Trying to get sober again
 

I've been struggling with alcohol abuse for many years. I got sober for periods of time using a program similar to this. Lately I've been under tremendous stress and have gone from occasionally drinking, to daily drinking, to daily drinking with frequent binges. In addition, I've been abusing xanax and ativan. I don't know how to stop again. This is a tough road but I want to change this before something terrible happens to me or my family. So, I guess I'm just going to focus on not drinking tonight. My urges seem to hit hard in the late afternoon early evening.

Hi Tigger,

Welcome!

I'm glad you are seeking help.

Try to do something this evening that will distract you, even for a few minutes, just to take your mind off drinking. It is a tough road, but it will be well worth it.

Hi tigger,

Welcome. Keep reading and posting and hang in there.

Barb

Glad you found us....
Welcome to SR!

Have you discussed your situation with yor doctor?
As you are drinking and abusing your meds
it would be a wise move to get a medical opinion.

Be both sober and safe ..:hug:

Thanks for your replies. I am trying very hard to keep myself distracted. I have not drank tonight, but have taken my xanax "as prescribed," but still...I"m not sure that is even a good thing, as it relaxes me and lets me believe that these big issues really are not so bad.

Want to quit drinking.....
 

Hi Tigger,

You have made a very good decision...there is a lot to do though since you are having alcohol problems and prescription drug abuse together. It would be wise to talk with your doc and be honest because some people need help to go off the medications slowly depending on how many you have been taking daily along with the alcohol.

When I quit drinking, I was taking Ativan & a sleeping pill but I didn't take these meds until I was detoxed in a hospital setting...six days. I also was getting help for my depression that was first diagnosed when a teen. I used alcohol to self-medicate my depression & anxiety when it only made it worse.

I was on and off meds and did stay sober a year here and month there...but nothing lasted.

There is a lot of support and help here on Sober Recovery. Keep coming back and read...post...or just say Hi!!!

kelsh

Kelsh,
Thanks for your reply.
Yes, the combination of alcohol addiction and prescription drug addiction is daunting. I just don't think I can do inpatient. I didn't take my xanax/ativan for the first time last night and I didn't sleep, but survived. My legs were jittery and my mind was racing.

Be sure to take those benzos as prescribed, Tigger. It's very dangerous to stop taking them abruptly. If you wish to get off of them, talk to your doctor, and follow a safe taper plan. Good luck and I'm glad you're here with us :)

welcome Tigger
 

I want to echo the advice of the others above. Be careful with how you stop taking your medications and talk to and be honest with your doc, so that you can get on a plan to wean yourself off of the xanax. Not everything should be quit cold turkey, although I understand that is the usual advice for alcohol.

Speaking as someone who also suffers from depression and who self-medicated for years with alcohol, the combination of prescription anti-depressants (including addictive ones like xanax) is powerful and dangerous. I'm still struggling myself. I'm on my fourth day sober, but I still need to take my anti-depressants--as prescribed, which I have been doing. Maybe eventually I'll be able to reduce/eliminate those other meds, but for now I'm concentrating on one step at a time, and that step is no alcohol.

Take care,

Jana

Thanks Jana and Rowan. My doctor is not the most understanding person, or insightful. I'm not on such a high dose of these meds that I cannot get off myself, I mean I don't think I'm at risk of a secondary medical issue from withdrawal.

Jana...good job with 4 days. You must be feeling a bit better. And, I think you are wise to stay on your anti-depressants until you are feeling stronger.

Hi....You are in the right place for the moment where you can talk to others that have been in your shoes many times........

I want to suggest that if your Doc isn't going to be much help then you need to find another.... OR go to an urgent care place where you can get the help you need from someone that does understand.......

Maybe this is the time to seek another doctor that helps more in the area you need so you can get a recovery program started......

Think about it............... You need an inpatient recovery program....

You can't do this on your own...... It won't work that well...... You need more help than you can give yourself......

Keep coming back and hang in there................

Praying for you that the right decission is made for the moment......

Little Penguin

End of Day 4 -
 

Thanks, Tigger! I love your monicker--we do a lot of reading Pooh stories around this house.

I'm happy to be at the end of Day 4 and looking forward to Day 5. I've struggled long with anxiety and depression, pre-dating by years my alcohol abuse. So these first few days of sobriety haven't been much fun, physically or emotionally. But I admit today was a little bit easier than yesterday, and I am going keep hoping that trend continues for long enough that I can get stronger.

I would also echo the advice to maybe try another doctor. I know for me, in-patient treatment isn't a realistic option--I would have to get my work to give me medical leave, and get my parents to make my mortgage payment. So I'm trying to put together a bundle of coping strategies: herbal tea, exercise outdoors, healthy meals, following my (good) doctor's orders, being in the moment with my kids ... I'm repeating my other post, but mainly for my own benefit.

Hope to check in with you tomorrow. My thoughts are with you in your struggle. Remember that sometimes we can discover more strength than we realized we had, whether it's from a higher power or some other source.

xanax and alcohol are a particularly bad combination. Go google what it can do to you after a relatively short period of time. Also, xanax is one of the most addictive things you can be taking let alone alcohol. In this case I say a visit to the doc would be a very good idea.

Drinking only amplifies your stress level. Just remember that. It's only a temporary solution with long term consequences. You will need alcohol just to feel like you can function through the day (maybe you're already at this point). I can't think of many things worse than this. It only gets harder and harder the more you continue. Im sure you know but it's always good to have someone give you a fresh dose of reality. You stopped before... (for how long though?) What made you start again after being sober?

It's no longer fun and games. It's a serious issue that will destroy your mind and your life if something isn't done.

Take a deep look inside and just be realistic. Be honest to yourself. I know it's a vicious cycle but you need to break it and the only thing you can do is look forward to being sober and feeling good again by getting in control of yourself and going through the pain of stopping. Do whatever it takes to get there.

This place has helped me a lot. I hope it does as much for you as it has for me.

Good News Tigger. Keep coming back to SR. Maybe try finding a sober activity like this forum or an AA/NA meeting to fill your toughest time of day.

Best Wishes For the Day!

Tigger welcome to SR, as others have said see a doctor, this is beyond what the alcohol and xanax are leading you to beleive. If you have no trust of your present doctor then it is time to get another one.

Go to the doctor, be brutally honest and follow the doctors advice.

Hang in there Tigger.... you are among friends here and we all love you lots..... Praying for you each day and sending you Hugs....

Little Penguin