aasharon90

Hi Im Sharon and Im an Alcoholic.

By the Grace of my HP and people
like you here in SR I havent had a
drink of alcohol since 8-11-90.

For that and you I am truely grateful.

Do you know what made you take that first
drink or drug? What caused you to drink
or take that first hit?

When i came into AA I had no idea
of what or who an alcoholic really
was. I figured i drank because i hated
my childhood life and those that pizzed
me off....

I thought for sure i had a high tolerence
for holding my liquor....that maybe being
Italian it was normal to consume large
amounts of alcohol in one day.

When i entered rehab after a family
intervention took place back in
Aug.90....i was handed the tools
and knowledge of what alcoholism
was all about...

I found out that I was an alcoholic
and that was all there was to it.

Like Popeye says...I yam what I yam
and that's what I yam.....

And Im Sharon and I yam an Alcoholic
with a disease that can stay at bay
as long as i take my recovery medicine
on a daily bases.....

And that is practicing the principles
of our recovery program set down before
us, and give away to another alcoholic
our own experiences, strengths and hopes
that they too may find serenity,peace
and happiness with out drinking or using.

Thanks for letting me share.

Jersey Nonny

No big mystery here. Because everyone else was doing it? Same reason I started smoking, became sexually active, got married, had children...wanted desperately to "fit in". It wasn't until after I got sober that I became "my own person"...boy, oh, boy...does it feel good.

Astro

My parents would give me sips of their beer when I was younger, and when they left the room I'd take another chug. I loved the taste of cold beer! When I got a job in the restaurant business at age 16 I became a daily drinker for the next 25 years.

Cindi R

Alcohol and drugs were my coping mechanism for many years...
actually I think that I survived my teen years due to their use.
Then I found a guy and we had our drug use in common so we bonded, got married, had a couple of kids..
My daddy was an alcoholic, and I learned it from him...although I didn't wanna be like him because he was a mean and nasty drunk...
so I turned to drugs instead.
I also got nasty hangovers...didn't like throwing up...didn't like the downer, depressing effects of alcohol...
Found speed and loved it...then came meth
The rest is history...self sufficient, 10 feet tall and bullet proof, had the world by the tail...
until I got tired, sick and tired of the life...
Got busted at work, went to treatment. Hubby didn't, I divorced him after 25 years.
Have been clean from meth for over 6 years.
Although for awhile I thought I might want to drink, I tried it and I still don't like to be around drunks...
although, I guess that I could maybe go out with someone who drinks once in a great while, compared to in the beginning...I thought that I needed to have someone in recovery...
Right now I'm dealing with the whole "codie" issues...
I've ordered some of those books finally, "codependent no more" and "women who love too much" because I can see myself still unhappy and longing for relationships that are not healthy, instead of just dumping the loser and moving on to find someone healthy...
I still somehow want to see the potential, and put up with crap that I know better than I ought to...thinking "one day he'll change".
I guess, I haven't decided what I'll do with the rest of my life just yet...
I'm a work in progress...

sunkensky

Took my first drink out of curiosity. Stole a bottle of Schnapps from someone else in the house and was on my way to pour it out to punish them, knowing they'd not really know the difference since they were passed out. Wondered what the big deal was. Took a few chugs. Felt great. Stole alcohol probably weekly after that, or as often as it was available, and I could do it without being caught.

Missymae737

Good topic, Sharon...

I took my first drink when I was seventeen...Mostly it was to show THEM, my parents that I wouldn't end up like them...JUST a little anger, that was me...


Boy, my mind was warped...lol

rloomer

Took my first drink when I was 14 and hated the tatse. I never wanted to touch it again. But it did something I was never able to do. It made me not hate myself.

aasharon90

I went to my first New Years Slumber party at 16 17....There
was alcohol there...beer in a tub of ice....everyone was drinking
just for fun...no big deal....however since i came from an inviroment
were alcohol was available and physical abuse was on me.......i
swore i would never become like my mom....so alcohol was something
i approached with caution....RIGHT....i said sarcastically.....

Sure i was careful not to guzzle it , but something happened
to me where i had that craving for it...i must have been feeling
good, loose or something....and kept drinking it till i had my
first hangover.....I remember feeling lousy when i got home
for New Years Day....YUCK.

The reward for that little stunt was...i got my first boyfriend. YEEHA...

For the next 10 plus yrs i drank, got drunk, and still swore i wouldnt
be like my mom....

Today i look back and see where i am like her yet many ways im not....

The abuse pattern was broken as i swore i would never hurt my
kids like she did me....and i didnt with help from Above....

I did hit bottom and got sober thru intervention some 17 yrs ago.

I cant tell u her story because i stopped taking her inventory
yrs ago....

Today recovery is for me...no one else.

StandFast

Not sure, all that I remember is when I was 14/15 yo, we drank beer on the corner in the ciyt I grew up in. I also rem. going to a tavern and buying beers for a quarter. I loved that feeling and never ever stopped drinking on weekends. My whole life up to this past month I don't think since then that I was alcholol free to 2 weekedns in row.

I am afraid to go to aa and don't know why!

reed

drank 4 the first time at a wedding at age 14

29a

I was 12 at a party with my cousin and his friends who were all seniors in high school the first time i got drunk. basically i just wanted to fit in. it was fantastic, my "i had arrived" moment.
it was both the best and the worst thing to ever happen to me.

cookconfay

Yep....did it to "fit in"......funny how after 20+ years I became an outcast.......HA! Been clean & sober for over 10 yrs now....started with beer/wine & weed, ended up a heroin addict! Whew....narrowly escaped death SEVERAL times!

RK2007

When I was about 14/15, I used to smoke a lot of weed and do other drugs too, mainly psychedelic ones like LSD, mushrooms - I used to drink at weekends but it was never a problem...

Anyway doing all that stuff resulted in me having a few weird experiences and I was rendered unable to fall asleep because of it - this may sound stupid (it sure seems so now), but I wasn't sure where my consciousness was going when I fell asleep and I was terrified to fall asleep - I would start dosing off and then be filled with the most horrible feelings of fear because I didn't want to fall into a void of sleep...

I eventually told my brother what was happening, I was at my wits end and in tears after weeks of this, only grabbing a few hours sleep here and there from exhaustion...

He suggested I drink to fall asleep, so I did and the rest is history - ever since then, I gradually used it for more and more things, and always looked for an excuse to drink - any occasion became a drinking occasion, but it was ok - I was young and everybody else was doing it too...

Some people stopped doing it, I never - I'd still see them drinking lots at weekends but not during the week like me...

I even drank at home eventually...

So very glad that chapter of my life is over...

SF69

My parents too would give us sips of beer when I was a kid. Don't remember my first real drink/drunk, but it was probably when I was in 9th grade. I hung around a lot with the 'older' guys. They drank, so I started. Partially because of peer pressure, partially because I was curious.

kelsh

I remember my first drink/drunk...I was 20 years old and recently married. I worked all day on a Saturday and came home to a yummy pork roast dinner....and vodka/pineapple drinks....couldn't taste the alcohol so poured more vodka in....we had my husbands boys the next day for a few hours and they were pounding lids into pans....my head went bong & bong....I kept it up....the drinking gradually becoming an alcoholic and finally quit when I was 48 years old....in 1988.

kelsh

Aysha

The first time I drank or took drugs was pure curiosity. Didnt like alcohol or cocaine or crack or even cigarettes the first time. So the real question for me is...What made me take them the second time? Second time was the one that got me.
I dont even know to be honest with you. But sure do wish I wasnt one of the ones that has to get burned more than once to know the fire is hot.

Pinkcuda

I don't know! Why not, everyone else was.
Had I known that it would become my Master would I have done anything different?
Probably not. Sometimes you can take heed of the warnings and other times you just have to take a whiz on the electric fence and find out the hard way.

Goodnfast

That's the funny thing...the first 4-5 times I drank, even like only two beers, I got sick as a dog. I guess I kept trying because my friends were all drinking.

Emimily

i think i drank because i knew i shouldn't-both parents alcoholics, both in recovery, knew a lot about addiction... somehow I wouldn't be affected by the disease. yeah, famous last words. well, i drank and i loved it. much like 29a, i "had arrived".

man, talk about the cunning-baffling-powerful part.

coming_clean

I did not wanted to be myself....