Lbad

Kevin your post reminded me of this I heard in a mtg, "if you are at home alone and suffering..... you are hanging out with a killer" go to a mtg or coffee or something.
love you
Bad

Anna

Kevin,

I hope you are feeling better.

lostmdboy

Hey Keven, I have that anger issue too. It just sneaks up on me, I never really see it coming. I am getting better, but I think I will always have to watch it. Hope you are feeling better today.

nogard

Went to a meeting and spent a long time with a friend. Exhausted and pissed off, no angry and its ok to be angry and if people are being fking stupid its ok to be angry at them too.

Hey Steph, dust yourself of and start again.

Kevin

Rowan

Glad you made it, Kevin.

lostmdboy

Well Keven I figure if my HP can for give me for being a drunk, and P%&^#ing on everyones life around me. I guess I can for give some peeps for being stupid. At least try. IT IS HARD AT TIMES!! :d

nogard

still here back to basics a couple of hours at a time

AAFreeportPA

Hello Kevin.

I'll admit that I was a little angry this last week. And nervous. And all those other feelings. I even harbored a slight resentment when I didn't immediately get to a meeting. But I prayed and turned it over to the One who has all Power.

Just remember that as upset one may get one doesn't need to drink Just For Today over it. Then that anger eventually subsides. Not immediately, though. It takes time.

I enjoy your sense of humor. You're one of the many people here who inspire me to stick with Recovery and open up more in my various writings here. Things will get better.

I hope you feel better soon. Just don't drink Just For Today.

Yours in Recovery, Mark B.

nogard

HI Mark,

I struggled yesterday and most of Today (Sun evening here) andmy fingers are sore from hanging on. The anger and teh obsession to use became a noise inside my boday it was horrendous.

This evening I am begining to surface I think, certainly feeling better.

I read both your posts this morning and they really helped me thanks Mark.

Kevin

Pilgrim

Thinking of you tonight Kev. I hope you can find some peace soon hun.

Rusty Zipper

hope today is a bit better kev... (...)

nogard

Actually today has got better and better between my ears and in my heart and I thought I was gone, in fact I was as I was powerless and would have caved in eventually. I am feeling better and stronger and like I have crossed some major point for me.

Thanks for your support.

Steph you just keep on as thats what we need to do. I keep seeing the faces of the guys from my town who did not make 14 of them and so long since I thought of them, I am here and they are not and it has nothing to do with Gods grace as thats an insult to them.

I have this feeling that I want to grab life and live it, brush away the shadows and the remants of fear and setp out and live life the best I can. Thats what I will be trying on fronm now.



Kevin

Missymae737

Nogard,

There is so much strength when ever you reply to a post. I know you can get through this...It is OK to be angry as long as you keep it in check, feel it and then begin to heal from it...

Love and peace

nogard

Thanks ((((Missy))))) am doing much better now and am touched by your reply and all the others.

Kevin

Luckyv2

Hey Kevin! Glad that you are here. You know thoughts are neither right or wrong...it is how we act upon those thoughts that are right or wrong. I know that I get that stinking thinking also going on....Well I should go have a drink or a high but I know that I have never been able to have a drink or a high.

Every time that I convince myself that I can...well we know what happens then and it isn't pretty. Especially when I know what the Program teaches us. I have had a head full of NA/AA and a mind full of Drugs (alcohol is a drug) and then I am on a suicide mission that is for sure. One thing that we must remember is that it isn't the train that kills us it is the engine. Glad that you are working through it that is the admiration that I look too.....

Have a Good Day My Friend!

nogard

Vic you have it absolutely right. And for being open and honest I get all this and more from SR and the fellowship and my HP.

As you say I am working through it and something has changed not sure what but its there.

Kevin

AAFreeportPA

Another secret: You aren't alone. I felt the same thing last weekend. And I thought hard about what I really truly had and what I wanted. And I came close to pondering whether or not I should drink. And for the first time in my life I actually knocked my knees and asked for a sign.

The next day my boss fell ill. And that shook me up further. The Lord works in mysterious ways.

But from that I found a strength I didn't know I had. Or maybe it was there but I was afraid to acknowledge it. I was confused and needed something outside of myself to restore me to sanity. And I knew a drink just wouldn't cut it. Not Today.

The point is that we're all here. For we can't do this alone. That it helps to have a shoulder to lean on or an open mind willing to listen. And especially a human being who can understand.

You're a better person for acknowledging that you have troubles. And God knows we all have our fair share. We are not perfect by any stretch of the imagination.

I'm glad you feel better. Things can always get worse. Just know that you're better now and can take something from this moment to persevere through the day.

Yours in Recovery, Mark B.

stone

Hi Kev, glad you are feeling a bit better mate. Huge hugs dude.

Misscat

Crumbling How?
Its hard, but stick it out!!

GlassPrisoner

Two things. One, seem to be. This is a disease of perception. Remember when things really were crumbling around us, and we didn't see it ?

Two, by crumbling, do you mean not getting your way ? That's usually the root cause of my anger, depression, etc. It's hard to force acceptance, I know. Just remember the old (tired) cliché, "You're right where your supposed to be". Do the next indicated right thing, and have faith. Things always resolve themselves, usually for the better.