What should I expect or what is expected of me?
Looking For Myself...Sober
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Where the heart is
Posts: 10,209
What should I expect or what is expected of me?
Ok..I'm gonna do it. I'm going tonight at 6pm. NA first time ever.
What the hell do I do?
I am soooooo freakin nervous.
I dont know why.
So what do I do being a first timer...newcomer?
What is expected of me?
I dont know how this works!!! UUGGHH!!!
What the hell do I do?
I am soooooo freakin nervous.
I dont know why.
So what do I do being a first timer...newcomer?
What is expected of me?
I dont know how this works!!! UUGGHH!!!
Don't get undies in a bunch
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: South Shore MA
Posts: 7,120
You show up and listen. Nothing more is required.
What can you expect?
You will find a room of people who understand your every feeling and you will find your not alone on this journey.
What can you expect?
You will find a room of people who understand your every feeling and you will find your not alone on this journey.
No more merlot, more mamma
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Hills, Ct
Posts: 2,139
I'm glad that you are going tonight too. Like everyone else said, just walk in, sit down, and listen. If you want to, you can say that you are new. Please let us know how it went when you get back!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: CA Native
Posts: 2,509
YAY! You just made my day 
Good for you.
Here's my quick guide:
1) Be on time, take a seat, preferably near the front of the room where the secretary is. Feel free to get up and grab coffee, snacks (if there), at anytime. If you smoke, you can go out (quietly) for a smoke break whenever (some meetings still allow smoking, not sure in your area).
2) If I were you, I would find a meeting with a Speaker, I usually find those the best, especially early on. DON'T BE embarrassed. EVERYONE THERE was in your EXACT SHOES when they started out, and you'll never find a nicer more understanding group of people. I promise you.
3) When they ask if anyone's attending their first ever NA meeting (or in first 30 days sobriety) raise your hand proudly, state your first name, followed by the words "and I'm an addict, this is my first meeting ever". Enjoy your big round of applause and enthusiastic shout or two of "Welcome...<your name>"
4) Remember that to AA/NA, the newcomer is the most important person in the room, because we can only keep what we have by giving it away. Nobody will look down on you in any way shape or form, so please don't spend your time worrying about anything like that. We all NEED newcomers to remind us of the reality of our situation.
5) If, during the group sharing there is silence, and you feel like talking, simply repeat "your name ... addict" and then start talking. Usually 3-5 minutes is the expected timeframe, but people often ignore that if they need to, and nobody will cut you off no matter how long you ramble on. Newcomers are given WIDE berth and understanding, ESP. if they say they're at their first ever meeting!
6) LISTEN, but don't THINK too much. Listen for similarities in people's stories to yours. Especially when it comes to feelings, how they felt. DON'T try to find the differences in their situations, because that is the addictive mind saying to you "See, you aren't LIKE these people, you're not as bad off as they were..." But your rational mind should be thinking that only some people are going to tell you bad off they really were, there may be others there who stopped using at a similar point to you, in fact, there ARE, I promise you that. In other words, maybe some people had much lower bottoms than you. You should be saying to yourself "There, but for the Grace of this program, GO I". And you better believe it honey. When your addictive mind starts talking, you should be adding "Yeah ... that just hasn't happened to me ... YET!!!" to everything it says to you.
6) Join the circle in the end of the meeting, doesn't matter if you know the prayer, just join in and stand there with your head down with everyone else. Then, stick around after the meeting, many will want to welcome you, talk to you. Ask the secretary if you can buy a Big Book (they're like 5 bucks), and then READ THE WHOLE THING during the times when you feel sorry for yourself, like using/drinking, etc.
7) DON'T get hung up on the Higher Power thing. It truly can be whatever you want, and most people don't really 'get' the spiritual part at first anyway. You really (usually) have to be sober for awhile to get it is the truth. It's really just part of your set of 'tools' for keeping sober, it doesn't mean you're gonna have to start going to Church on Sunday if you want to be in the program, NOT AT ALL so don't let it put you off. Just ignore it for now if you like.
8) Its also nice if you can put a buck in the basket, but not required in any way.
9) KEEP COMING BACK, and try to come back clean. The program WORKS if you work it.
I'm really excited for you, make sure you let us know how it went, kay?
Good for you.
Here's my quick guide:
1) Be on time, take a seat, preferably near the front of the room where the secretary is. Feel free to get up and grab coffee, snacks (if there), at anytime. If you smoke, you can go out (quietly) for a smoke break whenever (some meetings still allow smoking, not sure in your area).
2) If I were you, I would find a meeting with a Speaker, I usually find those the best, especially early on. DON'T BE embarrassed. EVERYONE THERE was in your EXACT SHOES when they started out, and you'll never find a nicer more understanding group of people. I promise you.
3) When they ask if anyone's attending their first ever NA meeting (or in first 30 days sobriety) raise your hand proudly, state your first name, followed by the words "and I'm an addict, this is my first meeting ever". Enjoy your big round of applause and enthusiastic shout or two of "Welcome...<your name>"
4) Remember that to AA/NA, the newcomer is the most important person in the room, because we can only keep what we have by giving it away. Nobody will look down on you in any way shape or form, so please don't spend your time worrying about anything like that. We all NEED newcomers to remind us of the reality of our situation.
5) If, during the group sharing there is silence, and you feel like talking, simply repeat "your name ... addict" and then start talking. Usually 3-5 minutes is the expected timeframe, but people often ignore that if they need to, and nobody will cut you off no matter how long you ramble on. Newcomers are given WIDE berth and understanding, ESP. if they say they're at their first ever meeting!
6) LISTEN, but don't THINK too much. Listen for similarities in people's stories to yours. Especially when it comes to feelings, how they felt. DON'T try to find the differences in their situations, because that is the addictive mind saying to you "See, you aren't LIKE these people, you're not as bad off as they were..." But your rational mind should be thinking that only some people are going to tell you bad off they really were, there may be others there who stopped using at a similar point to you, in fact, there ARE, I promise you that. In other words, maybe some people had much lower bottoms than you. You should be saying to yourself "There, but for the Grace of this program, GO I". And you better believe it honey. When your addictive mind starts talking, you should be adding "Yeah ... that just hasn't happened to me ... YET!!!" to everything it says to you.
6) Join the circle in the end of the meeting, doesn't matter if you know the prayer, just join in and stand there with your head down with everyone else. Then, stick around after the meeting, many will want to welcome you, talk to you. Ask the secretary if you can buy a Big Book (they're like 5 bucks), and then READ THE WHOLE THING during the times when you feel sorry for yourself, like using/drinking, etc.
7) DON'T get hung up on the Higher Power thing. It truly can be whatever you want, and most people don't really 'get' the spiritual part at first anyway. You really (usually) have to be sober for awhile to get it is the truth. It's really just part of your set of 'tools' for keeping sober, it doesn't mean you're gonna have to start going to Church on Sunday if you want to be in the program, NOT AT ALL so don't let it put you off. Just ignore it for now if you like.
8) Its also nice if you can put a buck in the basket, but not required in any way.
9) KEEP COMING BACK, and try to come back clean. The program WORKS if you work it.
I'm really excited for you, make sure you let us know how it went, kay?
Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Upstate, N.Y.
Posts: 4,639
Chi, don't worry about being nervous. I'm nervous about going too and I've been to meetings in the past and had almost 2 years in 1992. My stomach hurts today about going back. But I'm going anyway. I'll know that I'll be welcomed back home.
Barb
Barb
Looking For Myself...Sober
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Where the heart is
Posts: 10,209
Good your not too far from me...Lets go together.. LOL..J/K
I am just nervous because I dont know what to expect and who to expect. I am having social anxiety and that never happens. I have a big mouth. I am hardly shy. So I am freaking that this is bothering me so much.
I'm sure I will be fine once I get in there. I hope it is all you guys say it will be.
Dam Dr is taking his time calling me back to fill my script for my xanax. I dont hardly take them things. But it seems like when I really need them I dont have any. I give them all away. I gave my last one away when I was on my 6 day binge to a couple girls who were really dope sick. It made them feel a little better. I hate to se them sick like that.
But now I need them. I'll be Ok once I get settled in there.
I am just nervous because I dont know what to expect and who to expect. I am having social anxiety and that never happens. I have a big mouth. I am hardly shy. So I am freaking that this is bothering me so much.
I'm sure I will be fine once I get in there. I hope it is all you guys say it will be.
Dam Dr is taking his time calling me back to fill my script for my xanax. I dont hardly take them things. But it seems like when I really need them I dont have any. I give them all away. I gave my last one away when I was on my 6 day binge to a couple girls who were really dope sick. It made them feel a little better. I hate to se them sick like that.
But now I need them. I'll be Ok once I get settled in there.
Looking For Myself...Sober
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Where the heart is
Posts: 10,209
Tick Tock..Tick Tock....OOOohhh Boy. I am really nervous now. I am about to call my freakin Dr and see what the hell is taking so long to call me back.
I am dressed and ready to go.
I am going. I am shaking. This is crazy.
I dont know why I am working myself up like this.
I just slammed my foot into my chair....Man my toes are killing me now.
See how nervous I am.
I am dressed and ready to go.
I am going. I am shaking. This is crazy.
I dont know why I am working myself up like this.
I just slammed my foot into my chair....Man my toes are killing me now.
See how nervous I am.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 48
That's so great that you are going to a meeting even though you are scared. Reading from you and scaredycat (sp?) gives me more courage to go to my first NA meeting in 15 years. I'd love to hear how it goes for both of you. I'm on the west coast so it won't be for another few hours yet.
Looking For Myself...Sober
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Where the heart is
Posts: 10,209
Oh my goodness..I think I broke my toe!!! OOwwwchhhhh!!!
Ok well I am off. Talked to the doc. Gotta stop there first and the pharmacy. I am going to my cousins right sfter the meeting so I will be back and let you all know how it goes.
Ok well I am off. Talked to the doc. Gotta stop there first and the pharmacy. I am going to my cousins right sfter the meeting so I will be back and let you all know how it goes.
Looking For Myself...Sober
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Where the heart is
Posts: 10,209
Just my freakin luck...I get there and all the doors are locked. Noone outside. I called home to make sure I had the right place. And it was. I wonder how freakin old that list is they gave me.
Man I am so disappointed. I was all ready and there.
So I guess I will call the place I got the list from tomorrow and see what the hell is up with that.
Got my script. I was all excited and calmed down and ready.
I am so bummed right now.
And everyone in my family was all proud of me for going.
This sux!
Man I am so disappointed. I was all ready and there.
So I guess I will call the place I got the list from tomorrow and see what the hell is up with that.
Got my script. I was all excited and calmed down and ready.
I am so bummed right now.
And everyone in my family was all proud of me for going.
This sux!
get it, give it, grow in it
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Calif coast
Posts: 3,167
This is just a test that will make you more determined tomorrow. maybe go to two mtgs. tomorrow am & pm. there is always away to get what you need.Current mtg. list are on the Internet for ea. area.
Looking For Myself...Sober
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Where the heart is
Posts: 10,209
The NA site says the closest one is 90 miles away. I just need to call where i got this list and get an updated one.
I live in the country somewhat. It is a drive to get to anything almost.
I live in the country somewhat. It is a drive to get to anything almost.
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