I mean...really!!! what am I thinking???
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: US
Posts: 195
You know, all of you friends here,
It is really hard not to sound "upbeat" and most of life is not "upbeat". Any muscians out there? I guess they might say that without the "downbeat" there is no real "upbeat". I used to know a lot of jazz people In NYC, and it seems that they are either sober or dead now. The best of the lot understood that one must show ones feelings through emotions. Maybe that is why I am drawn here.
So to be honest, I feel better than I did 10 minutes ago, but very unsure that I will make it through today without giving in to drinking.
When is this stupidity going to stop!!!
Alyce
It is really hard not to sound "upbeat" and most of life is not "upbeat". Any muscians out there? I guess they might say that without the "downbeat" there is no real "upbeat". I used to know a lot of jazz people In NYC, and it seems that they are either sober or dead now. The best of the lot understood that one must show ones feelings through emotions. Maybe that is why I am drawn here.
So to be honest, I feel better than I did 10 minutes ago, but very unsure that I will make it through today without giving in to drinking.
When is this stupidity going to stop!!!
Alyce
Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: London
Posts: 345
Hi Alyce,
Believe me that I know exactly how you are feeling.
The fact that you keep on fighting this suggests to me that in the end you will get a lasting recovery. From your posts I sense frustration but not defeat. Just keep trying - pick yourself up and give it your best shot. Who knows, this time could be the one ..
Believe me that I know exactly how you are feeling.
The fact that you keep on fighting this suggests to me that in the end you will get a lasting recovery. From your posts I sense frustration but not defeat. Just keep trying - pick yourself up and give it your best shot. Who knows, this time could be the one ..
Member
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: my room in ct.
Posts: 58,110
alyce, ever here the term from a drummer, or a bass player...
'' In the Pocket! "
i apply that term in my recovery..
recovery in one pocket, life in another...
all good wishes alyce...
xxoo, sticks z
'' In the Pocket! "
i apply that term in my recovery..
recovery in one pocket, life in another...
all good wishes alyce...
xxoo, sticks z
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: US
Posts: 195
Had a hellish day in NYC yesterday; Bush and Ahmadinajhad. What a mess. Plus all those errant people talking on their cell phones.
So selfish of me to regard all this as a problem because it was talking time away from my drinking to get to a bar.
WTF??
No, I did not make it again yesterday but I must be drinking less because there is no hangover this morning. Maybe I can get some real work done. I had better. Don't want to lose anything more here.
There is a meeting at noon; send all your good vibes that I go.
Alyce
So selfish of me to regard all this as a problem because it was talking time away from my drinking to get to a bar.
WTF??
No, I did not make it again yesterday but I must be drinking less because there is no hangover this morning. Maybe I can get some real work done. I had better. Don't want to lose anything more here.
There is a meeting at noon; send all your good vibes that I go.
Alyce
Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: London
Posts: 345
Hi Alyce,
I know what you are going through. Its tough.
Just aske yourself fo you want to go to the meeting or do you need to go? If you want to go it will be easy. If you just feel you need to be there, no amount of positive thinking in the world will get you to walk in there if you choose not to.
I have learned that now. Others wanted me to stop drinking and I tried to for them. I couldnt do it. Getting through a couple of days was the best I could manage This time I truly wanted it for myself because I wanted to be happy again. Not for anyone else but just for me. I quit for selfish reasons and you know what? Its sticking this time.
You need to become selfish. If what you want to do is drink then best you get on and do it. When you truly want to stop the sacrifice you need to make and the steps you must take come easily.
I know what you are going through. Its tough.
Just aske yourself fo you want to go to the meeting or do you need to go? If you want to go it will be easy. If you just feel you need to be there, no amount of positive thinking in the world will get you to walk in there if you choose not to.
I have learned that now. Others wanted me to stop drinking and I tried to for them. I couldnt do it. Getting through a couple of days was the best I could manage This time I truly wanted it for myself because I wanted to be happy again. Not for anyone else but just for me. I quit for selfish reasons and you know what? Its sticking this time.
You need to become selfish. If what you want to do is drink then best you get on and do it. When you truly want to stop the sacrifice you need to make and the steps you must take come easily.
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