sober sex?
simplysober
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 118
sober sex?
Im sorry if this post is too blunt, but i need to ask others opinions on this subject
I dont think ive ever had sober sex. I have a wonderful boyfriend, and Im kinda scared- ive never been with him sober. aside from my very first boyfriend in highschool 25 yrs ago, i dont think ive ever had sober sex.
Am i the only one who is scared about this new way of being with someone?
my apologies if this was over the top
maria
I dont think ive ever had sober sex. I have a wonderful boyfriend, and Im kinda scared- ive never been with him sober. aside from my very first boyfriend in highschool 25 yrs ago, i dont think ive ever had sober sex.
Am i the only one who is scared about this new way of being with someone?
my apologies if this was over the top
maria
want 2 stop!
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: uk ,
Posts: 35
i know what u mean, my 1st sexual experienc was after a botle a vodka while i was unconcious at 13, guess raped by an 18yr old, i had no recolection, so sex has always been a drunken thing,
i been with my bf 3 yrs, not really had sober sex, tipsy but always feel more uninhibited, when im really drunk it s wild, but thinking about it, half the time it s prob not as wild as it was in our heads! well fallin about an having quick swigg a beer in middle of it s prob not that great!! but bf is always drunk 2, an i often have 2 pretend i rem our wild nite, !! bit s an pieces come bk, but never rem all, so i gues it s better 2 be confident in yourself an if u been wiv bf a while u know each other, just dont think to much about it, 2 much , an it ll b fine, prob be better sober , (i ve even fallen asleep i was so drunk 1 time , bf not amused!!! sorry if thats to frank,
i been with my bf 3 yrs, not really had sober sex, tipsy but always feel more uninhibited, when im really drunk it s wild, but thinking about it, half the time it s prob not as wild as it was in our heads! well fallin about an having quick swigg a beer in middle of it s prob not that great!! but bf is always drunk 2, an i often have 2 pretend i rem our wild nite, !! bit s an pieces come bk, but never rem all, so i gues it s better 2 be confident in yourself an if u been wiv bf a while u know each other, just dont think to much about it, 2 much , an it ll b fine, prob be better sober , (i ve even fallen asleep i was so drunk 1 time , bf not amused!!! sorry if thats to frank,
Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Alive
Posts: 168
Sooooo much better sober! At least that's my experience. You are in for a real "treat" for lack of a better word. Like Pilgrim said, "The answers will come in their own good time." But really, don't sweat it...
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Just to prepare you sober sex is far better then drunk sex, one of the few times I was sober and had sex years ago was with a gal that was drunk on her arse, having sex with a drunk when one is sober in my experience is not very romantic at all... as a matter of fact it was pretty darn disgusting looking back on it.
If I was going to have sex outside of my marriage now it would not be with a woman who was drunk!
If I was going to have sex outside of my marriage now it would not be with a woman who was drunk!
want 2 stop!
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: uk ,
Posts: 35
dosent paint a real romantic pic doe s it !!! i just been thinkin a the times i do remember an god if bf was sober , i dont think he d b my bf,an vice versa
sooooooooo,, got to get my bf to quit or at least limit drink to weekends,
the 9 days i stayed sober we fell out an i slept on the sofa,the whole time cos oh my god dont drunk people droan on an on an repeat an talk, cxxp!!!! so sex was not on agenda,
but thanks 4 that taz, that can b on my to do list SOBER SEX
WEED THE GARDEN
MOW THE LAWN,
GO BK TO COLLEGE
not sure which will come 1st!!!!
sooooooooo,, got to get my bf to quit or at least limit drink to weekends,
the 9 days i stayed sober we fell out an i slept on the sofa,the whole time cos oh my god dont drunk people droan on an on an repeat an talk, cxxp!!!! so sex was not on agenda,
but thanks 4 that taz, that can b on my to do list SOBER SEX
WEED THE GARDEN
MOW THE LAWN,
GO BK TO COLLEGE
not sure which will come 1st!!!!
Another Day in Paradise
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Upland, CA
Posts: 900
You can remember names! In all seriousness, the experience requires that the "real" you be present and it has been amazing to me that just like the rest of life sober you find that you have more to offer than 1/2 of yourself.
Once we begin to know who we are and we come to like that person I think we are amazed that others like us too. It makes it an encounter that allows reality to sink in. Enjoy each day and all it has to offer; sex is but a part of this new world.
Keep your hands and arms "inside" at all times and enjoy the ride!!
Jon
Once we begin to know who we are and we come to like that person I think we are amazed that others like us too. It makes it an encounter that allows reality to sink in. Enjoy each day and all it has to offer; sex is but a part of this new world.
Keep your hands and arms "inside" at all times and enjoy the ride!!
Jon
JUST DO IT!!
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Here Or There
Posts: 7,612
I have had it in the past, however I have gotten away from it for awhile now because it is also a part of my disease of addiction. One is too many and a thousand is never enough. Heck I think I might take this topic over to my site. LOL
Now I have not had it this time yet in my clean time except with myself
Now I have not had it this time yet in my clean time except with myself
No more merlot, more mamma
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Hills, Ct
Posts: 2,139
When I first sobered up, my gf and I were worried bout this very thing. I was never sober when we were intimate in the past. I was always buzzed/drunk/hungover.
Now? A beautiful blessing.
Now? A beautiful blessing.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Central California
Posts: 246
Wish I Knew
Hi Simlysober, I really can't answer this cause I wasn't getting any when I was drinking and I'm still not getting any now that I'm sober! 
Glad to be sober though! I would think the sex would be better because all your senses are clear when you're not drinking.
Glad to be sober though! I would think the sex would be better because all your senses are clear when you're not drinking.
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
but thanks 4 that taz, that can b on my to do list SOBER SEX
Forum Leader
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Scottsdale, AZ, one big happy dysfunctional family!
Posts: 23,056
After 27 years of dysfunctional, alcoholic relationships with addicts all I can say is.....
It was worth the wait, there's nothing more emotional than making love sober. It's definitely a gift.
But it's OK to wait too.
It was worth the wait, there's nothing more emotional than making love sober. It's definitely a gift.
But it's OK to wait too.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: on to bigger & better things
Posts: 4,122
I have learned from my experience that while yes it really is tons better, there are a lot more things to be thought of....motives. Must really be aware of what's going on now since clean & sober...no more USING people or not even being there mentally or emotionally. Wow what a difference. You know....start keeping my side of the street clean. Can no longer just hop in the sack for the "fun" of it. Thinking less of myself and more of others. For me...there MUST be emotional attachment and a whole bunch more before I'm gonna get the shame and remorse and guilt of the day after a one night stand again!!!!!
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Connie that is so very true, there is such a huge difference between making love and sex, drunks (I was one) have sex, sober people make love, which carries no guilt or remorse.
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