Hello.
Hello.
Hi, I am happy to see a place I can go to and just be able to read , or talk any time of the day or night to people going threw the same journey in life. Not that I dont have freinds in my aa groups that I know are just a phone call away, but I can relate to some who said they have relapsed and I get that feeling of being ashamed and feeling like I dont belong. I know that is just my negative thinking and it will pass but for now that is alittle how I feel. I have been sober sence Jan 1 now, I havent been going to as many meetings as I know I should be. I have a bad tendency to isolate and I know thats how I just sit in all that ugliness and start thinking to much and it builds up till I decide Ive had enough and I want to escape these feelings. The good thing I guess is Im recognizing this, now its time to start changing the behaviors. I also have realized I just dont want to stop drinking, I want to feel happy and live life. It aint just putting down the drink, theres so much more involved that will bring me back to that drink. I am very co-dependent, I have alot of built up anger, and on & on & on, I guess thats why they say "one day at a time". I want to feel better now and I realize thats not reality, theres a mountian of things I need to work on and thats why I say its a journey. Finding out who I really am and being who I want to be and feeling real happiness is going to be a journey and a hard one at times, but I know it will be worth it. Im sick of hurting, Im sick of hurting my family. I spent 24 yrs hurting, its time to spend the next 20 or more healing and happy. Niceto meet you all!
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