i'm lost
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Union City, New Jersey
Posts: 1
i'm lost
Greetings to all!!! My name is Eloisa(Elly) nickname. I'm new on this forum and not quite sure where to start.I've only been sober for about 2 and half months and it gets harder for me to deal with these feelings that i've blocked out for so long. i was a heroin addict and stil can't eat or sleep normally. i feel alone , scared and shame. i feel as though no one can relate to my pain and i dont want to pick up 
again. it nearly took my life. so if there's anyone out there that can maybe give me some hope please respond to this... thank you.
again. it nearly took my life. so if there's anyone out there that can maybe give me some hope please respond to this... thank you.
everything is already ok
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Melbourne Victoria Australia
Posts: 19,789
Hi Elly welcome to SR and congrats on your clean time 
Have a look around at teh posts and take a look at the stickies at the top of each forum, there is loads of good info there.
Do you have a Program and or some support? How have you been staying clean until now?
My feelings of fear anger went gradually and being around other addicts in recovery gave me a sense of hope and belonging. At some point in the first few months the obsession to use was removed and to this day has not returned.
I used smack coke speed booze, Acid, Amil Nitrate, Mandies, Ether and basically anything I could get in my mouth up my nose in a vein or smoke, my DOC was more basically. I was hope less desperate and a member of the walking dead, lost and alone.
Today I never feel alone, I do not live in fear and after nearly 3 years have an amazing life, work easily, am loved and love family and friends, am trusted am open. And this is just teh beginning i am a Work In Progress. So welcome, it keeps getting better.
Others will be along shortly to say hi.
Just being is so good.
Kevin
Have a look around at teh posts and take a look at the stickies at the top of each forum, there is loads of good info there.
Do you have a Program and or some support? How have you been staying clean until now?
My feelings of fear anger went gradually and being around other addicts in recovery gave me a sense of hope and belonging. At some point in the first few months the obsession to use was removed and to this day has not returned.
I used smack coke speed booze, Acid, Amil Nitrate, Mandies, Ether and basically anything I could get in my mouth up my nose in a vein or smoke, my DOC was more basically. I was hope less desperate and a member of the walking dead, lost and alone.
Today I never feel alone, I do not live in fear and after nearly 3 years have an amazing life, work easily, am loved and love family and friends, am trusted am open. And this is just teh beginning i am a Work In Progress. So welcome, it keeps getting better.
Others will be along shortly to say hi.
Just being is so good.
Kevin
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Hello and Welcome to sR!
It's great to see a new member
Well Done on your clean time!
Here is another Forum for you to read
please click on the line below
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/substance-abuse/
Keep in focus and do keep posting
It's great to see a new member
Well Done on your clean time!
Here is another Forum for you to read
please click on the line below
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/substance-abuse/
Keep in focus and do keep posting
Fighting the good fight
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 309
Ellie, welcome to SR. You're doing the right thing.
I gave up heroin 8 years ago, but I went straight to a bottle of vodka a day so i wouldn't recommend doing it my way haha.
I'm only just now getting off the booze (35 days woohoo!), but I too have been through pretty much everything I could get my hands on. It's hard to deal with all that reality, but keep positive, try and keep healthy, and perhaps think about getting some outside support.
If you don't want to go to NA or AA (which i would recommend, but lots of people don't like), then maybe think about seeing someone else - counsellor, naturopath, homeopath or another professional - there are millions of people in this world trained to help people just like us.
For starters, read what you can find here (there's HEAPS), and please ask as many questions as you can - there are lots of people who have been through what you have right here.
I would also suggest writing down everything that you're ashamed of, all the painful things, and get them out. Once you've got something down, you can look at it a bit more objectively. i think when we don't name our fears, or our pain, it can become overwhelming. if it's all in front of you, it doesn't ever seem to look that bad. I have been doing this, and it's helped heaps. I have also cleaned the **** out of my house, I mean cleaned it within an inch of its life! And I have been cooking really healthy food, and trying to get out of the house and exercise, and even if it's just find some books that I love and sit in the sun reading.
Getting off heroin leads you to life, away from death. Nice to meet you, and stick around.
All the best for your recovery, talk soon,
ndz
I gave up heroin 8 years ago, but I went straight to a bottle of vodka a day so i wouldn't recommend doing it my way haha.
I'm only just now getting off the booze (35 days woohoo!), but I too have been through pretty much everything I could get my hands on. It's hard to deal with all that reality, but keep positive, try and keep healthy, and perhaps think about getting some outside support.
If you don't want to go to NA or AA (which i would recommend, but lots of people don't like), then maybe think about seeing someone else - counsellor, naturopath, homeopath or another professional - there are millions of people in this world trained to help people just like us.
For starters, read what you can find here (there's HEAPS), and please ask as many questions as you can - there are lots of people who have been through what you have right here.
I would also suggest writing down everything that you're ashamed of, all the painful things, and get them out. Once you've got something down, you can look at it a bit more objectively. i think when we don't name our fears, or our pain, it can become overwhelming. if it's all in front of you, it doesn't ever seem to look that bad. I have been doing this, and it's helped heaps. I have also cleaned the **** out of my house, I mean cleaned it within an inch of its life! And I have been cooking really healthy food, and trying to get out of the house and exercise, and even if it's just find some books that I love and sit in the sun reading.
Getting off heroin leads you to life, away from death. Nice to meet you, and stick around.
All the best for your recovery, talk soon,
ndz
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