a plea for assistance...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: WI
Posts: 180
a plea for assistance...
Hi folks...
I'm Nan and I'm looking for some advice or help or anything at this point. I am 46 years old and I quit drinking for three months last year. I was doing fine, but I missed the romantic, fun parts of drinking that our minds hang on to...a nice glass of wine with dinner, a nice cold home brew on the deck, etc.(yes, I am a home brewer). Unfortunately, drinking doesn't feel very fun for me any longer. I feel like I need to do it and it's become a bit of a habit. I am never what you could call drunk and disorderly, I never drive while buzzed and my life isn't terrible...but I feel very cranky if I can't have my beer while making supper and it really seems to have a hold on me. I attempted to drink moderately after my three month sobriety and I was right back to square one within three months of my moderation attempt. I won't go to AA, I tried it in the past and hated it, PLUS I'm an atheist. Does anybody here have a similar story? What did you do? If anyone can recommend a good book to read about this, I would also appreciate it. I feel like this will eventually take a toll on my physical health...I wish I could just moderate but it seems like that just won't work for me. Thanks for reading, folks!
I'm Nan and I'm looking for some advice or help or anything at this point. I am 46 years old and I quit drinking for three months last year. I was doing fine, but I missed the romantic, fun parts of drinking that our minds hang on to...a nice glass of wine with dinner, a nice cold home brew on the deck, etc.(yes, I am a home brewer). Unfortunately, drinking doesn't feel very fun for me any longer. I feel like I need to do it and it's become a bit of a habit. I am never what you could call drunk and disorderly, I never drive while buzzed and my life isn't terrible...but I feel very cranky if I can't have my beer while making supper and it really seems to have a hold on me. I attempted to drink moderately after my three month sobriety and I was right back to square one within three months of my moderation attempt. I won't go to AA, I tried it in the past and hated it, PLUS I'm an atheist. Does anybody here have a similar story? What did you do? If anyone can recommend a good book to read about this, I would also appreciate it. I feel like this will eventually take a toll on my physical health...I wish I could just moderate but it seems like that just won't work for me. Thanks for reading, folks!
let it grow!
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 15,540
nice to meet you, nan07. welcome!
you'll hear from others soon, with more experience than me with quitting - i'm a parent of an alcoholic, so i only have that side of this story to offer. i will tell you this - recovery is possible. blessings, k
you'll hear from others soon, with more experience than me with quitting - i'm a parent of an alcoholic, so i only have that side of this story to offer. i will tell you this - recovery is possible. blessings, k
Not all better, getting better
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: The Beautiful Inner Banks of NC
Posts: 1,702
Check out the Secular Connections portion of the forums. Here's a link http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...r-connections/
There are many options available other than AA, though few provide the face to face support that AA does. Take care.
There are many options available other than AA, though few provide the face to face support that AA does. Take care.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Hi Nan...
I just replied to BF with this....
Here is a link full of information
excerpts from the book that convinced me to quit drinking
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...influence.html
Glad you are here!
I just replied to BF with this....
Here is a link full of information
excerpts from the book that convinced me to quit drinking
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...influence.html
Glad you are here!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,236
Hi Nan. My name is Sharon and Im an Alcoholic.
By the grace of my HP and like you here in SR
I havent had a drink of alcohol since 8-11-90.
For that and you I am truely grateful.
I wonder myself what happens to the romance
after one quits drinking....there was always something
about drinking, men and music that went hand and
hand for me....
Altho i was married and with kids....i always felt alone
while at home drinking....so me myself and i I wondered
into a local club where all the excitement was and
people who drank like I. It was were i felt comfy at.
Of course after awhile of doing that the guilt and shame
and remorse set in and i had to drink more to numb
those feelings....
The more i drank the more i spiraled out of control.
Right into a car accident in the wee hours alone
running off the road hitting a concrete culvert
sitting on top the ground....
I took my one and only ride in the back of an
EMS truck and dont remeber a thing....rats....
I spent 10 days in the hospital with them
removing my punctured spleen are i would
have bled to death...
With many broken ribs and contusions etc...
I healed up quite nicely in 3 months....
Then u will never guess what happened next...
Those 3 months i didnt drink because i
had pain pills to help me cope....but as
soon as there was no more pain to relieve...
I picked up a drink....and yep,,, ur right,,,,i
was back at the club doing the same things
i so enjoyed before....
This time ...another night...oh wait...my accident
was in Feb 90....its now Aug 90...i came home
late to another arguement....then i made a dare to my
husband that i had had enough and that just
maybe i will take my life....
He thought i was kidden and told me to go to
sleep....sure i did after downing a hand full of
pills and wine....
Yep...i wanted to prove him wrong and did what
i set out to do...end my life....
The next day ...my little ones last day of
vacation bible school....no call no show....
the phone is ringing....kids cant wake me up....
then i heard a faint ringing of the phone when i
struggled to answer it....with slurred speech i
was then ordered out of bed....
To this day even tho it was my mother in law ...
I still believe it was my HP calling me to tell me to get up
because He wasnt thru with me yet....
So the next chain of events went like this....
A family intervention took place where the police
were called to come pick me up and take me
to rehab....
Yep i sure do remember that ride....lol...i felt like
a criminal...little ole Sharon hauled away in the back of
a handless police car....i was sooooo angry...so pissed
that my family did this to me....
With a month in rehab and recieveing the tools and
knowledgeof my disease and recovery, i was set on the
path to learn how to life life on lifes terms one day at
a time with out alcohol....
I also learned that my family did for me what i couldnt
do for myself.....
For that and them i have to be eternally grateful.
and so....my soul purpose in life today is ...is to
help the next person in recovery to achieve sobriety
by sharing my own experiences , strengths and hopes
with them....
And thats how it works for me.
Thanks for letting me share.
By the grace of my HP and like you here in SR
I havent had a drink of alcohol since 8-11-90.
For that and you I am truely grateful.
I wonder myself what happens to the romance
after one quits drinking....there was always something
about drinking, men and music that went hand and
hand for me....
Altho i was married and with kids....i always felt alone
while at home drinking....so me myself and i I wondered
into a local club where all the excitement was and
people who drank like I. It was were i felt comfy at.
Of course after awhile of doing that the guilt and shame
and remorse set in and i had to drink more to numb
those feelings....
The more i drank the more i spiraled out of control.
Right into a car accident in the wee hours alone
running off the road hitting a concrete culvert
sitting on top the ground....
I took my one and only ride in the back of an
EMS truck and dont remeber a thing....rats....
I spent 10 days in the hospital with them
removing my punctured spleen are i would
have bled to death...
With many broken ribs and contusions etc...
I healed up quite nicely in 3 months....
Then u will never guess what happened next...
Those 3 months i didnt drink because i
had pain pills to help me cope....but as
soon as there was no more pain to relieve...
I picked up a drink....and yep,,, ur right,,,,i
was back at the club doing the same things
i so enjoyed before....
This time ...another night...oh wait...my accident
was in Feb 90....its now Aug 90...i came home
late to another arguement....then i made a dare to my
husband that i had had enough and that just
maybe i will take my life....
He thought i was kidden and told me to go to
sleep....sure i did after downing a hand full of
pills and wine....
Yep...i wanted to prove him wrong and did what
i set out to do...end my life....
The next day ...my little ones last day of
vacation bible school....no call no show....
the phone is ringing....kids cant wake me up....
then i heard a faint ringing of the phone when i
struggled to answer it....with slurred speech i
was then ordered out of bed....
To this day even tho it was my mother in law ...
I still believe it was my HP calling me to tell me to get up
because He wasnt thru with me yet....
So the next chain of events went like this....
A family intervention took place where the police
were called to come pick me up and take me
to rehab....
Yep i sure do remember that ride....lol...i felt like
a criminal...little ole Sharon hauled away in the back of
a handless police car....i was sooooo angry...so pissed
that my family did this to me....
With a month in rehab and recieveing the tools and
knowledgeof my disease and recovery, i was set on the
path to learn how to life life on lifes terms one day at
a time with out alcohol....
I also learned that my family did for me what i couldnt
do for myself.....
For that and them i have to be eternally grateful.
and so....my soul purpose in life today is ...is to
help the next person in recovery to achieve sobriety
by sharing my own experiences , strengths and hopes
with them....
And thats how it works for me.
Thanks for letting me share.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 294
Hi, Nan, Welcome to SR. There a people on these boards who have gotten (and stayed!) sober without AA. They're better resources for info on that than I am, as I am in AA. Hope that link that Tyler gave you had some useful info. As for books I would recommend, the most helpful book for me was the Big Book. While it is an AA book, you certainly don't have to be in AA to find it helpful. There are a lot of inspiring stories in it. With regards to romanticizing alcohol, I think many of us have done that and it can be a hinderance to recovery. one way I keep those thoughts at bay is by countering any positive, romanticized thought I may have about alcohol with a starkly realistic thought about my alcoholism... that usually helps because, if i am honest with myself about my inability to consume alcohol, that fact trumps my desire to drink. Best of luck.
Welcome Nan came-came to-came to believe
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: east coast
Posts: 1,116
Welcome Nan-
I believe that AA is a spiritual program NOT religious (thank goodness).
The idea is to have a power greater than yourself-whatever that may be-the great outdoors, or the fellowship. Many folks in my home group have used the fellowship or the "group" as their higher power until they discovered what worked for them.
The idea is to have a power or a force that is greater than us--be it universal vibes!
Me being the boss or the one in control got me into a lot of trouble.
I am sure there are others that can put it more "eloquently".
AA is a program that teaches me how to live. Once we get over the “little” things we can get into action and learn how to live. Drinking or not drinking for that matter. Is just the tip of the iceberg.
Again, welcome and good luck!
I believe that AA is a spiritual program NOT religious (thank goodness).
The idea is to have a power greater than yourself-whatever that may be-the great outdoors, or the fellowship. Many folks in my home group have used the fellowship or the "group" as their higher power until they discovered what worked for them.
The idea is to have a power or a force that is greater than us--be it universal vibes!
Me being the boss or the one in control got me into a lot of trouble.
I am sure there are others that can put it more "eloquently".
AA is a program that teaches me how to live. Once we get over the “little” things we can get into action and learn how to live. Drinking or not drinking for that matter. Is just the tip of the iceberg.
Again, welcome and good luck!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: WI
Posts: 180
Originally Posted by aasharon90 
Hi Nan. My name is Sharon and Im an Alcoholic.
By the grace of my HP and like you here in SR
I havent had a drink of alcohol since 8-11-90.
For that and you I am truely grateful.
I wonder myself what happens to the romance
after one quits drinking....there was always something
about drinking, men and music that went hand and
hand for me....
Altho i was married and with kids....i always felt alone
while at home drinking....so me myself and i I wondered
into a local club where all the excitement was and
people who drank like I. It was were i felt comfy at.
Of course after awhile of doing that the guilt and shame
and remorse set in and i had to drink more to numb
those feelings....
The more i drank the more i spiraled out of control.
Right into a car accident in the wee hours alone
running off the road hitting a concrete culvert
sitting on top the ground....
I took my one and only ride in the back of an
EMS truck and dont remeber a thing....rats....
I spent 10 days in the hospital with them
removing my punctured spleen are i would
have bled to death...
With many broken ribs and contusions etc...
I healed up quite nicely in 3 months....
Then u will never guess what happened next...
Those 3 months i didnt drink because i
had pain pills to help me cope....but as
soon as there was no more pain to relieve...
I picked up a drink....and yep,,, ur right,,,,i
was back at the club doing the same things
i so enjoyed before....
This time ...another night...oh wait...my accident
was in Feb 90....its now Aug 90...i came home
late to another arguement....then i made a dare to my
husband that i had had enough and that just
maybe i will take my life....
He thought i was kidden and told me to go to
sleep....sure i did after downing a hand full of
pills and wine....
Yep...i wanted to prove him wrong and did what
i set out to do...end my life....
The next day ...my little ones last day of
vacation bible school....no call no show....
the phone is ringing....kids cant wake me up....
then i heard a faint ringing of the phone when i
struggled to answer it....with slurred speech i
was then ordered out of bed....
To this day even tho it was my mother in law ...
I still believe it was my HP calling me to tell me to get up
because He wasnt thru with me yet....
So the next chain of events went like this....
A family intervention took place where the police
were called to come pick me up and take me
to rehab....
Yep i sure do remember that ride....lol...i felt like
a criminal...little ole Sharon hauled away in the back of
a handless police car....i was sooooo angry...so pissed
that my family did this to me....
With a month in rehab and recieveing the tools and
knowledgeof my disease and recovery, i was set on the
path to learn how to life life on lifes terms one day at
a time with out alcohol....
I also learned that my family did for me what i couldnt
do for myself.....
For that and them i have to be eternally grateful.
and so....my soul purpose in life today is ...is to
help the next person in recovery to achieve sobriety
by sharing my own experiences , strengths and hopes
with them....
And thats how it works for me.
Thanks for letting me share.
By the grace of my HP and like you here in SR
I havent had a drink of alcohol since 8-11-90.
For that and you I am truely grateful.
I wonder myself what happens to the romance
after one quits drinking....there was always something
about drinking, men and music that went hand and
hand for me....
Altho i was married and with kids....i always felt alone
while at home drinking....so me myself and i I wondered
into a local club where all the excitement was and
people who drank like I. It was were i felt comfy at.
Of course after awhile of doing that the guilt and shame
and remorse set in and i had to drink more to numb
those feelings....
The more i drank the more i spiraled out of control.
Right into a car accident in the wee hours alone
running off the road hitting a concrete culvert
sitting on top the ground....
I took my one and only ride in the back of an
EMS truck and dont remeber a thing....rats....
I spent 10 days in the hospital with them
removing my punctured spleen are i would
have bled to death...
With many broken ribs and contusions etc...
I healed up quite nicely in 3 months....
Then u will never guess what happened next...
Those 3 months i didnt drink because i
had pain pills to help me cope....but as
soon as there was no more pain to relieve...
I picked up a drink....and yep,,, ur right,,,,i
was back at the club doing the same things
i so enjoyed before....
This time ...another night...oh wait...my accident
was in Feb 90....its now Aug 90...i came home
late to another arguement....then i made a dare to my
husband that i had had enough and that just
maybe i will take my life....
He thought i was kidden and told me to go to
sleep....sure i did after downing a hand full of
pills and wine....
Yep...i wanted to prove him wrong and did what
i set out to do...end my life....
The next day ...my little ones last day of
vacation bible school....no call no show....
the phone is ringing....kids cant wake me up....
then i heard a faint ringing of the phone when i
struggled to answer it....with slurred speech i
was then ordered out of bed....
To this day even tho it was my mother in law ...
I still believe it was my HP calling me to tell me to get up
because He wasnt thru with me yet....
So the next chain of events went like this....
A family intervention took place where the police
were called to come pick me up and take me
to rehab....
Yep i sure do remember that ride....lol...i felt like
a criminal...little ole Sharon hauled away in the back of
a handless police car....i was sooooo angry...so pissed
that my family did this to me....
With a month in rehab and recieveing the tools and
knowledgeof my disease and recovery, i was set on the
path to learn how to life life on lifes terms one day at
a time with out alcohol....
I also learned that my family did for me what i couldnt
do for myself.....
For that and them i have to be eternally grateful.
and so....my soul purpose in life today is ...is to
help the next person in recovery to achieve sobriety
by sharing my own experiences , strengths and hopes
with them....
And thats how it works for me.
Thanks for letting me share.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: WI
Posts: 180
Originally Posted by livefree
Hi, Nan, Welcome to SR. There a people on these boards who have gotten (and stayed!) sober without AA. They're better resources for info on that than I am, as I am in AA. Hope that link that Tyler gave you had some useful info. As for books I would recommend, the most helpful book for me was the Big Book. While it is an AA book, you certainly don't have to be in AA to find it helpful. There are a lot of inspiring stories in it. With regards to romanticizing alcohol, I think many of us have done that and it can be a hinderance to recovery. one way I keep those thoughts at bay is by countering any positive, romanticized thought I may have about alcohol with a starkly realistic thought about my alcoholism... that usually helps because, if i am honest with myself about my inability to consume alcohol, that fact trumps my desire to drink. Best of luck.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: WI
Posts: 180
Originally Posted by cali
Welcome Nan-
I believe that AA is a spiritual program NOT religious (thank goodness).
The idea is to have a power greater than yourself-whatever that may be-the great outdoors, or the fellowship. Many folks in my home group have used the fellowship or the "group" as their higher power until they discovered what worked for them.
The idea is to have a power or a force that is greater than us--be it universal vibes!
Me being the boss or the one in control got me into a lot of trouble.
I am sure there are others that can put it more "eloquently".
AA is a program that teaches me how to live. Once we get over the “little” things we can get into action and learn how to live. Drinking or not drinking for that matter. Is just the tip of the iceberg.
Again, welcome and good luck!
I believe that AA is a spiritual program NOT religious (thank goodness).
The idea is to have a power greater than yourself-whatever that may be-the great outdoors, or the fellowship. Many folks in my home group have used the fellowship or the "group" as their higher power until they discovered what worked for them.
The idea is to have a power or a force that is greater than us--be it universal vibes!
Me being the boss or the one in control got me into a lot of trouble.
I am sure there are others that can put it more "eloquently".
AA is a program that teaches me how to live. Once we get over the “little” things we can get into action and learn how to live. Drinking or not drinking for that matter. Is just the tip of the iceberg.
Again, welcome and good luck!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: WI
Posts: 180
Originally Posted by CarolD
Hi Nan...
I just replied to BF with this....
Here is a link full of information
excerpts from the book that convinced me to quit drinking
Glad you are here!
I just replied to BF with this....
Here is a link full of information
excerpts from the book that convinced me to quit drinking
Glad you are here!
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