Nervous about NA
 

I have never been to a meeting before. I really havent even been to program except my week back in March at inpatient that I left.
Op is jerking me around.
They have a meeting on Mondays where I live and I want to check it out.
But I am so nervous.
I am not the type to care what anyone thinks or let other people bother me.
But for some reason I am so nervous about opening up in a F2F atmosphere.
What type of people will be there. Will I know anyone. What will they think of my story.
You guys have seen when I open up I am not shy. I tell it all and like it is.
And I am like that all the time in everyday life.
But for some reason this meeting thing has me nervous. Unsure of myself.
ANy advice?

Hi Chiy :)

Best advice on the first meeting, arrive sit down and listen carefully. People will come and say hello. Just listen for the similiarities and give yourself a break, relax and enjoy it. I love meetings and enjoy seeing new members come along. Lucky NA group to have you as a member.

Kevin

You will be surrounded with people just like us!!!! I know it doesn't help to be told don't be nervous....but don't be nervous, you will be fine..like Kevin said, people will come and welcome you! I am always so proud when there is a newcomer, it is the bravest and scariest thing you can do. Hold your head high and get that surrender chip!!

Good luck, Cathy

Thanks..I think I am gonna do it tomorrow. I am gonna try like hell anyway.
I need to do something. I cant just do what I have been doing. Which is half assed attempts at treatment and not following through. I need something.
I am scared that when and if the time comes when someone asks me what brought me there. And I have to say I relapsed and tried to kill myself. And i mean totally lost my mind and the way I did it. I mean it is insane.
I think thats what bothers me. Because it hasnt really sunk in what I did until now. I have been stepping back and looking in on myself. And I must have totally snapped to do what I did. I feel stupid..really weak and embarrassed that I would go to those lengths.
It hasnt sunk in becuase I was so out of it and dont remember most of it.
So I have to ask questions to people that were there and really think about it to get the affect from it.
And I seriously must be mental.
How do people react to that?
I am ashamed. I dont like telling my Drs when they ask.
But I am the type if I am gonna tell a story..I am gonna tell it all. Because it is all part of why I am where I am.
Maybe I shouldnt talk at all.
I'm good for not knowing when to shut up.
But anyway. I think I will do that. ANd just sit in the back or something and just listen. I need to do more of that anyway.

You will be with your peers, they understand and won't judge you. Good for you for realising that you need to take action.

Kevin

You'll be just fine=) Meetings have been a saving grace for me. Just go in and be yourself. Depending upon what type of a meeting it is, there might be a speaker or you might read a step or a tradition followed by discussion. I've never been to a meeting where anyone is forced to speak. So, if you are feeling shy, it's OK. I'm glad to hear you are going.

I think Kevin is right Chiynita...it'll be a lucky NA group that has you as a member !

D

Not much to add to that except to say it really is true, I have been to about 10 AA meetings and only shared once and even then it was for about 2 mins lol. I will share when I feel like sharing and when the situation feels comfortable. Your truthfulness will be an asset to your recovery Chi.

Hey Chiynita,
Meetings are great even for a panic attack-high-anxiety mess like me. The type of people there are people like you and your story will be very similar to theirs. It's amazing how alike we are. Today is my 73rd meeting in row and I can't wait till it's time for todays' . I did not say a word for more than 30 meetings. No one made me feel awkward or outa place. Meetings saved my life.
Good Luck
Love,
Magellan

Chiy...

It is downright scary as hell to attend a first meeting.

I had totalled two cars one on booze one on tranq's..

And when I went to my first (AA) meeting I thought..I don't want to be

around some wino's in filthy clothes..what if I get fleas? (really)

But you will find folks (you are exactly right Surley!) just like us here

on SR!

All the stories, all the sharing of experience..strength..and hope..

shared here..you will hear there...

And they will welcome you with open arms of love just as we do here!

lOVE,

IO

That goes for NA as well..

I'm a member of both!

dont see any problem here chiy...

good wishes, and just be the real, new improved you...

xxoo, rz

Being nervous about going to the 1st meeting is normal. It might take a while for the fear to subside. But I will let you know that they are people just like us here that will reach out and help. You don't have to say anything if you don't want to. I think that you will like it though it has been a safe place for me

Like Vic say's being nervous is a totally normal reaction. It's normal because you are going into a group of people you don't know and possibly sharing very personal details of your life. It is normal because I'm sure you are going through some inner struggle about using and this is a positive step towards NOT using. Part of your brain is going to react negatively towards that.

What I can tell you, from my personal experience, is that nobody will preasure you to share any more than you are comfortable with. If you don't want to share at all, that is ok too. Most likely people will approach you and welcome you because they don't reconize you. Some may offer their phone numbers, so you will have someone to call if you need support. At some point in the meeting they may ask any "newcommers" to introduce themselves. You dont' have to do this if you don't want to, but I would recommend it. All you have to do is give your first name and most people follow it with "and I'm an addict" but if you don't want to, you don't even have to do that.

The most important thing to remember is that almost every single person that you meet has felt exactly the same as you feel the first time they come there. Very few people, are exicted and happy about going to their first meeting, though some are. As others have said, what you will find is a group of people similar to the motley crew you find here!! They are there to help and be helped. Take care.

think of us walking in there next to you, chiy - blessings, k

(i can't WAIT to hear your story following that meeting...)