Jersey Nonny

Think about it...if you went to meetings for "20 some odd years", and made friends over that period of time, wouldn't you enjoy seeing them on a regular basis? I know I did...it isn't a matter of having to go, but wanting to go. Actually, for many people, AA becomes an extended family.

Den13

I have tried to quit many, MANY times and always start off strong only to make up excuses for going to meetings. If I had a headache it was enough not to go. I got the same impressions on people there too. I have not been to jail or lost my house or lost my job (yet), but I do understand that if it helps them then I guess I can listen. I suppose I should be grateful that I am NOT one of "those" people. Who knows what 10 more years of drinking would do to me.
Sometimes you just have to bite the bullet. If anything, go for the free coffee.:rof

Spiritual Seeker

The Canyon Club on laguna cyn rd. is an awesome mtg. hall with lots of mtgs. daily to choose from

sweetnovember

In the early days I really felt I needed to go to stay away from a drink. Now I think once a week will be enough along with working the steps. I felt grateful that I didn't hit the bottom in such horrible ways people shared. I also felt a bit depressed after those stories and thought about drinking more after one of those shares. Now I find my peace in my renewed relationship with God.

nogard

Here is what I did, you can borrow my technique if you like;

Resist but go anyway

Kevin
`

Pinkcuda

There's two sides to every meeting. What you get out of a meeting and also, what you add.
Adding something to a meeting is just as big of a benefit to you, if not bigger. Keep going, keep smiling and remember that something you add might be of help to someone else. Experience shows that nothing contributes to our sobriety like helping another Alcoholic. Newcomers add a lot more than they think they do!

paulmh

People go to meditation groups every week. I would suggest that the people who stop going to meditation groups because "it's the same old silence every week" are missing the point a little.

ROFL

After reading subsequent posts, I feel kinda selfish. I know that the people who were at my meeting really wanted to help - and help ME. I guess that is part of what scared me so much. I just wasn't ready to take on a whole new set of people. It was too small of a group to be "anonymous". There definately was a lot of love in the room and a lot of sincere hearts.

I'll probably go back to that group to say thank you. Who knows maybe I'll want to stay there too once I've been sober long enough.

In the meantime, I'm using SR as my meeting and my major support system. Here it is like a meeting 24-7 and there is help at a click of a button. Thank God for you guys!

caitlin666

:ghug3

Omega Man

B'sT - Let's just say I understand completely and I've stated many times that I'm not even sure if AA is for me or if I'm getting much out of it but for now I'm giving it every chance. I've tried a bunch of meetings in our area and some I'm certain I will never go to again.

That being said, since your a stones throw from me, you may want to give this one a shot tonight or next Friday. It's every Friday night, very eclectic group, a lot of fun, it's been perfect for me.
It's a late 20's something crowd, with a lot of us Gen-X people throwin' in, I'm 38; I'll be a greeter at the door tonight - my name is Steve.

MISSION VIEJO

8:30 PM COUCH MEETING,26001 Muirlands Blvd @ La Paz (Shepherd of the Hills Church) (922-A1)

Jersey Nonny

Hi, Steve! That sounds like "my kind of meeting"...although, I can't remember any I absolutely hated or wouldn't have gone back to.

mikel60

"But what gets me about the meetings are the people who have been in recovery for 20 some odd years. I know I'm a newbie, but isn't there ever a time that you are well enough that you DON"T have to go?"

I've been sober 12 years next Sunday. I keep going because I am obligated to try to give back what was given to me, or I could lose it. My account is in arrears. I have gotten so much I'd like to help others get the same. Plus, I kinda like going.
Mike

Jersey Nonny

Yes, Mike...you reminded me of such an important part of the 12 Step AA Program of Recovery...to give back what was so freely given to me. It's called "passing it on", Newbies.

lark265

Tyger:
As they say, "I can relate." I "should" be going to meetings 3 or 4 times a week, but I really just go about once every month or two.....I'm not really sure why that is......AA was OK for me in the past (I have 12 years sober). But I can't even force myself to go now. When I've mentioned this to my therapist and others, one of the first things they've suggested in Rational Recovery. I'm thinking they say that b/c they may doubt my belief in a higher power.....I did look into RR and found it OK, but not great. I guess people on this site are just trying to be helpful when they say, "Just go back to meetings." But that doesn't really address the matter.....I WOULD go if I wanted to. I know I'm in a bit of a dry drunk...but not in danger to drink. I also despised the "sunshine unicorns" at meetings....but I think I was jealous of the peace they seemed to have....with my therapist, I'm trying to locate my inner reasons for the reluctance......and I also pray about it.....thanks a lot for your post, it helped.......best of luck.

NoelleR

Originally Posted by Mikel60--
"But what gets me about the meetings are the people who have been in recovery for 20 some odd years. I know I'm a newbie, but isn't there ever a time that you are well enough that you DON"T have to go?"

I've been sober 12 years next Sunday. I keep going because I am obligated to try to give back what was given to me, or I could lose it. My account is in arrears. I have gotten so much I'd like to help others get the same. Plus, I kinda like going.
Mike"

Originally Posted by Jersey Nonny--
"Yes, Mike...you reminded me of such an important part of the 12 Step AA Program of Recovery...to give back what was so freely given to me. It's called "passing it on", Newbies."

Well there ya go.....two very good reasons to keep going....but not for me...I believe I'm in between Mikel and Jersey in having 21 years... perfectly content, lovin' life, and havin' a great life too......

...and as for 'giving back'...? I've found it easy to give back ..... at bus stops (especially the one closest to my home, which is smack dab in front of a parole office...lol), on the bus, in the grocery line, at the gas station.....there are innumerable opportunities to 'pass it on' and for me the part of the 12th step that says "...carry this message to alcoholics..." means that I 'go out' and carry the message and not sit in a room waitin' for folks to come to me....I've found there are plenty of good, strong sober folks in the rooms already (they really don't miss me there), so I don't feel I'm letting anyone down.....although when I do drop into the ole meeting place I get a bit irked by those who consistantly say: "Wow, we thought you'd gone back out..." lol

So......go to meetings, or don't.....give it away....or don't (not my call for anyone but moi).......BUT ........ be happy!!!!! (o:


NoelleR

Jersey Nonny

In my case, they probably think I died!

Although I'm no longer able to get to regular AA meetings, I try to drop into SR every day, and "pass it on" here. In addition, you'd be surprised (or maybe not) at how many I come in contact with at this nursing home who have an addict or alcoholic they're dealing with. I guess there are many ways of carrying the message.

NoelleR

Hey Jersey ----

"...although when I do drop into the ole meeting place I get a bit irked by those who consistantly say: "Wow, we thought you'd gone back out..." lol..."

NoelleR

Hey Jersey ----

Originally Posted by NoelleR--
"...although when I do drop into the ole meeting place I get a bit irked by those who consistantly say: "Wow, we thought you'd gone back out..." lol..."

When you replied to my statement (above) with, "...In my case, they probably think I died!..."

I really had to laugh/big chuckle/gaffaw....etc. I believe you have me by a few years (both navel & recovery), but, I absolutely gettit.... (o:

I recently moved into a Seniors apartment complex (55+ and above); a friend of mine moaned...., "What are you gonna do wid all dem old folks?" My response to her was simple, "Heck, the age minimum is 55, and I'm goin' on 62; I think I qualify.....lol"

Youse all have a great day, guys 'n gals..... (o:


NoelleR

Freedom1990

I like that technique, Kevin!

As for why the 'oldtimers' continue to go, well, if it works, why not?!

I got complacent, terminally unique, and just had to go back out and experiment some more with the alcohol after 4 years sober.

Needless to say, that experiment failed miserably.

The alcoholic is still in the back of my brain, doing push-ups, just waiting for me to screw up.

Meetings are just one of the ways I can pass on what was so freely given to me.

Lauriejess

"Sunshine shooting out their asses"

That's pretty funny:rof