you're feeling right now. Think about tomorrow morning... you don't want to face this with that sick hungover shame feeling... so hang in there tonight.
I went through a tough situation this past weekend too and posted a thread about it. I got through the hurt and you can get through this....
It will pass if you allow it too and you will feel so proud of yourself and stronger for facing it and walking through it.
As long as we turn to substances to deal with our hurts and feelings, we will never get through it. But it we talk and walk it out, we can get through anything.
It's all a part of the journey. Hang in there!
I went through a tough situation this past weekend too and posted a thread about it. I got through the hurt and you can get through this....
It will pass if you allow it too and you will feel so proud of yourself and stronger for facing it and walking through it.
As long as we turn to substances to deal with our hurts and feelings, we will never get through it. But it we talk and walk it out, we can get through anything.
It's all a part of the journey. Hang in there!
tangled up in blue
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: MA
Posts: 401
Jules -- I'm so happy to hear from you! Thank you for your kind words. I often think about you and how you're doing. I'm glad to hear that you're doing better now. I really understand the whole relapse thing--obviously!
Dee, it was great to hear from you as well. You're always so encouraging.
Hope4Life, you are right that I'll feel worse tomorrow. I decided that I'm going to try and read a book instead. Thanks for the support, everyone.
Dee, it was great to hear from you as well. You're always so encouraging.
Hope4Life, you are right that I'll feel worse tomorrow. I decided that I'm going to try and read a book instead. Thanks for the support, everyone.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: UK
Posts: 18,299
Originally Posted by Dee74 
well as usual Jules beat me to it and said it better LOL.
I am glad you didnt do it B2B and hang around here more! Oh wait, did Dee say that?
JUST DO IT!!
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Here Or There
Posts: 7,612
Good to see ya again B2B been thinking of you!
Oh yes the urge of using seems to pass....
Not focusing on using and changing our thoughts to something other than using
Reading....
Writing....
Music.....
Whatever it takes to get that nasty thought out of our heads.
it will pass if we allow it too.
Oh yes the urge of using seems to pass....
Not focusing on using and changing our thoughts to something other than using
Reading....
Writing....
Music.....
Whatever it takes to get that nasty thought out of our heads.
it will pass if we allow it too.
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