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TOPIC: What Is The Best Thing To Do Or Best Place To Go To Avoid Lonilness?



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TOPIC: What Is The Best Thing To Do Or Best Place To Go To Avoid Lonilness?

Old 09-10-2007, 03:02 PM
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Thumbs up TOPIC: What Is The Best Thing To Do Or Best Place To Go To Avoid Lonilness?

Hi Im Sharon and Im an alcoholic.

By the Grace of my HP and people like
you here in SR I havent had a drink of
alcohol since 8-11-90.

For that and you I am truely grateful.

What is the best thing to do or the
best place to go to avoid lonliness?

Any clues?

Today was my day off work so I
headed to a noon birthday meeting
not to far from where I live.

Birthday meetings allow us to hear
for ourselves how our program works.

Whether someone picks up a year chip
all the way to 20 something yr. chip...
we hear exactly how they managed
to stay sober for as long as they have
one day at a time.

It never fails how i hear something
i need to hear at each meeting....just
like today I heard loud and clear about
something that I could do on a daily
bases to avoid loneliness and stay sober.

What is it?

Help other alcoholics achieve soberiety
or ny helping another alcoholic achieve
sobriety by sharing my own experiences,
strengths and hopes with them....

And what better place for me to be,
is right here in SR or at an AA meeting.

That way Im always with another alcoholic
and thus never alone.

How about you?

Thanks for letting me share.
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Old 09-10-2007, 03:06 PM
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I love the way you think, Sharon. Whenever I feel the slightest bit lonely I immediately think of going to a meeting, and once I'm there I let my higher power lead me into service.
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Old 09-10-2007, 03:21 PM
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I come here, being that i am in deep depression..Truth is i long for love but i know that around in the world i tend to feel lonelier with people who don't care enough..So coming here is a good way..Sr makes me feel that i am not the only person who wishes people were more supportive in the real world..
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Old 09-10-2007, 03:38 PM
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Thanks Astro for sharing and ur kind words.


It could be easy to sit here with self, feeling sorta
lonely....I mean i have had a full early part of the day
with a doctors checkup at 8am...then a trip to the store,
return home and head to a noon meeting......and yet
in a split moment, my selfishness allowed me to feel alone.

Why is that i wonder....i do like myself....well most of the
time.. However it would be nice to have someone to
hold me ...hmmmm....i can give myself a bear hug....but
then its not the same....lol

oh well....i tried....

Im grateful to be sober today, grateful for my health, grateful
to have as many meetings i can go to whenever i want.

I am able to witness more miracles of recovery, hold hands
and give hugs with other members....find out about another
new meeting i can go to later in the week....retire early and
head to work tomorrow.

So what's lacking....hmmmm.....a stronger more fullfilling intimate
relationship with my HP. Whatcha think?
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Old 09-10-2007, 03:40 PM
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Well..I go to my aunt's or my cousin's house. Where there is always lots of kids and lots of family to keep me busy.
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Old 09-10-2007, 04:45 PM
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Thanks guys for sharing ur thoughts. Much appreciated.

Family is good, esp. if u are close to one. There's nothing like
the laughter and giggles of little ones....they so tug at our
heart strings dont they?

Children are so innocent at first before they are exposed
to life and all that it offers to them....

Anyway...getting off track here....

Any Kenny Chesney fans out there..?
No SHOES NO SHIRT NO PROBLEM....LOL
BLUES WHAT BLUES I FORGOT'EM.

I am content right now at the moment with
Kenny on the tube....Yeeha..!

Well back to the topic....

It never fails how much graditude i get when
i can share with others in recovery. If i can say
at least one thing that makes sense or makes a
difference in anothers life, then thats cool.

Several weeks ago when i picked up my 17 yr chip,
i stood and shared to a room filled with new comers....
and oldtimers....

Last time i went to that meeting which was a few days
ago...i was standing at the coffee pot,when someone asked
me if i sponsor anyone....I told her i feel like a sponsor
to all who listen to me...so theres no one person in
particular I sponsor...but....And i told her i didnt speak
much in meetings but i listen and sharde online and
one on one.

One lady nearby heard me and she commentd
that when i do say something its profound
and important....that made me feel good to
hear that because i only shared my ESH
that day i picked up my chip and cant remember
all that i shared....

So what ever i did share must have sounded ok. WHEW..!

Anyway....what and awesome feeling it is to be a part
of a wonderful sucessful recovery program if u work
it...one day at a time....thats it....

Make a difference in someones life....a difference
in ur own life.

Thanks for letting me share.
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Old 09-11-2007, 12:56 AM
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JrgIBc2iJrA

I listen to this sharon..lol

cuz i'm a thousand miles from nowhere..lol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5HvC-zsocAc

maybe i'll join a circus
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GGZlhtiXETg
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Old 09-11-2007, 01:12 AM
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For me, meetings are such a blessing and so I actually enjoy the time I can spend on my own! But if lonely, definitely hook up with a meeting and it always works. Not immediately sometimes I'm so caught up inside myself that I fail to see and notice all the beauty around me in and outside of a meeting. Also remembering to be grateful, gratitude list always helps. And baths! And sometimes just good old sleep!

Cathy31
x
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Old 09-11-2007, 01:33 AM
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just going through something wierd.
It's not that I havn't gone through a break up or seperation from
my GF before.

maybe it's healthy for me..that's why it feels wierd...I don't know.
Honestly, i don't feel lonely today...which is a bit odd,
becuase when my gf was using, i felt lonely as hell living with her.

I don't know..maybe i'm hurting so damn much that i don't feel
anything. Or maybe I'm just too tired to cried..lol

Or maybe god is holding me up becuase i don't really beliving in god
at the moment.

or maybe I've just totally lost my marbles..lol
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Old 09-11-2007, 01:43 AM
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Satit...DWIGHT YOAKAM....BABY..! BABY ..! BABY..! lol

LOVE IT..! Love him.... OH BABY..! lol

Need I say more...??

You won my heart today....lol Satit..WHEW..!
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Old 09-11-2007, 01:50 AM
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So the best thing to do besides make a meeting or
talk with another in recovery is do exactly like Satit
does....oh and me too....lol Go Listen To Music....

You would not believe how much music plays a
big part of my recovery,,,,

I could be in any kind of mood and when i listen to
music....it completely takes me out of whatever funk
im in and brightens my spirit....

It sets the mood for whatever state of mind im in at
the moment....

I LOVE MUSIC....PERIOD..

Just last night i had Kenny Chesney on TV watching
one of his concerts.....AWESOME....

I just CRANKED that sucker up and got down with him...lol
So to speak.......
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Old 09-11-2007, 02:06 AM
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oki doki ..that song starts @ 6:15 mark lousiana rain
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OtFWQ3Mbpjg

after the thrill is gone
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xkDmz0vRm9E
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Old 09-11-2007, 02:16 AM
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Ok satit...now that ive heard Dwights Yoakams music this morning,
i will carry it with me all day long.....

Now Im A THOUSAND MILES FROM NOWHERE'S...LOL

....you now have to come see me in Baton Rouge....lol
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Old 09-11-2007, 02:18 AM
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Brits gotta go tho.... YUCK..! lol

Im not that lonely yet...lol
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Old 09-11-2007, 02:51 AM
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oki doki..a little bit of insomity..lol
the night owl
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mFLdHx2ZXUA

take it easy on me
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bm8DCQLiV44
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Old 09-11-2007, 12:09 PM
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As I look back on my shares this morning....hmmm....
looks like i was goofing off pretty good.... lol I guess
its ok to have fun in recovery,,,,its ok to laugh and
have a good time.....they would want us to, right?

As we learn to stay sober each day by facing different
situations that baffle us, we still can learn to have
some humor.

Did you know that it takes more muscles to frown....
so smiling isnt as hard as u think it is....

Anyway....back to lonilness....no one likes to feel
lonely, right? I mean is...i know we need to learn to
be by ourselves. Learn that its ok to be with oneself.

To be comfortable in our own skins.

Quiet time to reflect, to regroup our thoughts.

And then there are times we isolate to much
and think too much....That could be dangerous....

Once you recieve the tools of recovery then u
can use them to help you get out of situations
that baffle us....meaning ....if that stinkinging
thinking pops up then u can head to a meeting
or pick up the phone or go find another alcoholic
or addict to help.....

Right? Soooooo....

We never have to be alone or lonely in recovery. Right?
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Old 09-11-2007, 12:17 PM
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ok satit...i heard abracadabra by Steve Miller Band....lol

CRANK IT UP...
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Old 09-11-2007, 01:00 PM
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Interesting question....in my case, being alone, and loneliness were not the same. I've been to group functions, (mostly before recovery), surrounded by people, and felt lonely as hell.

In recovery I've gone thru periods of isolation; meaning, I go to meetings, and thats it. No other contact with meeting people. So I was alone. Sometimes I was fine with it, sometimes I felt lonely.

The way I'm learning, to alleviate the loneliness, is by making a connection with somebody, somehow. Though the internet by itself does not do it for me. It helps while I'm online, but fades away as soon as the computer shuts down. Actually personal connections can be felt much longer, in my experience, can last the whole day.

For some, myself included, it can be a very big wall to climb.
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Old 09-11-2007, 02:29 PM
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It is true what Doug shared about the computer....
Even tho i enjoy coming here to SR to share and
communicating thru shares and replies...cyber
relationships suck big time..... meaning....

I cant see you nor touch nor hear you....unless
i travel forever...in which i would be scared as
hell to venture long distance on my own....and
plus i have NO sense of direction what so ever...lol

I cant touch u because u live forever away....and
I cant hear u unless its long distance phone calling
in which it cost money unless u want to use ur free
minutes...lol

So while it satifies u and me for the time we are
online...it fades when the computer is turned off....right?

Then Im left with me myself and I or you, urself and ...lol
well....urself....

Unless....u surround urself with either recovery folks or
family or pets...

I go to meetings and sit amongst members then
leave...i havent found it comfortable to hang
very long around others....maybe because i
think im boring or dont have much to say....

All the knowledge i know is about raising kids,
homemaking, my job and recovery....

Oh and some sports....Golf...just cause i
like watching it....

Oh i forgot...music....just because i
like to listen to it....

Oh...and....well....shopping....and self
and ....Well wouldnt u admitt what ur
good at too?

All physical behaviors...

WHAT....lol i got off the topic...shoots....

Reel me back in.....lol

So what do we do to alliviate loniliness
besides sharing ur experiences strengths
and hopes with others?
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Old 09-11-2007, 08:08 PM
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My phones been ringing off the hook. Every single call is from a fellow AA. It's nice to think about someone but me !

But yeah, I was an isolationist when I joined up. THe fellowship is one of the MANY un-expected blessings...
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