carl11

well day 26....had a rocky last 2 days...the dogs were barking so to speak....was at home, as I get off at 330 pm...wife and son don’t come home till 600pm...home alone.....hummmm, work for idle hands an all that.....said the serenity prayer abnut 20 times..got in my car and hit the highway, 30 minutes down the road 30 back..helped take the edge off, plus getting stuck in traffic..my mood was not enhanced..but life happens...made it home then went to a meeting....being an alcoholic aint like being in prison were you chalk up days and wait for your release date..there is NO release date..its forever....

Getting my head into that is hard, especially when you feel good again and think; “ hey, I have almost a month, see, I can do this, just once a month, I can drink tonight, and start my sobriety again tomorrow, if I can just drink once a month that will do it for me”...Bull*hit....thats the beguiling, cunning john barleycorn talking...and he’ll tell you in 2 weeks;” hey, you have 2 weeks, lets celebrate, you can do a clean 2 weeks and come back to your sobriety” then it’s a week, then..well you know.......nope....that’s a road back to hell....don’t get on that road....
anyway, am hanging in there....

Rowan

Carl,

You were wise to get out of the house when you realized you were on dangerous ground. I find it helpful to get out - walk to the store, buy myself something chocolate as a treat. The physical exertion (and the sugar!) helps me with cravings.
And yes, as much as we say 'a day at a time' - we know it's more than that. Do your best to stay in today, and worry about tomorrow when it arrives.
I'm glad you are seeing denial for what it is, and not giving in to temptation.
Well done on 26 days! Keep on racking them up!

Rowan

GlassPrisoner

4 more days !!!!

That said, all you have is today. Concentrate on that.

And yeah, that was good action on your part.

carl11

thanx...at home now waiting for the cable guy....he'll be here "between 800 and noon" yea right, we have all heard that before...if that deosn't drive me to drink nothing will..lol....

parentrecovers

great job on the sober time, carl. sorry about the cable guy

support out, k

carl11

thank you!
hey, its life right(?) and life goes on...

Aysha

Good job on 26 days...I know all too well what that little voice tells you after feeling normal and thinking one or two isnt going to hurt.
Story of my life. Thats the voice that always takes me further and further.
But good job and keep it up. Just for today...And yes...stay as busy as possible...Boredom is a killer for me.
If I had my puter I would have a nice graphic for you..But I am not...so Congrats !!!

Anna

Carl, you're doing great in recognizing the addict voice for what it is. That's a big step. And leaving your house and doing something different is a good idea too. What worked for me, early on, was changing my routines and pattersns. And, being home alone was a huge trigger for me.

Good luck with the cable guy!

Astro

An old friend used to remind me that the universe continues to move, I have the option of moving along with it or sitting in my @#$%. And as the days go by, one at a time, life happens in sobriety, but is starts to happen peacefully and beautifully.
It takes time carl, and sometimes we take some backward steps, but we never need to drink again.

Glad to hear you abstained and had the awareness of where that drink would lead you, and that you took action.

carl11

thank you and good luck today..I'll keep you in mind, when I say hello to my HP today...I figure if the cable guy isn't here by 100o, I'll be doing a few serenity prayers.......lol......if your ears ring today, thats me.....

L Ron Hoover

Congrats on your sober time, Carl!

Every day without a drink is a good day. Good luck with the cable. At least he gave you only a 4-hour window. I'm happy if someone shows up on the day he said.

Blessing to you.

LRH

carl11

yes home alone time can be dicey.....I am into a book and cannot wait to huncker down and let the story take me away....I will not drink today..tomorrow..I'll cross that bridge when I come to it...

carl11

dude you're killing me...hahahaha I need my tivo back!!!

carl11

thank you..its easy to get mad at events that continue to happen around you ....one might want to say; "hey I am sober and am moving on, give me a break"....unfortunately it doesn’t happen that way....its in how you deal with it..I hear you....I try not to get hung up on that....things aren’t owed to anyone...but- we owe sobriety to ourselves...( full disclosure: I stole that line from a guy who spoke at my meeting last night)...

it occurs to me that I have not expressed the deep gratitude I feel being here and to you all for your words and prayers...coming here, your help, means a great deal to me...When I found this place I was at rock bottom...it HAS helped....and I thank you all for it...if I could get the darn smilies to work I'd give you all a hug....

Astro

Cool. Take what you need and leave the rest;-)

Life doesn't necessarily get easier in sobriety. But it seems like I take on more challenges and have the tools to get through them without drinking.

carl11

amennnn to that.....

Cekiya

Hi Carl,

I am 21 days behind you, so I applaud you!! Wow, that is three weeks down the road. Tonight, that looks like a VERY long time.

But--I reckon if you can do it; I can too!

So, thanks for showing me that it can be done.

Have a peaceful, sober evening,
Cekiya

I am looking forward to a haze-free Saturday morning; now THAT will be something new.

CarolD

Well done on thinking the drink thru Carl!


It's the first drink that has the last say.
(from todays reading in our 12 Step Forum)

Blessings to you and your family

Rowan

Hey Carl,

Did the cable guy show up? I still haven't seen that movie in it's entirety, but not long ago I caught a bit of it on TV - Jim Carrey was playing a game with Matthew Broderick and his family called Porno Password. Have you seen it? Poor Matthew was teamed up with his mother and had to give one-word clues for her to guess. I remember Jim Carrey leaning in to Matthew, and whispering in his ear, with that raspy lisp, 'The porno password issss ..... nipple!' LMAO
Hope you had a good day

carl11

hey stay busy....it can be a long time if you are alone or counting the minutes..clean a closet, make some involved meal..thats what I do on Saturday and sundays...something with a lot of prep work (that does not require cooking wine or anything like that of course...lol).....you can do it, at the 5 day mark I was envious of those that had 25 days as well! well its here and there it is....no booze..hang tough and yes, do remember getting up with a clear head is a great way to start the day.....amen and be well!