odaat

Today marks 11 months sober. With the support from AA, I'm managing not to drink. I'm also managing with not over-eating.

I'm struggling with self-harm though. 4 slips in 2 weeks. Thats after 10 months without, which was after 5 years without. It just seems to be spiralling and I can't seem to get it under control.

I'm worried that it'll keep getting worse. I feel that if I had a support network like I have in AA, I'd be alright. I don't have anyone I can talk to or call when I feel like self-harming.

11 months is quite a long time, and I'm grateful for that.

Rowan

Congratulations on your 11 months - and I appreciate your honesty about the self-harm. I'm glad you're talking about it.

RK2007

11 months is a long time, in fact it's fantastic - I had my last drink only last Thursday, 11 months seems so far away - you're doing really fantastic on that front, so you have real strength somewhere inside you...

I don't know anything about self-harm, apart from the self-harm of abusing alcohol - but you must have the strength somewhere to fight it if you can stay sober for 11 months!!!

I wish you all the very best with that odaat, I wish I could say something better to help - but stay strong and keep trying to fight it...

Vincent.

barb dwyer

odaat 0-

hang in ...

this sounds like the disease is taking a sidestep.

if we can't drink - we use. If we can't use - we eat. If we can't eat - we have sex. If we can't find anyone for that - we gamble. If we can't find that - we cut and burn.

See the spiral?

I know you're under a lot of pressure - there's step one ... STEP TWO ... THEN STEP THREE.

As far as being able to DO anything about anything ... that's ... all there is.

What's your sponsor say?

It's still the same disease.

odaat

I've not been able to talk to my sponsor for a few days, as she is on holiday.

barb dwyer

ok then -

my sponsor goes out of town a good bit certain times of the year as well. I've set myself up wiwth 'step-sponsors' ... others with quite a bit of sobriety who I can call if I can't find her.

There's your task.

We're here, too!

odaat

Only problem is, it always happens at night, when its too late to phone people :-/

CarolD

Congratulations on your sober time!

Blessings

indigo

Congratulations on your sober time, and welcome to SR. I'm sorry you're self-harming and I'm glad you've brought it out into the open. Perhaps you can PM 'Done with it' she has lots of ES&H and will be most helpful to you.
hugs

Anna

Good for you Odaat!

I understand your concern the self-harm and I can't offer any advice except to say, that you'll be able to deal with this, just as you dealt with your alcoholism.

Budd

Congratulations on the 11 months sober. If you can do that you can do anything.

Missymae737

Hi,

The friends I have, (AA), I can call anytime there is an urgency about whatever...

Thinking of you...

tanyapmc

Congrats on you time! Maybe you can get some numbers of people who do not mind you calling at all hours.

parentrecovers

odaat....support out. private counsel is a good solution. and keep reaching out here - we're listening. hugs, k

wiscgirl30

Hi Odaat...have you tried a self-injury forum? Dont know if it will help, but here is one site I found...

http://www.facetheissue.com/communit...splay.php?f=15

So glad you are staying sober... good for you!

GrouchoTheCat

Hi ODAAT,

11 months is a tough time to be, kind of like anniversary anxiety.

I do know folks in AA that I can call any time of the day or night.

I wish you the best,

Ted

odaat

I'll ask around to see if anyone would mind being called late at night. I did ask one lady and she was only available till 9pm.

I found it incredibly difficult to ask for numbers. I've managed to ask one person for a home phone number - every gives out mobile numbers and I can't afford to phone them.

I've only ever managed to make one phonecall, and luckily she didn't answer. I don't know how to get over the fear of phoning people. When I'm really low, I'm unlikely to be able to have a conversation, all I can do is cry.

bugsworth

odaat, I feel you pain and it is so scary to watch you go thru this. Please forgive me if I step out of line, but you need to get some profesional help. ASAP! You problems are not just alcohol related, they are bigger than that. You state that you have harmed yourself 4 times in 2 weeks....please seek outside help...you can get well...you can do this, but not alone.

odaat

I should be seeing a pyschiartist in about 4 weeks. I don't know of any other help/support that I could get before then. The appointment was further off than it is now, but they fast-tracked it after the first case of self-harm.

wiscgirl30

You might want to try just a regular "counselor." They are MUCH easier to get an appt with than an actual psychiatrist.

Wish I was in England - you could call me any time of the night. Well, you still could but that would probably be pretty expensive.