Nogard’s 2 year Tale
 

I came into recovery after an 11 year relapse that we loving call “research and development” to my horror I discovered that I could not use alcohol to prop up business pressures and my failing long term relationship, not to mention that I was not happy and had not been for the 20 years I had remained clean from 1975 – 2004. In that time I was drug free completely but stopped using a fantastic long term rehab in London but after 2 years was left with no support and without the concept of my addiction being a disease. In fact I thought I was cured and normal and was encouraged to think so. In that 20 years I did some amazing things including writing 11 books and having them published going to Uni and becoming a games designer/programmer. My disease used this time to keep obsessions going I was busy busy busy and I did everything to obsessive proportions.

In 2004/5 I discovered alcohol and slowly drank more and more. Within a year or two my addiction was in full flight and I started too demolish the business and all my relationships and of course myself. I managed to keep working until the last year and lost control of my bodily functions and was very sick.

Two years ago today I woke up as sick as ever and spent some time crawling across the floor to put the kettle on and then I had that ‘moment of clarity’ and saw I was at deaths door again and realised my addiction was back and killing me. I reached out here at SR and then at AA and then at NA and one day at a time for 730 days I have been doing the program; that is meetings (daily for me) talking to my HP daily, reading literature, service and spending time with members. At first I can not understand the steps and at around a year I started playing with them and told myself I was working them. Then when my Dad died in Dec last year I started using the steps in my daily live that is I started working them with my sponsor and putting them into action in my lief, this process continues for me.

Today I am happy too be Kevin, comfortable in my own skin and have found through my HP love and compassion for myself. Because of that I can now see everything clearer and have a perspective that continues to broaden and continues to amaze me. I no longer live in fear I live in love and try to act from love only. I have many friends and am content with everything just as it is. That is I accept whatever is at any moment. Of course I am not perfect but am progressing  The compulsion to use went long long ago and the obsession to use was removed sometime after 3 months.

To say I did not do this alone is a joke as I all I did and continue to do is the footwork as I said above and am able to hand the rest over. My HP, the fellowship and all of you do the rest. On my own I would be dead or very lost, but together ‘one day at a time’ I get to realise myself and therefore everything else.

Thank you all. You have my love and support through time.

Kevin

Thanks Morning Glory for the amazing Graphics :)

Nogard's Out Celebrating
 

Hi SR, :wave:

Nogard won't be posting tonight, he's gone out to celebrate his 2nd sobriety birthday, with a meeting and then dinner with some mates. :funjump:

He said he'll be doing the banana dance:nanarock and laughing "out loud"!!!!! (Kevin, I'd love to see the banana dance)

He says to tell you guys " thanks " for the great posts, he's been smiling all day, and he will be back at SR tomorrow to thank you guys personally.

and Kevin...don't stay up too late.

thanks for the share and inspiration kevbro...

keep doing whats workinging sobriety brother...

wey, hey hey!

xxoo, zip

lol thanks citychick. Off to bed tired by very happy and so grateful

Kevin

Thanks for sharing Kevin!

I loved the graphic that MG did for you too - it's awesome!

(((Kevin)))

Kevin,

Thank you for sharing; I am happy for and pround of you and your accomplishments around recovery.

~~~~~~~~~~

Angels have walked beside me
All my life--and they still do.

love you kevin, thanks for sharing. you are a daily inspiration and friend on these boards!

thanks guys :)

Congrats on two years, Nogard, and Happy Birthday! I'm happy that you're Kevin too, and grateful that you share your experience, strength, and hope in the programs of AA, NA, and here on SR. Thanks for being a daily inspiration Kevin!

Congrats on the 2 years!!! I hope you're celebration dinner was phenomenal!

what a great post. it gave me chills reading it. such positivity! what a beatiful thing this program is...

Your story made my cry......I am glad you are in my cyber-life.

Cathy

thanks for the messages and all the love and suppport of the last two years and a great 2nd Birthday :)

(((SRH)))