Aristo

I am please to announce that after a fearless search <cough, cough> I mean hopeless procrastination........... I now have a sponsor again.

You may recall a good few months back that my sponsor had busted, so I sacked him.

But yesterday, my good ol' HP put everything in place and aligned the universe for me and after a bit of a run (to catch up to him) - I zipped up my emotional bullet proof vest, to protect myself from the imagined fear that had built up in me for so long, and asked to question to a fella who I have seen and heard in the rooms.

You know that saying 'if you want what we have......' Well I wanted what this guy has. A good hearted guy, with a sense of peace and serenity, a keen sense of humour, a positive outlook on life and more than a decade of good recovery !

I am nervous , yet excited about resuming the steps. I have a positive attitude about working on the myself and this time, I have vowed to do the suggested things to the best of my ability !

Aristo out

CarolD

Forward we go..side by side

barb dwyer

all RIGHT, Aristo !!!!!

(I love it - zipped up yer emotional bullet proof vest - cute!)

Jersey Nonny

Good for you! Isn't is funny how fragile we are...and so afraid of being rejected?
Glad you found someone else...and, didn't become discouraged after the experience with the other sponsor.

Aristo

Thanks folks -

Had a good talk to my new sponsor yesterday - He's keep to get cracking on the steps.

I'm up to Step 4 and have nearly 5 months up. So Now the tough, brutal honesty begins.

You're right JN - I was very fearful of being rejected. However, my logical thinking brain was telling me all the right things like, it doesn't matter, it's not meant to be, you can find someone else, it's not the end of the world (if he can't sponsor me) - It was worse than asking a girl out on a date - for me.

The fear and anxiety just over-rode all these thoughts - BUT, I did manage to finally pluck up the courage.

Since coming out of re-hab nearly 5 months ago, I am very aware of my feelings and still analyse these to death instead of just feeling and accepting them. I guess it will take a while to acclimatise.

I think I'm on the right path - and although I was down on myself for all the things I am not doing, I am ticking these off the list very slowly one by one. Thanks to the support of people around me and the great folks here on SR !

Anna

Good for you Aristo!

I'm glad you are doing what you need to do to stay sober.

NOMOMERLOTMAMMA

I too, have avoided getting a sponsor. My excuse is that the folks that I like in meetings, and talk to the most, are men. I've always felt more comfy with men. So, I'm looking around for a woman to sponsor me. Almost was going to ask one woman a few weeks ago, but after she shared I thought that she had a lot going on personally and decided against it.

I need one. I'm sober, but I'm not feeling great. I know it's cause I'm not working a program. Getting a sponsor is my goal for the week!

Jersey Nonny

I know it's strongly suggested, "Men for Men, Women for Women"...but, there are occasional "exceptions to the rule". I've known oldtimers, men and women, who've sponsored members of the opposite sex. As a matter of fact, I once had a male sponsor for quite a while (until he moved too far out of my area to keep in touch). Of course, he happened to be gay...although I don't think it had any affect on his/my sobriety...he worked a great program, and taught me a lot to get me through some rough spots in early sobriety.

Aristo

Funny story: I was at a meeting the other day this guy got up and shared. He was a regular relapser and has been coming to meetings for years. He shared that he had a new sponsor - a girl - who was less than 90 days sober.

Strange, I thought.... never heard of that before and was sure that wasn't the suggested way of doing things.....

Then I found out that he was stoned at the meeting........

Bugger -

I must admit to laughing a little.

NOMOMERLOTMAMMA

Thanks Nonny. I'm a lesbian, so could I possibly have a male sponsor? There is this one man who I greatly admire..many years sober, kids, divorced, I feel we have much in common. He's at a ton of meetings..I'm gonna start a new thread on this subject, not to highjack this one!