Where to begin?
 

Hi everyone, I am looking desparatly to find answers as to how I can fix what is essentially killing me.
I have a tendency to drink too much after a major life changing event.
I will detail those later, but I have been going thru a divorce and have been trying to stay sober for over 6 months now. I go for two weeks and then booom! I see her, or she calls me and I fall compleatly appart.
I got married last Feb. and we called it quits at the end of July...she was having a fling with her ex behind my back. Totally broke my heart.

I have forgiveness, and have been nice. However she is cruel and nasty. I have had to change my # 4 times in these 6 months.

I feel as though I have to compleatly quit both booze and move on...which I have tried to do, but it seems as the only people I attract are drinkers...
anyway...thanx for listening and I hope to post more as it comes up.

hey Johnnie -

Welcome to SR.

wow. divorce. been therre, did that one ... four times.

never did get the hang of it.

I hope you'll take a look around, and particularly read the stickies on the top of each forum. There's a wealth of information and linkages to other information that is quite useful.

Please - DO continue to post, and others will be along as they arrive to welcome you!

SR is a very supportive, interesting batch of people with quite common problems.

Hi and Welcome to SR!
:)
Have you considered an answering machine?
I screen my calls...delete the ones I don't want to talk with.

You might want to check with your doctor before quitting abruptly.
Withdrawing from alcohol is a serious medical situation
and you can be safe and sober too.

Glad you found us ...:)

Tt
















Thank you for the welcome....I unfortunatly only use a cell for both biz and personal. I have been clean for 5 days and havent felt any withdrals...just the typical anxiety of being alive. as i have been reading, I see that I may also have codependency issues...
Incredible site! thank you again

Wow....how fortunate you are to have had no symptoms.

In the Friends and Family Forum....
there are sticky post at the top

Several are on Co-Dependant issues.

Soo....that would help you I think.

Welcome Johny,plenty of support and advice here for you. Sounds like its been tough so best wishes.

Welcome Johnny!

It's great that you have found us and that you realize you need to stop drinking and possibly also consider that you might have codependency issues.

What I learned when I stopped drinking is that it takes making some hard decisions. For example, I had to remove some people from my life who were toxic. Once I did that, surprisingly to me, my life became filled with fantastic people. Open yourself up to the miracle and make the changes you need to.

Hi Johnny,

Welcome to SR...

Divorce is very painful...I have been there and I remember trying to escape the emotional pain by drinking or taking pills...It didn't help anything and when I did sober up I HAD to face those uncomfortable feelings and work through them...

Keep posting, we are glad you found us...:ghug

Welcome to SR!:ghug2

Thanks for posting, Johnny! I think once you get a few more days of sobriety, you'll find a new sense of self. One that can say, "You'll either treat me with respect and decency, or we won't talk anymore."

I'm sorry for your pain. I'll send good vibes your way.

Johnny -
yeah. me, too. Hi, I'm *barb.
I'm an alocholic.
Not saying *you* are ...
just that I know fer a fact what *I* am.

Divorce and all that goes with is .. is a death in a way.
So you're going to attempt to grieve ... without drugs or alcohol.

OK .
NOW .. we're in my neighborhood.

This past Thanksgiving, I grieved a loss for the first time ...
and didn't drink.
Didn't use.
And it wasn't easy.
But my friends here at SR, and those in 'real life' ...
helped me.

I hope you post today - I'd like to know how you're doing.

Hello everyone, and thanx for all the advice...been keeping it together...amazingly not really jonesing....Have been a little edgy and smokin like crazy ( cigs that is )...

I really havent posted much as I have been reading more than anything. Just feel a bit trapped as I am stuck at my moms house while this crap blows over and I can get me another place.

but 6 days and counting...the long weekend makes it hard...plans with friends and such that I passed up on to remain on the planet...I guess testing myself.

Welcome, Johnny and Congrats on 6 days!!!!.....

One of the things that I came to realize mostly about the situation I am in...I allowed myself to be stepped on and am now...or was punishing myself.
I miss my step daughter incredibly, my life...the structure that was.
I had a call from the ex and she balked at me for quitting drinking...but I said I was doing it for me...not her...not anymore.

I realize why we arent together...strangely comforting.

Insights already - that's good.

thanks for posting... keep up the good work.

*preayers*

we're all in this together.