closeing chapters
 

Being sobe now for awhile has helped me close alot of bad chapters in my life. Also helps me prepare to close more. There is one that i am haveing a problem with closeing. I lent a friend alot of money and even ordered tires for this friend. This friend also has a credit card in her name and is under my account. she told that she would start paying me back and has not done so yet. Here is the tricky part, I cant contact this person do to a restaining order is in place. I dont know what I should do.Should I just right it off and forget about it, or what and see if this person is going to be an adult and step up to there responsibility to pay me back. This person asked me to leave them alone and I said I would forever and this person stated that they dont want it forever just for alittle while. Well I am much happier without this person in my life, but i am still confused with what to do? Can anyone help?

Hmm, have you considered talking to a lawyer?

If you can prove she made the charges on your account, then she should be held accountable.

Other than that, I guess you'll have to pay it off and let it go.

Hi Shemp,

Personally, I'd let it go. It sounds like you are better off without this person in your life, so I wouldn't risk your sobriety by dwelling on it.

Best,
Rowan

You really need a legal opinion
so as to protect your credit rating.

JMO

I would let it go. Tires are a small price to pay for piece of mind. As for the credit card if it's in your name, you can cancel the account. Have you contacted the cc company and explained the situation?

No i have not yet, Guess letting it go would be the best solution to this situation. You guys are right no reason to dwell on it and risk my sobriety over this. Thank you all for your help and support.

Personally i'd want whats mine back,but if you do so,do it through the correct channels.Don't stew over it though whatever you do,all the best.

Have you spoken to your sponsor? First thing first would be to close all accounts this person has any access to then talk to a lawyer and see if there is anything that can be done.

Have you spoken to your sponsor?

If this has no real effect on your credit or your life it may be best just to let it drop.

Are you wanting to pursue this for revenge or out of need? Resentments are things we need to rid our selfs of, revenge is not a good way to get rid of resentments.

God works in mysterious ways. If it's not a huge amount (to cover the cost of a lawyer) it may be better to cut your losses and put this into a " lessons learned" file.
By doing so, you will be free of this burdon. And maybe someday this person may repay you. That would be a pleasent unexpected suprise.

I just to say thank you to all of you. You all have been very helpful and i appreicaite all the advice. It is nice to be back and have all of your support.

By thoroughly embracing the 12 Steps the Promises tell us that fear of people and economic insecurity will leave us. My experience has proven this to be true.

If the credit card is an issue contact the company and have it cancelled.

I've had a restraining order from my ex-wife, you're not supposed to contact the person who has it against you. I respected that and did not attempt to contact her. To have the willingness and vigilance to honor that is part of practicing the principles I've learned in the program.

Hi.
Every interpersonal situation is unique in it's own way.
When people owe me and they don't make themselves seen I usually let them go. If they want to be mature and correct I believe it's something they have to decided to do on their own, without somebody else having to chase them up and prompt them.
I don't usually lend money nowadays, unless I know it's really essential for them.
That's just my oppinion anyway. At the end of the day you need to weigh out the pros and cons and make your own judgement. Sorry I can't be of more help.