treading water?
 

I haven't had a drink in nearly 8 weeks and I find myself just as confused as the last day I had a drink. I am going to meetings yet I find myself not focusing as much since I am no longer physically ill. I have had set backs in my life since I have started this road...lost my job, my relationship ended and severed ties with all my friends (really I see alcohol affected all of those things long before I started this path)

I find myself thinking in the first few weeks I felt the progress was much up front, but now I feel there is no movement forward. I am afraid I will lose focus on this struggle if I don't figure out want is going on. Do I just force myself to find new things to do since all my life all I did is drink and use drugs? Should I just start talcking problems and forget about where I am. I am trying to listen at meetings and see what works for others, but it I find myself walking away just as confused as when I walked in.

Put your recovery first and everything else will fall into place. I tried fixing all the external problems in my life--job, finances, spending time with family,etc when I had 70+ days sober--well I went back out because I lost my focus. I have been sober since 1/3/08 now and sobriety must be priority.

I had to focus on my recovery, totally, in the early days.
I had to be in charge of my thinking and my attitude.
I had to be like a sponge and learn all I could from those who had been there.
There will be hard days, there will days, when we feel like throwing in the towel, but we recognise them for what they are, and we keep our eyes on the prize.
In early recovery it is hard to see the forest for the trees, it is almost impossible to see how good your life is going to get.
An entirely new life awaits you, you just can't see it yet.
Hang in there my friend.

Seren


Well Done on 8 Weeks, the best is yet to be !

Hmmm...
Are you aware of PAWS?

Post Acute Withdrawl - Relapse Prevention Specialists - TLC The Living Center

You mentioned meetings....if you are attending
a 12 Step program
I think finding a sponsor and begining the Steps
would move you forward. They sure did me! :)

Blessings

It's only eight weeks.

No matter HOW much you drank or used, or how long - your body is still trying to heal.

Yeah. That's the problem with thinking. It scares the crap outa us most of the time - scares us so bad - we have to shut it up somehow. Usually -= by going back to the sedative of choice - drink or drugs.

Don't FORCE ... anything.
Addiction is all about forcing.
You don't do that any more.
Gonna take a little time to get used to it -
but it's a much better way to be.

We have a saying ...
"Just be where your hands are."

"Should I" ... pretty much means - you're going someplace else in your head.
Not ... HERE.
What is going on here .. is ....
what got said in your meeting tonight?
Got your dishes done?
Got your step work out of the way for today?
Didja take a minute to study clouds, or connect with something greater than yourself today?

Where are you ... right now?

online.
reading this.
where's youre hands?
right here...maybe with one particular finger pointing at me.
heehee. I know it's not what we want to hear.

but you're HERE.

WE ... don't tackle anything any more.
We allow what is ... to be.

your'e learning this, I can see it in your post.
It looks like old habit trying to take over,
is all,
and new habits are not secure enough to be automatic.

Let yer body heal first.

You've received some great advice here, in the previous posts..

JMO

Bob, I just wanted to thank you for your post. I needed to hear that too. I read it a couple of times, you do have words of wisdom. Thank you!

When I read your post I thought of the person who goes to jail for a considerable amount of time and comes out in the same condition or worst. Nothing changes if nothing changes. I went to jail 100% addicted to alcohol and drugs. After a few weeks all the physical symptoms disappeared. I was sick of this crap and was determined to change the way I lived. I spent all of my time reading self help, and recovery books. I read a book or two a day...

12 months clean and sober and after reading all those books when I go out of jail I thought I knew what made me tick. I thought I was going to stay sober for the rest of my life. I got a job, a good job everyone was proud of me and there wasn’t a cloud on the horizon. Something told me I could just stop off for a beer or two so I did and back to jail I went. Today I have an AA sponsor and have worked the 12 steps of recovery in my life and not only do I feel better I no longer have to drink. I have a feeling this isnt something you havent already heard. Nothing changes if nothing changes..

My progress comes in spurts. I was telling a friend last night that I felt stagnant for a few days, and after last nights meeting my mind was spinning again and I was confused all over again. I find that a good meeting will get me back on track, and sometimes I don't always get what I need from a meeting. When I do hit a really good meeting that gets me thinking I get a jump start.