New here and hard to maintain willpower
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 3
New here and hard to maintain willpower
Ok, so I'm Joe, 22, and I had an alcohol dependency problem for 3 years. I never went to meetings and managed to push it off and manage to keep drinking in actual normal amounts (average 1-2 a week) with no issues for the last 3 years.
Currently stress is getting to me, I have a good job and work full time but am forced to take classes I've already taken twice a week for work and I drive and endless almost 450 miles a week. I spend a lot of time with my girlfriend, and it helps, but her issues have been pressing on me and other stresses with finances and the holidays are wearing me down. She just got "probably" unemployed and is seeking work and would love for me to be a roommate to help out. I live with my parents and no matter how I cram the numbers it wouldn't seem to work out well financially for me and would lead to about the same amount of driving. Her depression and situation goes on to me and just working and living with that and not going out much makes life boring and miserable.
I don't like the options I have and there are nights where I just feel like hitting the bottle to go to sleep while I think about how to maintain our relationship.
Arg.
So hello!
Currently stress is getting to me, I have a good job and work full time but am forced to take classes I've already taken twice a week for work and I drive and endless almost 450 miles a week. I spend a lot of time with my girlfriend, and it helps, but her issues have been pressing on me and other stresses with finances and the holidays are wearing me down. She just got "probably" unemployed and is seeking work and would love for me to be a roommate to help out. I live with my parents and no matter how I cram the numbers it wouldn't seem to work out well financially for me and would lead to about the same amount of driving. Her depression and situation goes on to me and just working and living with that and not going out much makes life boring and miserable.
I don't like the options I have and there are nights where I just feel like hitting the bottle to go to sleep while I think about how to maintain our relationship.
Arg.
So hello!
believer
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Europe
Posts: 2,411
This a wonderful place for support...
Welcome Joe... i am 22 too.. I suffer from depression. I can surely relate. I can also relate to the use of the bottle when the times get tough, because i abused pills and alcohol a few times.. I go to college and truth be told i barely have the strength to get out of the house. It also makes it harder that i depend on and live with my parents.
You know, i am going to tell you what i was told once i got here..They told me that if i got it together at this age it would be a huge blessing..I am still trying and they were right..
keep posting!
Welcome Joe... i am 22 too.. I suffer from depression. I can surely relate. I can also relate to the use of the bottle when the times get tough, because i abused pills and alcohol a few times.. I go to college and truth be told i barely have the strength to get out of the house. It also makes it harder that i depend on and live with my parents.
You know, i am going to tell you what i was told once i got here..They told me that if i got it together at this age it would be a huge blessing..I am still trying and they were right..
keep posting!
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Welcome to SR!
Not all loves are forever...
perhaps this is not the time for you to be involved.
Stress and love are not a good combination.
Just my experienc and observation.
Not all loves are forever...
perhaps this is not the time for you to be involved.
Stress and love are not a good combination.
Just my experienc and observation.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,473
Hi Joe,
You said the stress is getting to you and causing you to drink too much. And, it sounds like a good amount of the stress in your life is coming from the issues with your girlfriend. It seems to me this is a situation that you have to think over and figure out the best thing for you to do. To me, it sounds like she is putting a lot of pressure on you - financially and emotionally. Maybe you could have a talk with her and explain that the stress is affecting you or maybe it's not meant to be.
You said the stress is getting to you and causing you to drink too much. And, it sounds like a good amount of the stress in your life is coming from the issues with your girlfriend. It seems to me this is a situation that you have to think over and figure out the best thing for you to do. To me, it sounds like she is putting a lot of pressure on you - financially and emotionally. Maybe you could have a talk with her and explain that the stress is affecting you or maybe it's not meant to be.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 3
Ah things stink thinking about this.
Her situation is pushing me to possibly make a decision or a commitment I'm not ready to make yet financially.
I have yet to even really drink just for fear of letting myself get sucked into it again.
If it wasn't for the money issue things would be great. I've still got my stack of bills that make moving out currently impossible or very painful (I don't like living on Ramien noodles and living paycheck to paycheck). Why can't things like this happen two years down the road when money isn't an issue.
Her situation is pushing me to possibly make a decision or a commitment I'm not ready to make yet financially.
I have yet to even really drink just for fear of letting myself get sucked into it again.
If it wasn't for the money issue things would be great. I've still got my stack of bills that make moving out currently impossible or very painful (I don't like living on Ramien noodles and living paycheck to paycheck). Why can't things like this happen two years down the road when money isn't an issue.
1 bite&all resistance crumbles
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: IRELAND
Posts: 2,208
Originally Posted by CarolD 
They can. It's all about wwise choices Joe.
Good luck!
Cathy31
x
Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: scottsdale arizona
Posts: 21
Easy Does It...Just for today, my thoughts will be on my recovery living and enjoying life...without the use of drugs or alcohol. We all have our own backpack to carry in life,If my own backpack is already a heavyload for me, why would i want to pickup and carry another backpack too.Take care of yourself first, then you will have something to offer another.Your girlfriend can find another job or another roomate.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Madison
Posts: 131
I understand your feelings. Every time I got alot of stress on me I would turn to the bottle. To me that only made the stress worse for me. Maybe going to some counseling would help and sitting down with your girlfriend and have a heart to heart talk may help. Goodluck and keep posting alot of support here.
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