Change4life

Had a drug dream last night and as soon as I opened my eyes this morning the thought of using creeped right in. I am over tired from working so many hours and I have to spend a good portion of the day fighting off my urges to use. today I dont think i will be very successful. I have court in the morning and I am really afraid they are going to lock me up. Its really screwing with my head. I really want to do some coke and dont see me being able to stop myself. I just wish I could take the day off stay in bed watch TV. I finally feel like this might be a safe zone. the traffic coming in and out has stopped. I really need down time and time to be alone. I hope I make it through this day without doing too much damage. Not much any of you can help me with . I am typing this as I am on my way out the door. i could use some support right now, but I am running late and have no time to wait for replies. this really sucks.
I DONT WANT TO GO. I NEED REST!!!
hoping everyone else is doing well.
Love to you all,
Beth

stone

Sending you love and support Beth.

Dont go too crazy today, OK?

Hope

Don't use today.

It will make you feel even worse than you feel now when you come down.

A choice you make in an instant to get high to feel a temporary gain, will end up coming back to bite you with a life time of pain.

Don't give up a day of your precious life for many days of drug induced pain.

Whatever comes, you can face it and deal with it.

Court and everything else.

You also have a choice not to use. Everything else is excuses. Talk back to those urges and realize that it is LIES trying to get you back.

However, overworking yourself is dangerous. Being too tired causes cravings. You have to focus on yourself and take care of yourself first. You are more important and your recovery needs to come first.

Go to a meeting today.

Luckyv2

((((Beth))))

I have been so down the past few days it is pathetic. I even have the thoughts going through my head that maybe it wouldn't hurt to get high. But I am not going to listen to my head. I know from plenty of experience that it will hurt and I will be way worse off than before. And since I have been homeless, jobless, institutions, Jails, the only thing left is death and today I choose to live.

I hope that maybe both of us can get through this funk. I have been updating my space, and think ****it. but I know that isn't right either. Sending both of us hugs and anyone else that may need one.

GlassPrisoner

Don't run yourself ragged. Fatigue is a huge trigger for me. Remember HALT. If you get tired, rest. Period. No matter what you 'think' you have to do.

Aysha

Beth..I wish you felt better.
Change that doubt to a definate..You will be successful.
I know how you feel about court.
I will be doing the same in 2 weeks.
And my using dreams have returned.
Went from nightmares to using dreams. UUUHHHGGGGG!!!
Hang in there. I will be thinking of you.

Alive

hey..sometimes we feel down, without a reason...but we still can know deep in our hearts we're in it to make it..keep positive..remember laws of attraction...
take care, my friend...you're doing great!

Dee74

seeing as you're long gone out the door, I can't give you any advice...so just
((((beth))))

D