Hi again - Big day 4 me today, i'm telling my parents i'm an alcoholic. - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
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Old 10-18-2007, 04:11 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Hi again - Big day 4 me today, i'm telling my parents i'm an alcoholic.


Hello all,
Well it's been a while since i've been on here, missed it! Just been v busy with uni, meetings etc. But it's good to be back- find this place really helpful- thanks to all the ppl So yeah....today is a bit of a nerve wracking day for me. I'm going to tell my parents. I've decided it's around time now. I've been sober 24 days now and keeping it from them isn't easy- im up in Glasgow and they're in nottinghm so it's not as hard as it could be, but im still having to keep such a huge part of my life now from them. They are both in AA to. My dad's been sober over 40 years and my mum just over 20 so if anyone can help me it's them! But i've just been so scared of telling them, mainly because im worried that they'll worry lol! I honestly am doing ok - it's bloody hard but i can manage it, and i hate the thought of them being all that way away and worrying . But it's got to be done. Last night i was very close to drinking again- i was not in a good place in my head, doing my 1st step this fri though so hopefully starting the steps will help get things better. Well anyways i just thought i'd share this, will let u know how it all goes, hope everyone isok :praying
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Old 10-18-2007, 04:14 AM   #2 (permalink)
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That's great news good for you mandi and congratulations on your 24 days you're rocking.
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Old 10-18-2007, 04:23 AM   #3 (permalink)
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I was terrified of telling my Mum, she has been in AA for 18 years or so. She was actually really great about it, gave me a lot of advice and I could ask lots of questions that I felt were too small or silly to ask people at the meetings.

Before I told her, I discussed it with some AA people who said that parents deal with the possibility of passing the disease on to thier children quite early on, and that it wouldn't worry my Mum or upset her.

Hope it goes well for you, let us know how it goes
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Old 10-18-2007, 04:23 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Old 10-18-2007, 04:23 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Old 10-18-2007, 07:09 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Mandi if both your parents are in AA then I have a very strong feeling they will be releived to find you in the rooms. With over 60 years of sobriety between the 2 of them I doubt very seriously if they were not already aware you were an alcoholic before you did!

Will they worry? Look a parents primary job is to worry about their kids!!! I have 6, with an equal # of grandkids with more on the way and I worry about them all, I do not obsess about it because it is out my hands.

Parents worry about their kids, alcoholic or not. My son is an alcoholic, I was elated when he finally admitted it, he is sober now and if he stays that way will enjoy far more years sober then I ever will.

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Last night i was very close to drinking again- i was not in a good place in my head, doing my 1st step this fri though so hopefully starting the steps will help get things better.
Did you call your sponsor or anyone else in the program? Strong urges usually do not last that long unless you give in, then they will last just long enough to take that first drink which leads to another drunk. A simple phone call to someone in the program will get one by that urge a lot quicker and easier then trying to tough it out on your own.

BTW once you tell your parents that will open the door for you calling them when the urge hits!!!

Oh yea I forgot to mention that the steps lead to the miracle!
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Old 10-18-2007, 07:22 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Hey all, thanks for your comments and support - tazman i didn't call anyone as i started getting them about 2 hours before m,y mtng so i thought i'd leave it. My sponser is ill too so she hasnt been answering phone much but has kept in touch daily. I knew i should of rung someone else though- i knew it was a very silly and risky place for me to be, and i guess u r right i should of simply rung someone, next time i will be sure to! Thanks as well for your positive comments on my parents reactions- will be speaking to my mum in the next 10 mins, when she finished work, feel sick Oh well this has got to be done. Thanks too to ODAAT- it made me feel a lil better when i read your comment about your mum being cool with it and how u were scared too- makes me realise this is all part of recovery and many have to do it etc. Well folks i'll let u know how it goes.
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Old 10-18-2007, 07:31 AM   #8 (permalink)
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I think you will be very happy you told your parents. Who better to support you? That is great.
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Old 10-18-2007, 08:03 AM   #9 (permalink)
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That's what it is when others know! Your parents will be able to help you and share things with you they might not have before. Hopefully they'll talk about what it was like back in their younger drinking days - and the fact that you can all compare notes will make it less complicated for you. No more pretending & trying to hide it. I wish my mom could relate somehow - it's driven a huge wedge between us, her not understanding why I can't "Just Say No". I'm happy for you Mandi - your whole life is waiting for you & you'll be doing it all clear-headed & open-eyed!
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Old 10-18-2007, 11:40 AM   #10 (permalink)
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be sure to post and let us know how the conversation goes? i'm proud of you for staying sober and reaching out to your family. you're making great strides in your recovery. hugs, k
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Old 10-18-2007, 11:56 AM   #11 (permalink)
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hey mandi - congrats on the 24 days! i remember when i had to tell my folks i am an alcoholic. they are divorced so i had to make 2 calls. my mom was definitely worried but she has been very supportive. my dad, who is an alcoholic himself even though he won't admit it was less supportive so needless to say i dont talk to him because it just makes me want to drink so i avoid that trigger. good luck and keep us posted
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