I think I might need a little SR srtength to keep me strong
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: wherever my feet take me
Posts: 1,314
I know what you all must be thinking due to ym sudden dissapearing act.
No I didnt do anything to regret. Jon came home and I think he was drinking or something, but he doent usualyy get runk. All I know he was in maniac mode calling me names. I was just in no mood. I was alreadt crying and couldnt take anymore BS. So I left It was a long cold night. I bundled up went to the park and cried myself to sleep iside this tube the kids play in. I came back here around 7am or so. he was sleeping i plopped myself on the couch and went back to sleep. when he got up he acted like nothing happened actually tried to hug me. I told him to get the f away from me and that one of these days Im gonna f him up. He laughs and walks away. What an ass. Anyway he is out now.
The first thing i did this morning was to go online and check housing authority , HUD, and got a list of shelters. This place is just so not working for me.
So here i am still crying. Im trying to go through whatever things i have left and get rid of even more. Between being homeless and bouncing from house to house there really isnt much left. I guess Ill box up things I cant replace and for evrything else I will have to start all over again.
I will be online for as long as I can beforre he comes home I could use to ralk. Please if anyone can spare some time.
No I didnt do anything to regret. Jon came home and I think he was drinking or something, but he doent usualyy get runk. All I know he was in maniac mode calling me names. I was just in no mood. I was alreadt crying and couldnt take anymore BS. So I left It was a long cold night. I bundled up went to the park and cried myself to sleep iside this tube the kids play in. I came back here around 7am or so. he was sleeping i plopped myself on the couch and went back to sleep. when he got up he acted like nothing happened actually tried to hug me. I told him to get the f away from me and that one of these days Im gonna f him up. He laughs and walks away. What an ass. Anyway he is out now.
The first thing i did this morning was to go online and check housing authority , HUD, and got a list of shelters. This place is just so not working for me.
So here i am still crying. Im trying to go through whatever things i have left and get rid of even more. Between being homeless and bouncing from house to house there really isnt much left. I guess Ill box up things I cant replace and for evrything else I will have to start all over again.
I will be online for as long as I can beforre he comes home I could use to ralk. Please if anyone can spare some time.
not a greeter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: padmasana
Posts: 13,927
Sorry you spent the night outside... glad you spent it without using. Looking into someplace else to stay is very wise. Staying clean will make it easier to find a place... believe it. I'm on for a little bit longer so either post or pm me if you want 
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Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,477
Beth, I think you're making a good choice for yourself. You've had endless problems with your home situation and I think you will be moving forward if you get into a shelter. They will help you to get on your feet again.
Hang in there and check in when you can.
Hang in there and check in when you can.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: wherever my feet take me
Posts: 1,314
Im so scared and heartbroken about probably losing my cat. My baby boy. the thing that kept me fighting.
If it hadnt been for my concern for him I dont think I would have kept going.
I know whats right for me but i dont know if I can leave him.
My friend once offered to give me $1000 to help get me started, but i started using again. I think it is time to talk to her again. Its just that I have gone up and down so many times I dont know if sh etrustes me. And even if she gets me set up wil I be able to maintain.
Im thinking if I was in my own I would function better cause I would have peace of mind no stress I can rest when I need to. No added negative energy.
If I wasnt so depressed all the time aI probably could hold a FT job.
I need the chance to try.
If it hadnt been for my concern for him I dont think I would have kept going.
I know whats right for me but i dont know if I can leave him.
My friend once offered to give me $1000 to help get me started, but i started using again. I think it is time to talk to her again. Its just that I have gone up and down so many times I dont know if sh etrustes me. And even if she gets me set up wil I be able to maintain.
Im thinking if I was in my own I would function better cause I would have peace of mind no stress I can rest when I need to. No added negative energy.
If I wasnt so depressed all the time aI probably could hold a FT job.
I need the chance to try.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: wherever my feet take me
Posts: 1,314
If I get rid of the cat I might be able to move in with mom, but that means moving to another state and leaving not only my cat but my best friend behind. which is something unimaginable to me.
I have to talk to roe and see if we cant work something out to just get me a room somewhere. I dont need alot of space just space of my own. a place to hear my own thoughts. A pLace where I have some chance of getting a peaceful state of mind.
I have to talk to roe and see if we cant work something out to just get me a room somewhere. I dont need alot of space just space of my own. a place to hear my own thoughts. A pLace where I have some chance of getting a peaceful state of mind.
not a greeter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: padmasana
Posts: 13,927
You have options as long as you're sober. You have some calls you can make and some places you can go, so that has to be a little stress off you until you figure it out. You may not be happy right now but I bet once you really sit down and figure out the best place for you to be... you will be feeling a lot better.
I wouldn't go ripping off your skin though... it is cold out there tonight
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I wouldn't go ripping off your skin though... it is cold out there tonight
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not a greeter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: padmasana
Posts: 13,927
Don't be ripping off your head either! You'll need it sooner or later . I'm taking off for tonight. Hang tight Beth... really try to go to sleep and get some rest. You can make some calls to your friend tomorrow or talk to your mom. The other places will be open. You can't do much right now on a Sunday night except stay put, and sober. Check in tomorrow. I'll be back to check in on you then .
. I'm taking off for tonight. Hang tight Beth... really try to go to sleep and get some rest. You can make some calls to your friend tomorrow or talk to your mom. The other places will be open. You can't do much right now on a Sunday night except stay put, and sober. Check in tomorrow. I'll be back to check in on you then .
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