scootinbabe

**{jules}}

you are not a "bad" person; you are a sick one. this is a big wake-up call.

you just reached out to us for help--keep doing it. gather your arsenal of friends, therapists, family, tools that you've learned and beat this thing. call aa or na. call your therapist. don't let the truth make you a prisoner. get it out and get on with your recovery. you are worth fighting for--but you need to do the fighting. i'm so mad at this darn disease for you! kick its @ss please.

ig is so wise. her message is dead on. i hope that you are willling to go to any lengths too. you are sooo worth it, honey.

scootinbabe

way to go jules! dh loves you and wants the best for you, i'm sure. we all do.
but YOU need to too. want the best for yourself and fight for it. go to any lengths--so good to hear. now live it one minute at a time. you've done this before, you learned so much. i've heard you be strong for others--now do it for you.


(and i'm telling you, jules, that you need to save this message and play it back to me when i need it coming back at me. deal?)

scootinbabe

lolli--set your boundaries. find them--really think about this and determine what you can live with. then meet with your parents and lay the boundaries out for them.

my dh and i "hosted" my parents for about a year and a half in our home--this was pre-kids and when my mom was in her last 2-3 years of life. that period left damaged relationships on all sides. don't let this happen to you. tell them what you need from them--they are part of the family too and should have responsibilities. you wouldn't talk badly about them and they shouldn't do it to you either. that is not a loving relationship. ask for respect and give it in return. that's not asking much at all--that's just courtesy. (now believe me, you can come here and talk about them all you like to us...but that's therapy and we won't tell on you ;-)

you are not whining, honey, and even if you are, this is the place to do it! lord knows i've whined enough here! and like i said, whining is better than wining! tee-hee!

ps. your son sounds awesome. you obviously have done a good job there!

**{liss}}

jules1973

Deal Scoot...I promise to play it back for you.
I am so sad right now and just so freaking lonely. I am not sure what to do...I just want to numb it, you know?
But I do want to go to any lenghts and I want to fight these urges.....I just want to feel normal again.

scootinbabe

ok, so i sit here giving advice? i better go get away from that addiction (advice-giving, since i'm just another deeply flawed person myself) and this addiction (computer time rather than f2f) and be with my family on our vacation. see, i need to ask for willingness and guidance on all aspects of my life!

love to you all. i can't thank God enough for putting this thread and each other in our lives. this place has saved me many times!

**{hugs to mommas off to start a new day!}}

TamTam

((((Jules)))) We love you and will always love you- you have to be ready to get your hands dirty now and get to work. It is all there for you if you want it. Proud of you for reaching out.

Love you- Tammy

TamTam

Scoot- where are the o.c. meetings

TamTam

Liss- You made a deal to them, but... when you gave birth you made a deal to your kids- most important!!! You need to tell daddy that he either respects you and helps you do best for your kids or you will have to do it without them.

scootinbabe

oops, jules just saw message.

it's okay. you are detoxing right now? be easy on yourself. it's okay to be sad and lonely. sit with the feelings for awhile. you screwed up. okay. we all have. allow yourself to wallow for awhile and then, when you are ready, pick yourself up, brush that stuff away, and get on with your healing.

you don't need to be lonely. you just need to be open. be willing. reach out. we're here and so are others all around you. they are only a meeting or phone call away. ask your hp to put the right people in your life and open the door. you are on your way...

scootinbabe

Tam--you asked?

ANAHEIM--Sunday meetings

10:00 AM (C) MEN S RECOVERY,9581 #B W. Ball Rd. (Between Brookhurst & Gilbert) (768-C7)

10:30 AM 24 HOUR GROUP SPEAKER,1025 S. Anaheim Blvd & Ball (Western Medical Hospital) (769-A7)

12:00 PM DISCUSSION,202 W. Broadway @ Lemon (768-J5)

12:00 PM PARTICIPATION,9581 #B W. Ball Rd. (Between Brookhurst & Gilbert) (768-C7)

5:30 PM DISCUSSION,202 W. Broadway @ Lemon (768-J5)

5:30 PM PART. CUTTING LOOSE,9581 #B W. Ball Rd. (Between Brookhurst & Gilbert) (768-C7)

7:30 PM BILL W S SOBER PACK,523 W Victor Ave @ Harbor (768-H3)

8:00 PM SPEAKER MEETING,9581 #B W. Ball Rd. (Between Brookhurst & Gilbert) (768-C7)

TamTam

1: Merge onto S Disneyland Dr 0.1 0:01
2: Turn RIGHT (East) onto W Ball Rd 0.7 0:02
3: Turn LEFT (North) onto S Lemon St 0.1 0:01
4: Turn RIGHT (East) onto Local road(s) 0.1 0:01
End: Arrive End < 0.1 < 1min
Total Route 1.2 mi 4 mins

This gets you to Western Medical Center

scootinbabe

tam? have i told you lately that i love you?

TamTam

Can you make it to a 10:30? Love you too

scootinbabe

well, dh is off at his convention...i'm here eating breakfast on floor with three small children. but, if it's close, then i can maybe make it sometime this week. that really really makes it do-able, tam. thank you!

how's the baby? any updates?

jules1973

I am going to go online and see where there is a meeting near me in Simsbury CT....

I have to get ou t of these pj's and face this day....I just don't remember how to get my hands dirty and do this my self....I just want someone to take it all away.......you know?

TamTam

Here are the others-

No word on William yet today. BTW- I'm am on puke patrol with my son today! And we are hosting 2 little children from Uganda tonight- they are travelling putting on concerts/dances at churches to raise money for their orphanage.


202 W. Broadway @ Lemon

Start: Depart Start on Local road(s) (East) < 0.1 < 1min
1: Bear LEFT (East) onto Local road(s) 0.4 0:01
2: Keep STRAIGHT onto S Disneyland Dr < 0.1 0:01
3: Bear RIGHT (North) onto Ramp < 0.1 < 1min
4: Take Ramp (LEFT) onto I-5 [Santa Ana Fwy] (I-5) 0.7 0:01
5: Turn RIGHT onto Ramp (Lincoln Ave) 0.3 < 1min
6: Turn RIGHT (East) onto W Lincoln Ave 0.6 0:01
7: Turn RIGHT (South) onto S Harbor Blvd 0.1 < 1min
8: Turn LEFT (East) onto W Broadway 0.2 0:01
End: Arrive End < 0.1 < 1min
Total Route 2.4 mi 5 mins

TamTam

9581 W. Ball Rd

Start: Depart Start on Local road(s) (West) 0.2 < 1min
1: Merge onto S Disneyland Dr 0.2 0:01
2: Turn LEFT (West) onto (W) Ball Rd 2.1 0:04
3: Road name changes to Ball Rd [W Ball Rd] 0.3 0:01
4: Keep STRAIGHT onto Ball Rd 0.1 < 1min
End: Arrive End < 0.1 < 1min
Total Route 2.9 mi 6 mins


523 W. Victor Ave

Start: Depart Start on Local road(s) (East) < 0.1 < 1min
1: Bear LEFT (East) onto Local road(s) 0.4 0:01
2: Keep STRAIGHT onto S Disneyland Dr < 0.1 0:01
3: Bear RIGHT (North) onto Ramp < 0.1 < 1min
4: Take Ramp (LEFT) onto I-5 [Santa Ana Fwy] (I-5) 0.7 0:01
5: Turn RIGHT onto Ramp (Lincoln Ave) 0.3 < 1min
6: Turn RIGHT (East) onto W Lincoln Ave 0.6 0:01
7: Turn LEFT (North) onto (S) Harbor Blvd 1.1 0:02
8: Turn LEFT (West) onto W Victor Ave 0.1 0:01
End: Arrive End < 0.1 < 1min
Total Route 3.2 mi 6 mins

**I hope you can get to one... xoxo

scootinbabe

go jules go!

you are doing it--just open the door. be willing to go to any lengths. the rest will come...

TamTam

Jules- it seems like we all have that in common- most of us anyway. We want the easier, less complicated way out of things. I know I do. That is definitely one of the more challenging aspects of this... YOU CAN!

scootinbabe

tam, have i told you lately that i love you ;-)

also, have i told you how inspiring you are? don't know how you do it all!


jules--now, don't let that supertam intimidate you. i'm here still in my pajamas and i'm at disneyland for goodness sakes!