...I'm back for awhile, the Queen of Vodka :-(...
tangled up in blue
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: MA
Posts: 401
...I'm back for awhile, the Queen of Vodka :-(...
Hi everyone. I'm not sure if there are still people here that I know. I come and go sometimes but this time I am going to stay for awhile. I was better for a bit but somehow I always go back to drinking. A couple of nights ago, I went out with my good friend for her birthday. We went to two different bars. We both got very drunk at the second one and I almost got into a fight with my exboyfriend's wife. This wasn't on purpose. When she came into the bar, I was talking to my ex because I hadn't seen him in a very long time and I grabbed his arm, not realizing it. She came over and told me she was gonna' kill me. Whatever. This bar is the trashiest bar in my town; the first sight I saw when walking in was this half-naked chic all over the bar. Needless to say, I really drank way too much...at least as much as I used to. I made a lot of stupid calls to people, too and went on the mic and almost got into another fight. Ay, this is horrible. I just want to be done with alcohol.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 32
Hi there
I'm new here so you wouldnt know me..I am all too familar with the humiliation that goes along with booze. The other night I found out my current boyfriend who 5 days ago told me he wanted to move in with me and buy a house, was sleeping with his ex, trying to get her back.. Telling her lies about us as well as telling me lies about them..I was with him for 6 months..Very shortly after I had a stillborn baby from a man who left me. TO make a long story short, this guy manipulated me, made me trust him. He promised me all the things that I lost and then betrayed me. I couldnt take anymore of being treated like crap so I snapped. I got loaded, which is so common for me, and went to his ex's ..She wanted me to come over and clear the air. When I got there he was there. He told me he wished I was dead, and that when I drive home, he was praying that I get in a car accident. I couldnt handle how bad that hurt, I punched him right in the face, then he threw me accross the room into the coffee table. I left, went home and called the cops. They showed up the next day at work, he works there too. And since I hit him first, I got charged with assault. NICE eh. I lowered myself to that dirtbags level. Mortified myself over someone like that. So now, after all I've done for him, I look like the total psycho. All because of liquer. Everyone at work knows. I can't take another second of embarrassing myself because of booze. This time I want to stay sober for good. I hope my story helps to show you that your're not alone in this..I dont know what it is with women, booze and humiliation...
take care
I'm new here so you wouldnt know me..I am all too familar with the humiliation that goes along with booze. The other night I found out my current boyfriend who 5 days ago told me he wanted to move in with me and buy a house, was sleeping with his ex, trying to get her back.. Telling her lies about us as well as telling me lies about them..I was with him for 6 months..Very shortly after I had a stillborn baby from a man who left me. TO make a long story short, this guy manipulated me, made me trust him. He promised me all the things that I lost and then betrayed me. I couldnt take anymore of being treated like crap so I snapped. I got loaded, which is so common for me, and went to his ex's ..She wanted me to come over and clear the air. When I got there he was there. He told me he wished I was dead, and that when I drive home, he was praying that I get in a car accident. I couldnt handle how bad that hurt, I punched him right in the face, then he threw me accross the room into the coffee table. I left, went home and called the cops. They showed up the next day at work, he works there too. And since I hit him first, I got charged with assault. NICE eh. I lowered myself to that dirtbags level. Mortified myself over someone like that. So now, after all I've done for him, I look like the total psycho. All because of liquer. Everyone at work knows. I can't take another second of embarrassing myself because of booze. This time I want to stay sober for good. I hope my story helps to show you that your're not alone in this..I dont know what it is with women, booze and humiliation...
take care
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: MA.
Posts: 1,719
I remember you...
I am glad you made it back to us...
What can you do this time that will safeguard your sobriety? It looks like you have suffered enough, it looks like your not in denial, do you want to be sober MORE than anything else?
Thinking of you...:ghug2
I am glad you made it back to us...
What can you do this time that will safeguard your sobriety? It looks like you have suffered enough, it looks like your not in denial, do you want to be sober MORE than anything else?
Thinking of you...:ghug2
61'st day sober as of:12/18/07
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Casper, Wyoming U.S.
Posts: 241
Somehow, some way, somewhere down the family tree of humanity, we MUST be twins!. I say this because you sound exactly like me (phone calls, almost getting into it with other people, saying stupid things, etc) and yet I just CAN'T seem to stay away from the frosties no matter how hard I try and even though I'm always "gonna definately quit this time". It sucks I know. Be strong. Hang out here. There are a lot of great people here who have been there and understand 
Need4Change
Need4Change
tangled up in blue
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: MA
Posts: 401
Need4Change, maybe we are twins. LOL. I always, always make really stupid phone calls, e-mails, and even letters when I'm drunk. Once I wrote a letter to my ex and went to the post office when I was drunk to find a mail box. I'm not even kidding. How horrible, lol. Basically I know this has to be it for me.
61'st day sober as of:12/18/07
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Casper, Wyoming U.S.
Posts: 241
Wow, I know what you mean there!. I once called up a lawyer's office and had a go at him while I was very drunk. A few days later, you can imagine the result (it was'nt a fun one!). Another time I called a MAJOR retail store and they accused me of...well...it was very serious (but either I did'nt say what they claimed I said or don't remember or it was a misunderstanding). I also became estranged from my family for a long time over drunken rampages I would have when I'd "get lonely" during my binges. I've also thought I was "Tarzan" and climbed a few very tall and dangerous trees while drunk (it's a miracle I did'nt break my neck). Lot's of other nutty things too. Alcohol lowers our inhibitions and makes us take risks. Like when I nearly broke my toe the other day while kicking a case of beer that was sitting on the floor, missed and kicked a sharp part of the stove instead. I was "p*ssed" at the beer for making me an alcoholic. On and on the madness goes. Good luck!
Need4Change
Need4Change
Forum Leader
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Scottsdale, AZ, one big happy dysfunctional family!
Posts: 23,031
Hi B To B! Good to see you back here, haven't forgotten you, and always hope you keep coming back until the miracle happens. But I also hope you come up with a good plan for your recovery this time, cuz while you were "out there" quite a few people have managed to stay clean and sober. Sadly, some who go out never make it back. Keep posting here, OK?
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