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Old 08-27-2007, 02:07 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Hi, I'm New.


Hi everyone, I'm new here and just wanted to say a few things about me.. Maybe I'll meet some people here that share what I'm going through, because to be quite honest.. I need help & support.

My name's Marie, and I'm suffering from Bi-Polar Disorder. On top of that I'm struggling with addiction problems. I'm only 17 years old, soon to be 18.
I would say others view me as a nice, sweet, outgoing person. That's how I am outside of my home, when I'm around others. Although I've always felt isolated and distant from everyone.
When I'm alone I morph into a self-loathing, irritated, highly irrational person.
I try anything and everything to feel some sort of buzz, or intoxification.
I've even stooped down to gulping listerine, and emptying bottles of Robitussin.
You name it, I've probably tried it. Shroom's, Acid, Marijuana, Alcohol, Pharmicudicals, Etc.
I'm temporarily thrown into a world above everyone else, and it make's me happy.
But in truth, it's messing up my life.
I currently see a both a psychologist & psychiatrist.. but I can't get these impulses to go away.

I just want to talk to people who feel what I do, so please.. I'm asking for any help.
Thanks, nice being here.
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Old 08-27-2007, 02:14 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Hi Sweetem,

Welcome to SR...We are gald you found us...You are not alone with your feelings...

Others will be along with great info and support...

Keep posting...
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Old 08-27-2007, 02:18 PM   #3 (permalink)
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nice to meet you. glad you are getting support from counselors and doctors. is your family supporting you in your recovery efforts? keep posting and hugs, k
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Old 08-27-2007, 02:25 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Absolutely, I tell my parents everything and I think of them as my number one supporters.

Thanks for replying
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Old 08-27-2007, 02:31 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Hi sweet..Glad you are here...I was just told by a therapist I have bipolar too. I never would have thought. But I guess that explains why I am all good one minute and then a raging maniac at the drop of a hat.
I think it is so great you have an open line of communication with your parents. I too have one with my grams. It definately makes a difference I think.
This board is a great one and hope to see more of you.
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Old 08-27-2007, 02:50 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Hi and Welcome,

I'm so glad you found us and please know that you are not alone. There is lots of support here. I can sure relate to the self-loathing that you talk about. I don't think I could have harmed my body the way I did with alcohol, if I hadn't hated myself.

If you're interested you might also like to check out these teen links:

http://www.12stepforums.net/teens.html
http://www.activeboard.com/forum.spark?forumID=42762
http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom4.html
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Old 08-27-2007, 04:32 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Hi SweetEm,

I'm so glad you're here - welcome!

I understand putting on one face to the world, and being someone completely different at home. I absolutely hated myself and couldn't stand pretending.

There is hope. It sounds as though you have a wonderful support team in place

Keep posting - thanks for joining our recovery family.

Rowan
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Old 08-28-2007, 11:05 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Thanks so much everybody, Hope you all have a wonderful day
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Old 08-28-2007, 11:10 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Thanks, Em. You too!!
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Old 08-28-2007, 10:21 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Hi Sweet

We all have to come to terms with our addiction. One way is to add up all the negative things (impulsiveness, etc.) it gives us and then all the positive things we think it is giving us (happiness, etc.). Then find healthy ways to achieve the positive. Then it will be much easier to beat the addiction, because then all you will have is negative things that will disappear when you stop using.

HTH
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Old 08-29-2007, 04:08 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Welcome to SR Sweet glad you found us and hope that you'll keep us updated, we're here for you.
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Old 08-29-2007, 04:28 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Hi and welcome Em!
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As from a fire aflame thousands of sparks come forth,
even so from the Creator an infinity of beings have life and to him return again.
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Old 08-29-2007, 04:43 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Hi Sweet Em and welcome here. You will find many people and support here so keep us "posted",

Jhana
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