taltalonet

hi ...
i was here last month...didnt go to the aa meeting...cuz my friends told me that im not an alcholic ...(yhe right ) i was lerning on psychology class that there is 3 step..use ..abuse and addiction ...i think im between 2-3 step ...anyway ..i started to exercise for the marathon race(im a runner) (the race is 10 of jenuary) and i promise to my self that i will quit drinking for the next three month . cuz its going to be dangerous for my liver (glycogen store) and insted of quiting i started to drink every evning and even smoke 4 cigarette (i quit smoke last year)
what the hell is happning wite me??????
h--e--l--p--!!

Anna

Well, I'd say what is happening is that when you tell yourself you're going to quit, your disease goes into overdrive and says, oh no you don't. The alcoholic mind is very difficult to silence and it is going to fight back. If you believe you're an alcoholic, then that's all that matters. And, alcholics can't drink. Training for the marathon is a great and it can help you focus on good health. Keep reading and posting.

GlassPrisoner

I raced Mountain Bikes semi pro for 5 years while working full time, going to college, and supporting a family and household.

It worked, for a while. Eventually I quit training and started drinking again. This time the drinking lasted 10 years and I gave everything away.

The only thing I've found that works is AA. I'm going on a year now, and I've never been more comfortable or at ease.

taltalonet

i realy belive im a strong person (im drunk now) i cant undrstend why im abusing my self ..i want to go up ...but instend (like now) im feeling as much as i want o go up the most im going down ...it isnt logic...am i crazy???????

scamuel

I was told that if you dont stay plugged into recovery your mind and addiction (like a demon) gets the best of you. Meetings help and getting a sponser. I think alot of us are strong people but we isolate ourselves and thats a perfect breeding ground for the demon to overtake and put us back in our diasease. (spelling).

It doesnt matter how smart or how tough we are the addiction always wins unless we stayed plugged in.

Surlyredhead

No, you are not crazy...you just need support. We are here for you.

Cathy

taltalonet

there is a song say..."my mind play triks on me"...im not a freak cotrol but why i heve al this pain? and i need to drnik? press? im doing yoga and meditation ...trying to live a helthy life...relaxing...but alchol giving the best answer untill the next morning ...and then again guilt hate ...trying to break the circel.. what should i do?

CarolD

Hi again...

1...Don't drink anything for 24 hours.
2. Go to an AA meeting and listen.

Let us know how you are doing
we do understand.

kelsh

Hi taltalonet,

I hope you will read all these posts in the morning when you are sober. I got to the point that I thought that I was just plain crazy because I couldn't quit drinking. But I went for help for my alcoholism and depression and found out the alcohol was making me think crazy thoughts and do crazy things.

I couldn't make a rational decision at this time other than I wanted to be sober more than anything else in my life. I took the help I got seriously and did as was suggested at my AA Meetings...go to meetings, listen, get a sponsor, & work the steps. I had quit drinking once or twice for a year but would start drinking again.

The last time I started drinking was the beginning of a 14 year relapse. That was when I made the final decision to quit.

This took a commitment on my part that I wanted to quit drinking more than anything else in my life. I worked hard to do this. I went to a meeting every night for one solid year. I listened and took to heart what made sense to me and helped me to not pick up that first drink. Without the first drink another one does not follow.

I wish you all the Serenity, Courage, and Wisdom to work this program to the best of YOUR ability. This is just for you!

Love,

kelsh

ANGELINA243

Only you can diagnose youself--whether you are an alcoholic or not.