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LOL I love the Kinks!! They're amazing!!

Why does alcohol progress as it does? Why is it that as I continue drinking, even if I take a long break, it just gets worse when I start again???

Dee74

I'm sure someone here can provide the scientific explanation and technical jargon, b2b...

all I know is it does...
stop and you'll start off again exactly where you were, if you're *lucky*...
usually for some reason I found I was way way worse

D

xXBacktoBlackXx

Same here...I just cringe when I think of Monday night. I feel like when everyone sees me all they see is an alcoholic. I feel that way about myself, too. I feel as if I'm falling down this horrible spiral.

I don't know if it's the same for other people, but once I get started with destructive behavior like drinking or drugs, I start to get destructive with my personal life..even when I'm not on the drinking or drugs. For whatever reason, it's like that lifestyle means I need to have all these...unsavory people in my life. Now I'm back in.

Rowan

Now you're back in? Is that what you said?

I thought you wanted to get well. Are you going to give up on yourself so easily?

Dee74

me too - I had a lot of people in my life that, now, I would cross the street to avoid.
It's the old journey of a lifetime starts with a single step thing, b2b...

It's not easy but start digging out *now* - get help, fight this, and everything else will fall back into place. Trust me.

D

mysoulswornthin

B2B,

21 and obviously insightfull and intelligent. You have such a head start! Don't worry about what anyone else thinks and don't beat yourself up over what you did while drinking - that path leads nowhere. Start fresh.

Don't ever give up on you.

Aysha

B2B..Glad to see you back. I just got back myself.
Funny where we go for comfort and understanding.
Gotta be a reason for that.
I think alot of people here just may know what they are talking about.
I know I kept fighting the whole treatment..meeting thing.
But I am giving it a try. It really is all I have left.
You made the steps before..Dont just give up after 1 or 2 falls.
Thats what I did and totally lost it the past few months.
Just keep trying and never ever give up.
Recovery is the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. But I know it is the best thing as well.
You can do it!! Thinking of you!!

xXBacktoBlackXx

Thanks for all the posts. I'm just taking this day by day. Not only am I going to cut alcohol out of my life, but toxic people as well. I've noticed that sometimes people can be like an addiction, especially the bad ones. All of it is a withdrawal process for me.

parentrecovers

b2b - you can recover. blessings, k

stone

I know I fought it too, for as long as I could.
Its great to hear you say those words Chi!


Hi B2B, how are you today?

xXBacktoBlackXx

Hi everyone. It's inspiring to see so many people come together on this site.
I'm sorry, I'm just afraid I can't do this anymore. I don't know what's wrong with me, I just feel so depressed today and I want a drink.

stone

Hi B2B, I know its tough, very bleak moods are what used to get me drinking when I was trying not to.
Its true what they say you know, it just makes it worse. Being an alkie is all about knowing it makes it worse and doing it anyway. You know sticking your hand in a fire will hurt so you dont do it but that common sense goes when it comes to drinking.

If you can, just try not to drink today.

Dee74

I was going to send you a PM but what the hell.
what is it you can't do anymore ? You haven't done anything yet !

I love ya...but geez...DO SOMETHING. STOP putting some kind of action off.

D

Aysha

Sounds like me for the past few months.
Seems alot easier to just keep going with what you know,
But I dont even think I klnow what that is anymore either.
I know my life has completely been $hit lately and only because I didnt care or wanted to change really.
Too hard to get it together. Too many let downs and disappointments.
Well I found I need to quit being lazy especially when it comes to my life.
I have no choice but to suck it up and get it together.
I dont want to die like this. I dont want to die!
I dont want to suffer anymore either.
I am my own worse enemy and only I can make these changes I need to stop all the misery.
It is all in your hands.
Now you need to decide whether you want to keep torturing yourself or not.
I hope you decide not to drink if only for today.
I am thinking of you.

Dee74

((((((((((Chiy))))))))))))

D

Hevyn

B2B, by dealing with this now you are saving yourself decades of misery, ruined health and an early death. Oh to go back 30+ years and undo all the damage, destruction and heartache I caused by insisting I could be a social drinker. All the wasted time! Be so glad you're finding out now what alcohol/drugs do to you. It never crossed my mind that I was destroying myself - I was having fun and loving life, until it all went to hell. Also, you are so right about "picking up where you left off" damage wise - I was once sober for 3 yrs. and when I started again it only took a few binges to bring me to me knees, emotionally, financially, physically. Do not become defeated by your setback, DRIVE ON......

person197

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its too late now i am drunk. its okay i ll get through this

nogard

never to late B2B simply put down the drink and get back on track. How about looking at what went wrong and what you can do to stop going back there again.

Kevin

Dee74

when you're ready, I'll be here. We all will.
I hate being tough guy - it ******* sucks.
but I love my friends.

D