Struggling with Resistance to Attending Meetings
 

Help!

When I was on the wagon before, I went to meetings at least on Wednesdays and Saturdays. I liked them...though there's a couple people that attend who consistantly have sunshine shooting out their asses (pardon me), which drives me batty. In fact, in the past I've used them as rationalizations for picking up a bottle of wine on my way home.

So now I'm back as a permanent guest on the sobriety train...and I'm finding this tremendous inner-resistance to going to meetings. Not just those two meetings --in actuality, they're terrific meetings-- but ALL AA meetings.

For instance, I should be en route to a meeting as I type this...but I just confirmed other plans with a friend of mine. Granted, I won't drink tonight, but I know coming together with other alchi's is helpful. I want to get back on track...but...eh.

Has anyone else felt this way? Any advice?

Thank you!

B'sT

My stubborn arse resists anything that I am told to do!!! Even if I want to go, once someone tells me I have to, I don't want to go anymore!!!!! Sheesh, talk about a stubborn old alcoholic...that would be me!!! My suggestion would be to give one meeting a try, I think you will be surprised to see that it isn't that bad. As for the one or two that bug the bejesus out of you, they will be there in every thing you do, meetings/work/church (if you attend) etc., possibly they are put there to teach us patience, tolerance and kindness...and sometimes, the message they carry is the one we need to hear that day. Don't let anyone keep you from your recovery. Good Luck with whatever you choose to do......AA is only ONE way to recover...there are more, I hope you find what works for you.

Cathy

Hey B'sT

It is really up to you if you want to go to a meeting. You will not get much out of it if you don't go for yourself anyway.

Keep posting and let us know how it is going.

Just trying to help

:laughing: I'm one of the sunshine AA members!
I see talking walking miracles in every meeting
and in my mirror.

That is the joy of recovery you are seeing.
Come find yours....:)

My experience has been that the more I resisted going to meetings the more I needed to be there. One of my character defect is bull headedness. I don't handle people telling me what to do very well. I tend to bow up and become determined that they will not win. That is why when I am resistant to meetings I make myself go. I need all the help I can get to change the negative aspects of who I am. I not only want to stay sober but in the process I want to become a better person.

I havent been to a meeting for a while but when I first quit I made a commitment to myself to go to 3 a week. That way I didnt have room to wriggle out of it mentally.

However, that was just me and where I was at, at the time. Like Surly said, AA isnt the only way.
I do think, 'if youre gonna do it then do it', tho! LOL. But I have to think that way cos I am totally stubborn and lazy. :)

I can definitely relate. I had to find a meeting I was comfortable with to go regularly. Even this meeting is 21 miles away from my house!

I also travel a lot on business, and I get to go to a lot of meetings, sometimes to places I know (or strongly suspect) I will never go back to.

When I started I did not want to go back to meetings either. I think it was more of me admitting once and for all that I had a huge problem w/ alcohol to everyone around me. Once I started going I found it was a place of safety, and I BELONGED. Something I never thought I did in my life. I never felt like I "fit in", and in AA I did. Today I look foward to going to meetings. A lot of my friends are there. I would sudjest to go to a few meetings around you, and see if there is one you injoy. Heck!! You might even become one of those Happyy AA people. Life is not all that bad being happy. Better then the alternative.

Hi Blake,

You should do whatever you need to do to maintain sobriety!

Thank you to all you guys.
I'm going to recommit myself to the two days a week, I think.

For the record-- I really am a happy, positive person. My "sunshine people" are very young with no real life experience, drank for almost no time at all, quit when they were around eighteen, and spend the meetings telling struggling 30-and-40-somethings that life's all puppies and rainbows and unicorn-horseys. As a 20-something, I find it grating and feel almost caught in the middle.

Thanks again to all you guys! I'll be going from now on FOR ME.

Y'all are wonderful,

B'sT

"unicorn-horseys"

[snicker]

Blake,

You are in Laguna Beach; there must be over 100 meetings within 10 miles or less of you. Why not try a few until you find one that suits you? Some meetings send me right up the wall and others have saved me when my ass was falling off. Did you like every bar you ever walked in to?

The biggest problem with AA meetings is that they are filled with people who are a little crazy. In fact it is hard to find one that isn't chock full of folks who can't keep their lives in control! I just happen to be one of those, sometimes better than other times.

I will say that one of the best meetings that I ever attend is held in the park on Sunday mornings at 10AM on the grass overlooking the Pacific Ocean, just North of Las Brisas. If you haven't done that one give it a try and as you look out over the ocean decide if that isn't about as good as it gets.

Best of luck and if you want to meet some time on Sunday email me, (private message) and I would consider it my honor.

Jon

I am currently NOT going to meetings. The ones I have been to have people with such sob stories when they are new. And quite truthfully, I have a wonderful life. I've never been in an accident (well...there was that one), I've never been hospitalized, caused any problem, lost a car because I couldn't find it... I just drink alone at home.

But what gets me about the meetings are the people who have been in recovery for 20 some odd years. I know I'm a newbie, but isn't there ever a time that you are well enough that you DON"T have to go?

ROFL - I've been thinking about the same thing, and I think it's more than that. I think I'm starting to enjoy being at meetings.

And I think that people who have been there for a long time still get a kick out of being there. I think it gives them a chance to be grateful, and supportive, and to give something back to the community that saved their lives.

I imagine there are thousands upon thousands of people who got sober and didn't continue meetings, but the ones that still go either want or need to be there, so they keep going.

I don't know if I'll go to meetings for the rest of my life, but I'm happy to keep going for the moment because I feel good when I leave.

Hey B's T,

most of the time, im somewhere between what lost said, and what rofl said, to be honest with you. And yes, there is plenty of new good stuff to keep me going.

a recent move, and difficulties that come with that, and old drinking buddie's death from addiction complications, other peoples drama and my indifference, girlfriend shows up drunk, what have you... still unemployed largely...

keepin it real, with you.

yet more bad news just arrived...

just gota suit up and show up, thats my plan. For me lately, just pullin closer to aa and the fellowship, because i need to keep getting by clean and sober... indifference is a bi*tch. why does my ego want to kill me? another step 2 day for me, i think... Im decidedly sick and tired of wresteling against step one...

pink clouds require me to wear a pink crash helmet... i do not look good in pink, btw

i gota deal with a miserable drunkjunkie on day 9 in a few hours. he's circling the drain about 2 years infront of my bottom...

less and less i am comparing my insides with peoples outsides...

Aa_vark, that sounds like a rough day ahead of you, good luck and stay strong.

We haven't met, but I hope everything settles down and things get easier for ya.

ndz

thank you ndz- making lemonade with lifes little lemons...