nogard

Sad to leave SR in this way and I will try not to be bitter. I said something in the Mums thread that was insensiitive and was rightly shouted at. I apologised and tried to move on. However, c'est la vie posted the link below and I begged Anna to remove it she refused. It basically accuses me of supporting the abuse of women.

I want to say that I do not support the abuse of women in any circumstances.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...6-post220.html

Thanks for all your support and all the best from me.

Bye.

Kevin

stone

I too have no idea what it is all about but you would be a huge loss to SR Kev.

Alive

Whatever you do, just don't let go of your recovery, that's the most important thing for you!Keep counting!

Astro

Kevin, on any cyber forum posts can be misinterpreted, misconstrued, taken out of text, misread, confused, etc. etc. etc. Whatever this is about, it probably isn't worth getting too worked up over.

So how about sticking around? Anybody who doesn't appreciate what you have to say is free to use the ignore option. I'll choose to keep reading your posts because I appreciate your inspiration and wisdom.

It's all good, OK?

SaTiT

nogard...

here my ESH,
I went the kind of thing especificlly on a thread to pertains to abussive
relationship. I totally do not approve abuse to anyone in anyway.
And somtimes people just eat to much bons, bons and wactches
too much ophra..
Sometimes certain books, films, or program are gear up to certain people.
And the damn media...gee wizz man.. there's so many damn experts.
I can't distinguish news or intertament anymore. Or just an opinion
of who has the damn camera and mic. And the damn blame game
gets a spin from all kinds of direction. Focus on the problem and
not the salutions.

Oki doki...no short forms for me today.
I've been abused all my life..from the day I was born.
And it kind of fcuked me up in so many ways that I saw everything
half ass backwards and fruactured. I have triggers all over the place.

Denial runs deep very, very deep...But there's a common theme or string.
In other words the principle of it ....
Drugs and alcoholic abuse
alcohol abuse
relationship abuse
ABUSE.

When you are in an abusive relationship. You will be in total denial.
It kind of like the stockham syndrome
The $68 question or answer to why women continue to stay in an abusive
relationship. Oki doki...If I throw the word MEN in there as the victim,
some people might go into shock get dizzy and faint.

anyhow..not too long ago..I decide not to play victim and I get someone
that totally just went off the handle..hated my sorry ass screaming
Ban...ban..ban...
But you know, sometime we hate poeple that reminds us of oursleves the most.
Becuase it's like looking in the mirrow and it kind of make you wanna throw up.

Okay..but I can walk the talk...
"You gotta want it...inspite of it all, inspite who you might think are arss..."
"Keep coming back no matter what"

hot damn here I am....
I suit up and showed up...

stone

I only kinda of understand Sattit but no change there lol
However the Moms thread is ultra-cliquey and men arent wanted there at all. I guess the title gives it away? However maybe it should have been in the womens forum from the start? Saying too much here lol!

SaTiT

stone

well..sometimes I follow directions...

heck no..I 'm won't step into a women confernce, when they're just
let it go and letting it out..that's just asking for trouble and a big mistake..lol
I won't even look in the link...lol
i won't watch ophra either...I'm from mars..lol

come on..dragon...sin is just a mistake

paulmh

Kevin

Being honest man, and I don't know anything at all about you excpet that you seem to have always been a pretty steady presence around here -

what possessed you to contribute in that way?

scootinbabe

hi there! as a mom from the thread from its inception, i know that men have been welcomed. i also know that many of us really like kevin and that he and others have posted there before and have been supported and accepted.

as for being ultra-cliquey, well that may be true. many of the moms have been daily posting there for 6-9 months and we have become friends. that may seem daunting, but i don't think anyone has been ignored or pushed off--certainly not on purpose. the thread was started by and for women who have small children who are trying to remain sober. that is what it is for. it was started when most of us were "newcomers" but we also had the mom thing as a common bond. moms are frequently isolated and share many of the same stresses. it's our little support group.

i haven't read anything other than kevin's original post and i don't know his motivation. i do know that i really appreciate having kevin on these boards and will stand by him.

please don't go kevin.

TamTam

Amen to that... and we are all guilty. It would be a d@mn quiet site if we all left after we made some waves.... I sincerely hope someone is out there saying, Wow, I'm sorry that whole situation happened, but boy have I learned something from it...

SaTiT

All of those children get older in age and become men and women
in the eyes of society. Sometimes they are forgotten. They continue
to try to live life thorugh the eyes of a wounded child.

The responsibilty of trying to do things as an adult become too
great to handle and with no tools to cope. They had to numb
themselves as children in order to survive the abuse. Sometime
they even have children and a child trying to raise a child become
too much..Sometimes they don't even know...and thought that's
just the way life is. Drugs and alcohol abuse was just an extension
of it..You numb yourself to survive or feel normal..whatever normal is.
Bascially just to cope

Not all alcoholics had been abused but a lot of them have been.
Being an abuse male child thats has a body of a man
..it is much more difficult to find help, the stima of it all.
You can even scan through SR mens room...No one wants to talk about it.
Most abused men are shy and have a hard time expressing themselves.
The pain instanly comes back the moment we sober up as if it was
yesterday..But as men , we shall never cry...

As male abused children once again we feel left out and misunderstood.
We are send off to anger management, but it dosen't really resovled your
pain totally. When women throw a blanket over the abuse issue..
there triggers going off all over the place..

Sometimes,..i get angery at my mother for bringing me into
this world..why did she let it go on for so long ?
and why the hell didn't she stop it. I am fortunate enough to still have my
mother. Seriouely..when we were facing these issue...it wasn't pretty.
I let all of my anger out at her and she broke down and cried..She felt
as if I was attacking her. I don't attack my mother
I too relize my mother had suffered very much. I always though my mother
had all the answers. I relize she is another human being, trying to cope.
and perhapes she too had been abuse as a child.
I love my mother very much..but today I charrish her.
I honor her for her trials and triumphs.

and I get to understand my alcohlic father father just a little bit better.
No..I don't go around the man too much these days..becuase he's still drunk.
I don't like his drinking, I hate it..

But all I have to do is wait until gradmother visit and wacth my father starts
acting like a little scared kid...

miss communicat

let the winds of heaven blow between you and the difficulty.

IE:

wait.
breathe.
wait some more.
do nothing out of: fear, defense, anger, indignation, self vindication....you will feel unsatisfied, we will miss your recovery, and leaving under such conditions keeps you, and us, living in a drama.

Use it for growth.

Doug

This one is gonna tank. I strongly suggest if you want to talk to Kevin about this, or anybody really, take it to a PM or email.