dave47

Angie tell him if he lays a finger on you again you will have him arrested.What a nasty piece of work,and to threaten to spill the beans about you.Thats a loving partner for you,using blackmail and bullying.Seek help and advice,i know it's easy for outsiders but he's dragging you down and you won't be rid of your demons like this.Everyones got problems,we've got big financial problems but at least we respect each other,best wishes.

parentrecovers

hey angie, you're most likely sleeping now. i just wanted you to know that i'm thinking about you this morning, and have you and your family in my prayers.

hugs out, k

wiscgirl30

Ang, I was in an abusive relationship once, with my children's father. I stayed in it WAY too long and I really regret it, and what I regret even more is letting him get away with it. In the past 14 years since we have broken up, he has beaten at least 5 other different girlfriends, usually ones who are young with low self esteem. I really regret never calling the cops on him and having it on his record. You do NOT deserve to be hit, EVER. And FYI, in the time since we have been broken up, the ONLY time a guy ever hit me was when I was drinking. This says two things: 1. We are out of control when we are drinking and cause drama. 2. We think we deserved it so we let them do it. There is NO WAY, when I am sober, I would EVER let a man hit me and get away with it. That is a good reason to stay sober right there....to be in control of yourself and your situation.

Tazman53

Angie right now I am biting my tongue........ even when I was drinking and got mad I may have said some mean things, but I maintained my manhood!!!

Men DO NOT hit women!!! People should not hit people, but as I said REAL Men DO NOT hit women!!!

Seeing a male (Notice I did not say man) hit a woman is probably the only reason I would feel no remorse in beating the living snot out of some one.

Okay I feel a little better now. Look up "Spousal abuse" on the internet, his beating you will NEVER get better, it will get worse and will happen more often.

Think about your children!!!! Do you want Ben to beat his wife? Well guess what? I will bet money that your husbands father beat his mom!

Do you think that your children do not know he beats you? I can assure you they do!

Did you know that due to your husband beating you that your daughter is very likely to wind up being abused by her spouse?

Hon if you really love your kids you will save them from a future of hell by getting out now.

Your drinking will not do near the damage to your children that your husband beating you will do.

scaredykat

Hi Angie, Just wondering how you are today.

Barb

angie9

Thankyou everyone .. I wish I was a speed typist as theres so much I want to say but it would take me forever to type. I dont know If Ive said this before but he is bi-pola un medicated as the medication he reakens make him sleepy and when he flares up I feel he excagerates(sp) the situation Its funny Im not worried about money we pay the bills we feed the family quite well and we have sometimes money left over ( notice a bigger saving that Im not buying alcohol all the time!) I want to thankyou all for you kindness and putting up with me I promise I will not put the children in danger he adores Sophie clashes with Holly tho ( typical mouthy teen) but its funny when hes horrid to me hes ultra nice to the kids. Ive explained to the kids him hitting me is wrong and I know it sounds silly selfish(?) that if I leave he has told me he will make my life hell and I dont know if Im strong enough to rise above that threat. I find just talking about it helps me and I might ring a friend today that knows my drama in life tho she will roll her eyes but guess what I DINDT DRINK one up for me!!!! I think he was fully expecting me to hit the bottle as I used to do that in the past like to spite him!
Thankyou so very very much and once again sorry whats that saying ? airing ones dity laundry publically ? but thats me Ive allways being a open book so to speak

Hevyn

First, I'm so glad you felt that you could share this with us - that's so wonderful. Second, Angie I don't say much but I've read your posts and you mean a great deal to me and have helped me with the things you've shared. Third, Everyone's right about this violent behavior - it never just goes away. It escalates and might end up in tragedy. I know you're thinking a drink would help soothe you a bit, but it might lead you into another binge with all that you have on your mind, and you need to be clear headed to sort this all out and plan what you're going to do. Sending prayers your way. Love, Joanie

rloomer

I have a thought on this thread if I may,

I think it won't matter if you quit drinking or not. Not to him. Your are the only one who will care that you've givin up the drink. If he's hitting you over money, he's not only telling you that he's willing to hurt you over something you have to do, He's teaching your children that it's ok to be beaten if you're a girl and it's ok to beat if you're a boy. You have two girls and a boy if I read that correctly.

How sould you feel if your daughter came to you and told you her hubby hit her and spit on her? How degrading.

You need to get out or he's going to get worst. Maybe even to your children.

parentrecovers

sending support out to my friend, angie! hugs, k

scaredykat

How ya doing today Angie?

Barb

angie9

I had a bad night not physical abuse but verbal I might contact womans refuge
He woke me up about 1 in the morning asking me over and over again what am I going to do trouble is when Im scared I cant and dont talk which makes it worse thenwhen he woke up to go to work at 4.30am he woke me up so I could see what its like :0( He then brings all my wrong doings in the past very painful if I did then when I was under the influence then he told me to get a full time job and it has to be well paying job so I can afford childcare for soph with heaps of overtime as Im lazy and Im a user and I sponge off people He told me if I think hes a ****k then why do I mess with him :0( Im numb and scared its actually the verbal abouse I cant stand I mugh rather get clipped over the ear than being told Im lazy hopless dumb what hurts most of all is the last few weeks I was starting to really love him all over again and actually looked forward to him coming home Im confused scared and angry and all I can think about when I went into hospital with attempted suicide that I wish I never regain concious it hurts

Jules62

ang-I don't have much time but here-please call them hon....

Auckalnd Womens Refuge

FOR HELP IN THE AUCKLAND REGION -

Phone 378-1893 24 hour crisis line

TO FIND YOUR LOCAL REFUGE IN OTHER LOCATIONS - www.womensrefuge.org.nz/locate.asp

IF YOU ARE SAFE but seeking information & advice -
Phone Auckland Women's Refuge 378-7635 Monday to Friday 9am to 3pm.

OTHERWISE press 0 to go through to 24 hour crisis line

OR FOR NON URGENT MESSAGE please leave a message after the beep


You need to get support sweetie-this isn't going to go away.

Sending you much love,

Julesxox

rloomer

Time to stand up and walk Angie. Things are not going to get any better. As much as you want to believe they will, they won't. And it's the children that will pay the highest price. I would feel so bad if anything worst happens. take a look at this ans at least read through it please.

http://www.megaessays.com/essay_sear...red_wives.html

angie9

hi rloomer this computors antivirus wont me go there not sure how to change the settings and thanks Jules I was on the womans refuge site Ill give them a ring on monday I dont think my life is in danger and when hes horrid to me hes super nice to the kids as holly says tho shes more frightemed of him like this he does strange things like when I was on the couch he started throwing the clean laundry all over me then poking me :0(

rloomer

Oh Angie,

My heart breaks for you. I wish there were something I can do for you.
If I new where new Zealand was I'd so be there to poke him back.
I bet he wouldn't poke me around.

Sounds like he just needs a good ol' fashion butt kicking

Dee74

oh Ang

please call the refuge. Don't wait til Monday.

It sounds like Chris needs meds for the bi-polar badly, and if he's not prepared to do that, you (and the kids) really are in danger because no-one knows what might happen, least of all Chris.....

I mean both you and Holly are scared *now*, Ang...

Please take care.
D

scaredykat

Be safe Angie. I agree with rloomer. It's time to stand up and walk. This is your life and your kids were talking about.

Steve58

Angie, what the others said. Your story is way to familar, predictable. Please get yourself and your children safe.

Dee said it, "you (and the kids) really are in danger because no-one knows what might happen, least of all Chris....."

Sad, but true, but you are so right, rloomer. Lets go, do you want the Mace, or the baseball bat?

S

rloomer

Nah, I don't need no bat or mace. It's the golden rule. Treat others the way you would have done to you.

I'm gonna just poke him and push him around till he falls then sit on him and spit in his face. And if his face happens to run into my fist, well don't see how that's my fault

Dee74

I know it's a joke, but can we lay off the macho stuff guys ?
Violence is just wrong. Full Stop.

D